h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

eye stand up for birds

but not if hen-pecked

Only an eye -what about the rest of the bodie? Surely other bits stand as well.

Did you here of the foreign diplomat who, in a speech, apologised for 'cockroaching' on an audience's time. Afterward he was gently informed that he might have used 'encroach'. "Ah," he said, "the other gender."

The diplomat didn't have a hencyclopedic mind, evidently.
But maybe that's just an eggstreme eggsample.

like most government bodies/pee pole, ant no manners

I thought government bodies would reside in manors. No?

manor woman, all they hair concerned about, is £ & $ going in the back pocket


Scottish American Indian = Hawkeye the Noo

Out of youkneeform:

Hawkeye the nude?

There's allsew:

Hawkhouse the estate agent

Hawknose the Wellington

Hawkboot the Wellington

Hawkferret the ferret salesman

Not forgetting Hawkhalfapun the lowest form of half-wit.

Have you heard that song based on a Yorkshireman saying grace?

Reet pet, eat.

What happened when Chief Shortcake died?

Squaw bury shortcake.

durex-pect me to believe that, your only fishing -err! sorry codding


part Scottish songand I'll attack the low road

Eel go a long way, butt knot fairy nuff.

snuff said!

I'm not going to bee a nervous wreck, here's that sick squid I owe ewe

In the days of the dinosaurs, you would occaisonally see a nervous tyrannosaurus wrecks.

don't be diplodocus, it would have to see a shrink firstespecially, that size

There's a farm where dinasaurs are raised. You should see the Barney-yard.

ah! that purple one


haze once saw hit, butt hit was hover my head

It's okay to have things hover over your head, but don't stick it in an oven, as a mind is a terrible thing to baste.