h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Okay now, enough about dog's dirty bits. Is "crikey" (pronounced
cry-kee) really British English, or is it a myth like Leprachauns and Eskimos?

lol i was thinking this was for lots of laughs,was informed last night this was for laugh out loud.recently read forum posting where it must have been mistaken for lots of love,very disturbing.no offence was taken btw.and im still not a full ticket thankyou

Yes, Crikey does exist. It's not in common usage among most people though. It's quite old-fashioned, to be honest. Famous Five-era.

does it really matter either way?

it's just as confusing as cricket and crickets or things of that ilk

at least most of you seem to have the basics

imagine you were a first year english student in outer mongolia or somewhere you'd never get to the bottom of it

no that isn't another bum reference!!

It's odd - some people tell me that English is one of the hardest languages to learn, then other people turn around and say it's easy. Which is correct? I think possibly we have about the stupidest spelling in the world.

As some of you already know, I've been teaching English to foreigners for more than thirty years. The following answer is based on that experience:
Western Europeans find English easy, as it tends to be well taught and have similarities to their first language.Dutch,Swedes and Swiss are very often not detectable as non-native speakers. Spanish,French and Italians are usually OK too but with what Monty Python would call "outrageous accents".
Most Africans are intelligible, but they find the grammar difficult.
Since English may be their fourth or fifth language, they're good at self-teaching.
The Chinese can make themselves understood very easily but to become proficient takes years of grind as the grammar, writing system and pronunciation are hopelessly alien.
English spelling isn't stupid as long as you know some history, but it's another thing to learn that is more difficult the further east you go. Let's hope spellcheckers get refined fairly soon.
(For stupid spelling try Polish )

The discussion about 'crikey' reminds me of other harmless ejaculations which seem to have gone out of fashion. Gosh, by Jove, good lord, flippin' 'eck (see earlier in this forum),my goodness; all now often replaced by invective or grunting noises. Such terms are admittedly just verbal shorthand for "that is surprising/amazing/ disappointing/disgusting/awful" and so on, but I think that the language is poorer without them.

Well after renovation work in the kitchen and general NAFF terror, as well as the kids being home and hogging the telephone lines, I have finally had half an hour to read the last 60 or so postings so my comments go a long way back.

As to the Bretons coming from the British Isles to France, I would stick my neck out and say that it was the other way round - surely they just stayed there and the rest crossed over. If I remember my history from school, on all the diagrams the migration went from East to West, the Angles, Saxons, Jutes, Vikings, Normans, Picts, Celts, etc., etc., etc.

And as for all the other things I was going to say, having finished laughing at all that lot, I've now forgotten them.

What about the fashion for using words to mean the opposite of what they really do. The French use "terrible" for something really great, Michael Jackson confused the world by singing "Bad" and meaning "good" - and everything else is just "wicked".

Hope this tale may shed a little light on the whole Dog Debate.
A mate of mine had been travelling in South East Asia for some time when he was invited to be the guest of honour at the villages latest religious feast, something to do with Male Initiation rites.
Having enjoyed a delicious meal of rice and poodle, he was presented with an ornately decorated wooden box. Upon opening it he saw, sitting on a bed of wild, black rice what he took to be a couple of deep fried prawn balls. (Ya just know what's coming don'tcha). having brought much blessing upon the locals by eagerly devouring the delicacy he had a little difficulty keeping the whole twenty courses down when the carcass of the small dog was produced, mius it's bollocks.
Hence the dogs bollocks being an indication of the best one can have.
Any clearer chaps???

i worked with a zulu once at least 8 feet tall on his toes.he had a british accent and what i can only discribe as a british grammatic postureing.he had no trouble at all with english better than soom of the locals around here from adeeper intrest i assume.his name is the same as mine but backwards ,mij

The scottish version of 'crikey' seems to be 'jings'.
A wonderful word, but does anyone really say it?

I do actually know one person that uses crikey in everyday conversation!

but then he also uses "blimey o'riley!" and "shinanigans" ( no I don't know how to spell it but its a brilliant word don't u think? )

I think the boy might need help tho!!

'Shenanigans' I believe - probably a Breton word meaning 'Crikey, I have migrated in the wrong direction.'

Nice one percy!

I always thought that 'Crikey' was just a nicer form of 'Christ!', in the same way as flipping heck was a polite version of another phrase(f***ing he**), so that the less scatalogical among us could swear nicely.

Quite. Like Crumbs (as in Crumbs - I have migrated in the wrong direction) ... I'm sure it's people - probably kids, starting to explete and then changing their minds because Mum (big sis, prospective girlfriend, Sister Mary, Headmaster) is about. As long as it sounds expressive and has lots of hard consonants it still serves the purpose of letting off steam, so why offend someone while you're doing it.

In that case, why have that particular four-letter word at all?

Well, I think that just because it's more fun.

You may find saying he** much more relieving than heck...

Same as fu**ing and freaking... it's so Vegetarian.
Profanity is leting off steam the Legitimate way, Dont u think?

If it's vegetarian isn't it letting off steam the 'legumate' way?

scat talk(talkingsh!t)not to be confused with scat singing.on a pisser(drunk)pissed(very mad)piss off(go away)ohhhdidilydidilyscoowopwopchaaaaaa

or even possibly "horlicks" always helps in a being observed type situation !!
Funnily enuff actualy feels like real swearing