This is the Message Centre for Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Reality Manipulator Posted May 6, 2008
Paris of Troy was so named because his mother had a considerable amount of gaul and married a Frenchman
What happened to the butcher who backed into his meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work.
Person 1: Why exactly do you find ellipses romantic?
Person 2: Because a kiss is a lip tickle.
Do you want some cheese to go with your whine?
"You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish. Unless of course, you play bass."
He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
A will is a dead giveaway.
Randy was discharged from the Marines because he was rotten to the corps.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant Posted May 6, 2008
Everybody was talking about the explosion in the boarding house: roomers were flying
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Reality Manipulator Posted May 6, 2008
What did the Scottish baker say to the sheep?
I knead ewe!
Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says: "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger.
When fish are in schools they sometimes take the-bait (debate).
A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant Posted May 7, 2008
Did you hear about the thief who ran into a shower room and made a clean getaway?
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. Posted May 7, 2008
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant Posted May 7, 2008
There was another thief who jumped on a scale and got a weigh.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. Posted May 7, 2008
Jamaica err! no
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant Posted May 7, 2008
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. Posted May 7, 2008
you mind that Turkey, yugoslav and you can wipe it up,plus make sure it's defrosted and not Chile
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant Posted May 8, 2008
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. Posted May 8, 2008
I'm not that Hungary at the moment, I'll Peru'se the menu later
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
T.B. Falsename ACE: [stercus venio] I have learned from my mistakes, and feel I could repeat them exactly. Posted May 8, 2008
you're being very Prague-matic Prof, but you wanna be careful, that Monza greedy SOB who'd Eaton everthing they had in the all you can eat restaurant.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Reality Manipulator Posted May 8, 2008
My friend Max hates going up steep hills.
He's always been a bit of an anti-climb Max.
A chicken in love is poultry emotion.
A Wolf in sheep's clothing is a wear-wool-f.
A man was charged with stealing ducks from a local pond in a small English village.
When in court, the judge asked how he pleaded. He replied 'Not guilty Mallard'.
Why is the mushroom always asked to a party?
Because he’s a fungi (fun guy)
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant Posted May 8, 2008
The mushroom is unique, because after it was created, God broke the mold.
Someone who's an expert on seafood would be an af-fish-ionado.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. Posted May 8, 2008
if they didn't share, would they be shellfish ?
Hull expect me to believe that
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant Posted May 9, 2008
I expect that the sea anemonies would share with their fronds.
The octopi might seem stingy, but they're really only squidding.
Most fish learn about sharing when they're in schools.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
T.B. Falsename ACE: [stercus venio] I have learned from my mistakes, and feel I could repeat them exactly. Posted May 9, 2008
In the same vein as "Paris of Troy was so named because his mother had a considerable amount of gaul and married a Frenchman". Lazlo and Georg Biro were so named as their mother had a penchant for ballpoints and Henry Ford's mother carried on in the back of auto mobiles, and thus he was conceived
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. Posted May 9, 2008
if Mr Ford had a flattop, would he be converted ?
the dace is on and eel have to run well, mackerel run this year as will the salmon, they're in 2rd plaice
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
T.B. Falsename ACE: [stercus venio] I have learned from my mistakes, and feel I could repeat them exactly. Posted May 9, 2008
Two of the most powerful politicians in Scotland are Alex Salmon-d and Nicola Sturgeon. When Richard Trout and Barry Mackerel turn up I'm leaving the country.
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
Reality Manipulator Posted May 9, 2008
"Back to Basics", by Rudy Mentary
"Fitted Carpets", by Walter Wall.
"High Explosives", by Diana Mite.
"Painkillers", by Penny Cilin.
What's the difference between a weasel and a stoat?
A weasel is weasily recognised but a stoat is stoatally different.
If you Russia round and Ukraine your neck, don't Crimea river.
What do you call a lonely Korean fish spirit?
A sole Seoul sole soul.
Key: Complain about this post
A Pun in the oven, or no Pun intended
- 461: Reality Manipulator (May 6, 2008)
- 462: paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant (May 6, 2008)
- 463: Reality Manipulator (May 6, 2008)
- 464: paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant (May 7, 2008)
- 465: Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. (May 7, 2008)
- 466: paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant (May 7, 2008)
- 467: Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. (May 7, 2008)
- 468: paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant (May 7, 2008)
- 469: Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. (May 7, 2008)
- 470: paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant (May 8, 2008)
- 471: Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. (May 8, 2008)
- 472: T.B. Falsename ACE: [stercus venio] I have learned from my mistakes, and feel I could repeat them exactly. (May 8, 2008)
- 473: Reality Manipulator (May 8, 2008)
- 474: paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant (May 8, 2008)
- 475: Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. (May 8, 2008)
- 476: paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant (May 9, 2008)
- 477: T.B. Falsename ACE: [stercus venio] I have learned from my mistakes, and feel I could repeat them exactly. (May 9, 2008)
- 478: Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U. (May 9, 2008)
- 479: T.B. Falsename ACE: [stercus venio] I have learned from my mistakes, and feel I could repeat them exactly. (May 9, 2008)
- 480: Reality Manipulator (May 9, 2008)
More Conversations for Prof Animal Chaos.C.E.O..err! C.E.Idiot of H2G2 Fools Guild (Official).... A recipient of S.F.L and S.S.J.A.D.D...plus...S.N.A.F.U.
Write an Entry
"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."