h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My current favourite is "Cloud Leader"


(Yep, me neither)



Any others you can share?

My least favorite, as its become so popular, and is so meaningless (because of the range of actual* jobs it describes), is still 'Administrator'.

Endless pages after pages after pages, of jobs, with this title, none of which give a clue as to what the job might be; Not helped by the vast majority being listed as for 'name of agency' rahter than the name of an actual company, which might otterwise give a clue as to what the job might b be, before one has to click through and read the apaulingly badly written and uninformative 'job descriptions' (so says someone who is still looking for a job.... )

My brother-in-law was heavily involved in "actualisation".

Looking through my old business cards I've had the same job for six years but I've had three different titles.

And they managed to spell my Christian name four different ways. Only four letters but four different spellings.

For years I was an "Adult Services Librarian." This was to distinguish it from the Children's Librarian, but "Adult" can have implications beyond what one would expect to find in a library.

"Behavioral Health Clinician" seems odd to me. Presumably a clinician is someone who works in a clinic, but it doesn't shed a lot of light on what that work entails. And "Behavioral health" seems an odd juxtaposition. Mental health is the term that used to be used. Do you go to a behavioral health clinic because you misbehave [in which case it's a punitive destination], or because your health has deteriorated enough to make behavior impossible?

Oh JHGDBC! I'm a Mental Health Criminal Justice Liaison Practitioner (I know, I know.....and actually, I'm not even sure as I write, that I have that all in the right order. And don't blame me, I didn't decide on that title.)

It's taken me ages to remember that. I don't want to have to remember that I am now a Behavioural Health Criminal Justice Liaison Practitioner instead.

I used to be a Forensic Psychiatric Social Worker. I've been other things since. Mentally Disordered Offenders Liaison Social Worker for instance. I still do the same job.

PP.

I'm not in charge of handing out awards for the most egregiously bloated job title, PP, but if I were I would award it to you.

Thank you. I shall add it to my 8 inch long ID badge.

PP.

Which by the way has the word 'liaison' slelled LIASON.

PP.

People who work in Subway are called 'Sandwich Artists', which I suppose is what Arthur Dent would be were he a real character...

When I worked at a bank, in the morning I was 'Yorkshire International Banking Centre' (formerly Leeds Customer Service Centre, but presumably renamed as it may have inadvertently given the impression that the bank believed in Customer Service) and in the afternoon I was 'Cheque Centre Helpdesk, Birmingham'. I didn't even change desks.

<BB<

You're lucky they even let you have a desk. One of my bosses thought the staff should be roaming all over the place. How we would be found if needed was never explained. But if I *wasn't* at my desk when the boss wanted me, she scolded me.

The other half's job title is: Historic Environment Records Officer, which isn't too mad, but the acronym is HERO

How about Moderator? Been a long time since I've seen
a moderator who wasn't just enforcing laws and rules
and not really Moderating anything as I understand the
verb To Moderate, the adjective Moderate or the adverb
Moderately. Joe Biden as a moderator?
Ban-ki Moon?
John Kerry?
The Deli Lamba?

"All things in Moderation"? I sure hope not,
but it seems to be the weigh of the whirled.


~jwf~

'Moderator' sounds like an action movie starring Paul Weller.

jwf, I think you need to read a few more threads.

The moderators here especially step in and moderate, such as replacing words that are banned with [comment] rather than banning the entire post. Or have you already forgotten that?

If you don't like the way they work, feel free to go somewhere else.

The Art Department recently changed its name to the Southampton Solent School of Art & Design, or SoSoSAD for short...

<BB<

It's so so sad, but it makes me laugh out loud

A few years ago, I worked in the 'Systems Solutions Operational Support Group'.

Nothing unusual about SSOSG, until you realise it's pronounced 'sausage'.

MADD stands for Mother Against Drunk Driving. No wonder they're mad.

The thing about acronyms is that people use them so much. After a while, people who are new to the process may not realize what the terms stand for, but don't want to be considered ignorant by asking. Ergo, companies have CEO's. Your boss may have an MBA. The company you work for may have an IT person.

[All of which reminds me of the alphabet soup in Allen Sherman's "Harvey and Sheila," set to a recognizable Middle Eastern song. Some of the acronyms are no longer in wiode use, e.g.

Shelia's girl I know,
Happy BDNO.
She works the PBX,
and makes out the checks.]

I worked at the Post Office for a while, and I swear they've got the most acronyms I've ever seen in one place.

Whenever people knowingly use too many though, I always love seeing their reaction when I ask "Is that a TLA?" More often than not they don't like to show their ignorance, and will just answer without thinking about it