h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I can never find anything when I need it in the shed, I love hand tools, when I moved South all I had was a bag of tools on my back, literally, I still buy them compulsively, funny enough I bust my ratchet screwdriver, had it for years then sent for a new one off ebay, but, we went to a car booty at Warborough, a lovely village about 5 miles away yesterday morning and what did I see but a nice ratchet driver for 50p? Raised eyebrows from my missus and so I've got two when my new one arrives, and I can't bear to throw my old one out even though it's knackered! The quiz was a right laugh, here Pinky, "a slug's blood is green, true or false?" Right ruckus on our table over that one, after much debate we managed to get it wrong!!!!! It's true apparently, but I'm not going to squidge one to find out! Actually I'll meet a few this morning, I'm re-roofing the birdhouse! I spotted some old fence panels on a tip at the sports club yesterday, just the job, owt for nowt hinny! Your lot have still got a decent chance but the Toon are doomed, even though they're playing much better since our manager took over, but he'll be gone when we go down. My bro in law in Canada, my younger sister's husband is failing fast, they were here last summer, he wasn't great then, reet my guest cats are queuing up at the patio door, I call the back garden cougar park, Love, Ham.

I'm still around Pinky, we're off to Cornwall on Thursday this week, I hope all is well, Love, Ham.

Are you home ? Are you still away ? I'll write later Ham catch you up on the latest ermmmm events ! Hope you had a fabulous break anyway ,thinking of you Love Pinks XXX

Hope the weather is better where you are Ham ,we had sleet here today ,honestly Love Pinks XXX

Hello sweetheart, back and got to a computer at last, we had a smashing week in Penzance, We love the place, a few problems at home Pinky, nothing we can't handle but not what we wanted to come back to, I'll tell you about it tomorrow, I'm still knackered after the drive, Love, Ham.

Hello Ham ,so pleased you had a wonderful time ,sorry you came back to whatever it is you came back to ! Thinking of you,we'll catch up when you catch your breath. Love Pinks XXX

Hi Pinky, we've got a lovely day here, it was yesterday too, it was pretty chilly in Penzance but sunny mostly, we really enjoyed it. We've been worried about my elder granddaughter for some time now, she's 18, her life seems to have gone to a pretty miserable state which is quite heartbreaking for us , she's been diagnosed with an eating disorder, she's truly lovely, and it's not the proud granddad talking here, she really has had the best parenting, my daughtrer and her husband have been great without spoiling her, we of course have always worshipped her but it's so sad, she spends a lot of time with us which is great but knowing how to handle this is difficult, I was really good at working with kids with this kind of problem but I'm lost off now! I'm, a bit preoccupied but I'll be bending your ear anyway, Love, Ham.

You bend my ear anytime you want Ham ,I'm never far away. I am very sad to hear about your adorable granddaughter ,and I know how her upbringing is ,and will continue to be. It's so difficult ,so much stress on kids these days ,nothing like our youth at all,though the problem probably existed. Exams and uncertain career futures,pressure from the media,peer pressure etc., all of these things build up and cause untold misery.

Since my hubbys death ,I've been a little that way myself ,not hungry ,not fancying anything ,kids out ,what's the point in cooking for one etc etc ,always an excuse always a reason. I'm getting much better ,and making myself eat,it's not easy Ham ,and it is just stress ,grief ,and thinking 'what's the point ?'. I do understand your concerns and it is different dealing with a loved one from a stranger. I'm sure, as a family ,together you can pull her out of this ,or just find the reason. Sometimes it can be a simple comment ,and she is hurting or something. So difficult to pin point causes. Just know I am here Ham ,never far away,you know me ,you can shout ,scream if you want to ,I'll listen and understand ,then send the most useless solution ever ,but know I'm in your corner. Always xxx

Sunny days here too ,I've made a good start planting out the bedding ,and a few new tubs and display items,it's looking ,well ,what can I say ? Better ,slightly

I'll write tomorrow Ham ,just hoping things are brighter for you all. Sending love and a great big hug Pinks XXX

Just a quickie to say have a good Sunday Ham ,hugs Love Pinks XXX

That's really sweet, thank you so much. I saw my grandaughter today actually, I went up to walk the dog, she was busy swotting up for her exams and all seemed fairly normal, it upsets my daughter and her husband more than anything, that's perfectly natural of course, I've honestly dragged kids back from death's door through eating disorders, she's nowhere near needing admission or anything, it's easy enough for me I suppose, but she is definitely 'down' and it's so sad to see. I'm surrounded by gloom at the minute, my sis in law is in hospital in Newcastle again, my brother in law in Canada is on chemo, BUT I've got a date to go back to the hospital, I've got to go through all the pre op bollocks again goodness knows what they'll find this time, but I'm great apart from me bliddy knees! Looks like your lot are stopping up, fantastic win against Chelsea, broke me bliddy heart! I'm at daggers drawn with my neighbours, they've dropped me a note saying their builders are going to start work in exactly a months time, they haven't given me the proper thing for the 'party wall act', I've told my surveyor and he's on to it, they're so stupid, it's all you've got to protect yourself, I don't know if they think they can get away without paying for a survey or what, but it's all good fun, if they're not careful they'll end up going through the whole planning process again, hey I'm writing War and Peace, well not much peace, bet this doesn't send, Love Ham.

Oh ye of little faith, it did! Pinky is your business still up and running? You were talking about getting down to see your sis in Harrow on the Hill is that still on? Sounds like you could do with a break, are you still strutting your stuff on the dance floor? How's the dog? Oh it's our Golden Wedding early next month, we haven't even talked about it much, we'll do something but I bet my knee surgery will screw it all up, that's the trouble, you can't plan, we've been like this for two years. Oh I'll stop grumbling, but it's great to be talking to you, Love Ham.

Hello My Darling Friend ,always so wonderful to hear from you Ham . Lets hope this time ,they find nothing to delay this op any longer eh ? The sooner it's done ,the better. It's dragging on and on now.

I'm sure it's stress and anxiety ,exams and stuff with your granddaughter Ham ,hopefully when it's all over and she secures where she wants to be ,she'll calm down and realise ,it's not worth getting so upset with it all. I hope she does well .

So ,the building next door is going ahead then ? These programmes on TV don't help ,move or just extend the home you're in sort of programmes ...knocking walls down ,building another one up somewhere. I'm still not sure that building won't block your light Ham ? Did you check it out ? If not I would ,if you have ,check it again. Keep the war raging ,I might see you on that show Neighbours from Hell hahahahaha hilarious hahahaha

Yes ,the shop is still 'blooming' ,to coin a phrase ,and yes I am still dancing . We got promoted to the next class ,more advanced ,six weeks before the end of the beginners course ..I'm not ruling Strictly Come Dancing out yet Ham hahaha I can do a mean tango now ,next week,the foxtrot ,I'm enjoying every minute to be honest Ham. I'm supposed to be going down to London towards the end of next month. My brother said he'll come up and drive me down in the car (seems I'm not to be trusted on roads or ,on public transport ,alone then ) I'll keep you informed Ham. I mean I do love seeing my nieces and nephews,to be honest ,what's putting me off is the thought of coming home and for the first time ,my hubby won't be here. I know it sounds silly ,it's just off putting to me,I shouldn't be so silly,sometimes ,little thoughts creep into my head and I think ,better off not going. Anyway ,like I said I'll keep you informed Ham.

Well ,Sunderland ,you mentioned it ,I wasn't going to hahahaha MUCH !!! I am ELATED hahahaha Geordie across the road shouted ,'It's a fluke !' I serenaded him ,singing 'We'll meet again ,don't know where ,don't know when' hahahaha he went into the house and slammed the door hahahahaha That's shut him up for another season hahaha It was touch and go mind Ham ,I thought we were going down with you lot for a few weeks Moving on ............Golden Wedding Anniversary ,I propose you have gold medals made and present them to each other on the special day ,you both deserve them ,what a wonderful milestone ,so rare these days,I hope it turns out to be an extra special day for you both Ham ,my sincere Congratulations to you both ,I think it's marvellous.

Right ,just got up ,it's so hot ,honestly ,I wanted a cold drink ,couldn't resist replying to your beautiful messages. Sending love and thoughts ,as always Love Pinks XXX

WOW,it sent ,somebody up there loves me hahahaha Love Pinks XXX

Hello Pinky, no I can't do anymore in regard to my neighbours, life's too short, there's this law about party walls but there's no teeth to it whatever, I spoke to a surveyor who offered to represent me, but my neighbour hasn't even given me the proper notice, then I find out they don't have too! what is the point of that! I've had an alcohol fuelled weekend, and the Toon went and won 5-1 today with ten men through most of the match, I could weep!!!! I've got to go for pre op again, I'm worried about it, last time I went up a fit bloke and came away on warfarin and with a respirator, honest there's nowt wrong with me except my knees! I could still dance the light fantastic with you mind! I've been slaving in the garden, got my leeks in, can't get moved for sweet peas! I bought some evening primrose yesterday, never grown them before, I've got all kinds of annuals in the greenhouse ready to go out, just waiting for a reasonable weather forecast. I'm picking lettuce, earthed up my spuds, I like to grow a few, and that's about the highlight of my life currently, life sure is teejus, Love Ham.

You can say that again Ham teejus is what it is. I've done nothing with planting out any veggies this year Ham ,all flowers and herbs,I could do a few tomato plants I suppose ,and I do love leeks ,perhaps I'll give them a go. The weather has been beautiful ,at night it gets cold ,I'll wait a little longer before I plant anything more ,so far the bedding is fine, the camellia plant someone bought me last year doesn't look too healthy ,it's been out all winter and seemed fine ,now ,it looks quite sad for itself.

I hope everything goes alright at the pre op test Ham ,everything was fine for us ,until my hubby had the pre op tests,then our world just turned upside down . I'll be thinking of you ,fingers crossed X Have you got a date yet ?

I saw some of the Newcastle game ,typical,they play their hearts out when the seasons over ,Sunderland did the same. It's a miracle we stayed up .

Right ,off to get ready for work and do battle with the world.I'll write later Ham. Love Pinks XXX

Sorry sweetheart. I didn't want to drag up traumatic memories for you. I'm just chopped off cos it's all got to happen again. I'm going on Friday. I'm not that worried honest. I've walked about 6 miles today, I use these two sticks and they really help. I stuck my morning Glory in (that's not a euphemism missus!) when I came back, so I'm well suntanned. I never get much luck with the old Morning Glory, I planted about 15, I'll be lucky if two take. I got my leeks out on Sunday actually, and they're looking good. Talking soccer, my great nephew I suppose he is has been transferred from the Toon to Spain, whoever Liverpool are playing tomorrow I think, whether he's sold or on loan I'm not sure, I've never met him, but it's really exciting, his name is Suddick, he's the grandson of the great Alan Suddick who broke the then record transfer fee when he was transferred from the Toon to guess where? Blackpool, in the early sixties, they were a big club those days! I'm having real problems typing this, keeps going all blue and I had a job getting on the site, hope this sends! Love, Ham.

It has been troublesome lately Ham ,this site,I've had a few problems and just gave up,seems ok now.

It's all halt on the gardening up here for now ,it's turned really cool ,we've had rain ,so good for the plants ,just not good enough for us gardeners. I know you do love your Morning Glories Ham ,I'm going to have to give them a go.

Ruddick ,I do know that name and saw Alan Ruddick on some talk show once ,one of the great players by all accounts,has to be if he's related to you Ham Nice to have someone to 'keep an eye on' though ,and I will.

I went to my dance class Wednesday ,the slow foxtrot ! Quite frustrating to learn actually ,well to me anyway. I think I'm more Latin American than ballroom hahahaha I'll keep practising ,it can only get better Ham.

Me Mam has to have one of those injections in her knee ,like you had I think ,a steroid injection I think she said . She's suffering so much pain ,driving her mad ,I just hope it works as well for her as it did for you Ham. I'll let you know anyway. I mean if you can walk six miles ? It must be doing some good. I just hope it all went well today for you.

Sending every best wish ,speak soon. Love Pinks XXX

Suddick man, not that clogger Ruddock, he was a beast! Oh and don't get confused with Colin Suggett, who was a great player for your lot in the late 60's early 70's I think. I went up the hospital yesterday for my pre op, all OK but they're still going on about my BMI being too high, honest I'm not that fat, I've been the same for years more or less, they're hopeless, I've got to go and see the anaesthetist before they'll get on I was actually having a go at the Doc yesterday, I'm going to have to complain this is just ridiculous, he hadn't even read my notes, they're rushed off their feet, I hate making bother but what choice have you got? I went for a ride along the river on Thursday, along the Thames path from Dorchester, about 12 miles round trip I suppose, all off road, how can I not be fit enough to have a simple op? You ought to see my radishes, oo er missus!!! I saw Monty Don's on gardners world yesterday, his weren't half as good as mine! I do love my salads me! I grew spring onions in the greenhouse and planted them out, still under cloches at the minute but they look good, never grew them like that before, fiddly but they look fine. Sweet peas are climbing the trellis, and I've grown some annuals that are new to me, always exciting I'll let you know what they are next time, Echinaria I think, showy daisy things, Calendula and a couple more from seed they are looking good, I always grow annual dahlias, they're the best value of all if you ask me, lovely cut flowers and a big show in the garden for about a quid a packet! Reet, don't work too hard, I'm watching soccer the rest of the day, Scottish and English cup finals, Love. Ham.

Been a while Pinky, I hope all is well,Love, Ham.

At last Ham ,I've had terrible problems trying to log in at all ,couldn't find the email with my password etc. Eventually wrote to the moderators ,success at last ! Please accept my apology I was panicking.

We are having the most beautiful weather here ,sunshine everyday. The pure joy when my brother phoned me Thursday to tell me ,it was like November down in London (a gloating smile )

Me Mam spent hours at the hospital for that injection in her knee to be told ,they couldn't do it ,her blood pressure is too high ! I hope you're having more success Ham ? I have been thinking about you.

I'm sending this now ,just so you know everything is ok and I will write later. Love Pinks XXX