h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Day breaks, but no one gets upset about it.

You know, that's never dawned on me. And being fair skinned I'm far from being dusky.

I woke up at the crack of noon
and still I felt 'twas all too soon

morning broke as well as night fell - at least I didn't get the blame

I can't even think of a ............week............pun at the moment

if you have pungents, where are the punladies ?

They're all pun-ch drunk!

They were as different as Doris Day and Gladys Knight.

They ran a music store together. One day a thief robbed them, and got away with the lute.

and left them with the s

I saw something similar to moss the other day, but I didn't know what to lichen it to.

A lot of shady characters are waiting for their day in the sun.

Seven days without a pun makes one weak.

For many people cats are the purrfect pet that they like to paws with after a busy day.

Twins are born more often on two's-day.

After punching his computer and breaking his hand, the guy required tech knuckle support.

Thirsty jokers can be seen waiting in the punch line.

I think a joker is someone who has been dealt a bad hand.

But they're always a real card aren't they.

Is a joker a gambler who is one card short of a deck?