h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Sooooooo much! I adore you, fairer sex . Though frankly, with my love life think I might as well join a monestary. Looks like I'm going to die a lonely od virgin

awwwww

i doubt very much that u will die, especially as a old virgin.
come here and give us a hug

A big sloppy wet one like Lassie the film star ok? .

Just been told off by my boss for "playing" on the computer and not getting on with my work. She asked me what I was doing and I said "Willy watching". She walked off in disgust, though did repeat "Get on with your work and stop telling porkies!"
Better do as I'm told, I know my place.

Looks like everyone is out enjoying the sunshine while I'm banged up at work (I really am at work! On a Sunday too!). Oh well, I'll sit here and and find something appropriate regarding this forum to amuse myself , as I usually do, and catch up on all the fun when everyone gets back .

I quite like the idea of dying a lonely Odd virgin... chuckled me


It's amusing how many male friends of mine assure me any of us (women) could pretty much pull anyone we like because all men are scared, desperate and willing... Funny how much rejection and indifference we get then isnt it? Maybe my male friends just happen to be, in the main, a little pathetic? Yeah, that's quite likely actually... poor sods...

I like the penis, I do wish men knew when they were thinking with it and could make a conscious decision when and how it was appropriate to do so... You know, a basic override switch for when they really need the blood some place else.

all men... easy? what a ludacrus suggestion... Well... Maybe some* truth in it I'm feeling neglected

aaah, 2legs. You always bring clarity to my thoughts and enhance my understanding... WHAT???? *backs away slowly and subtly allowing you time and space to rave in *

I don't think penes are very attractive, personally, except the one I made for creates a very realistic bump in pants!

BEG

Oh everyone is back, oh goody, better stop rummaging amusing myself and pay attention. I may miss something interesting. Probably will anyway, cos I'm still at work and my Boss is still telling me off for being a pathetic, genetalia, obsessed man, she's always calling me a Kn. I'm always pleased to see her, is very pretty, or is this a canoe in my pocket! (With thanks to Black Adder for that one.)

Personally I dont necessarily find them hugely aesthetically pleasing... But I do like them

Whether it's men, their appendages, friends, horses dogs... The less pleasing they are in terms of manners, behaviour, enjoyment (mine) and general conduct, the less attractive I find them...

translation, somebody? please?

Sadly, I fear the translation into words may suffer the almighty wrath of the profanity/decency filter I need a new 'Master'

I didnt like to assume, as that is so easy to do... But I had an inkling... I'm a fan of a good mix myself... like After Eight ice cream: Soft white lightly minted ice cream swirled with soft chocolate ice cream with a ripple of hedonistic dark chocolate mint sauce running through them both... chunks of hard, dark lusciousness throughout help to give texture and excitement...

Food is so much fun...

Oooooh, i like you Robyn Hoode Made me go all lumpy.

Oh good... I dont know if it made proper sense but if it reads as good as it tastes, it was a success

I think I got the meaning too

Please, do stop crying 2legs... There's now a puddle round my feet and it wasnt me for once...