h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

benedictus got 15 years

On the third morning of the safari I shot an elephant in my pajamas. What he was doing in my pajamas I'll never know.

making a trunk call ?

tusk! tusk!

During our safari we were given points for our shooting skills. Alas, I got nothing but rhino zeros

But my mate was elephantastic

Of course, ze-bra is not worn by many of the local women.

Our guide took out us out one day and got us lost, safaris I know.

My girlfriend wore a ze-through-bra

my pants were too big and I went on safari with Won Hung Lo

Chinese fortune cookie reads: "A tiger does not change his stripes - not even for a zebra"

I think you're lion when you say that.

(I ain't and I can prove it: How often does a tiger meet a zebra? )

I saw an ant elope with a gazelle

I've never seen a flat zebra on a road I've crossed

I flattered a zebra once, but it never got neither flat nor cross

I was back in the jungle after being away for a long time. I set out first thing in the morning to see what's gnu.

safari as you could see eh!

I don't want to create a Rift (Valley), but Masai read this?

Dance studios have waltz to waltz carpeting.

Those who want to paint polka-dots have to find a good spot.

Here is a quick step to success: you have to make sure you jive with other folk. This way you won’t be in competition with your peers, or have to hustle as hard. This advice is solid; you can’t even poke a hole through it.