h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Not sure about 'Mother!', K. To my sensitive soul I thought it an abbreviation for the term 'Motherf*****' (see, I cant even write it!)

Syncopated Sausages! springs to mind, but I'm sure it comes from a cartoon/childrens book somewhere.

Just in case anyone didn't know it, "bloody" is an abbreviation or corruption of the original "God's blood" - to be found as " 'sblood" in Shakespeare and contemporaries. So that's why it is considered swearing. The word bloody as in "I cut my knee and got my white knee length cotton socks all bloody" is of course not swearing, but kids must enjoy saying it!

Like the exciting bit in Geography when you get to arable farming and are allowed to say "rape" out loud.

Daffy Duck says 'Mother!' when something dreadful has or is about to happen to him. I don't think he's being rude, just charmingly pathetic.

Brits have a wonderful word - Gormless - which I understand means 'stupid'. (Wonderful, of course, unless it's directed at you.

I'd just like to know what a gorm is and why stupid people haven't got it. (I hope I've got one!)

Your gorm is usually just below your wit.

Shenanigans!
For the record, 'smeg' was in (perhaps uncommon) currency years before the puerile Red Dwarf besmirched our television screens.

Bloody as swearing vs bloody as not swearing.

This reminds me of a joke in which the Pope and the Archbishop visit a restaurant:

Waiter: are you ready to order, your excellency?
Pope: I want a bloody steak.
Archbishop: That's the way to talk to the fuckers!

I'm none the wiser.

she said, wistfully.

(your wist, whether full or empty, is on the other side of your gorm)

Another one from Scarymuppet:
Is 'garn' of My Fair Lady fame still in common use? I need to know, as I am planning a trip to London next summer. By the way, is the worst trend ever, scooters, catching on in the U.K? It's just such a terrible trend!

Keep it real,
Scarymuppet

I will revert to Billy Connolly's " Gettyfu Yabasa"


Glaswegiains will understand

'G'

TC
The boys' equivalent was metalwork, where you could ask for the "bastard file" but only if you knew the names of two other sorts of file.
PvW
I assumed that "smeg" was an abbreviation for smegma?

Sorry to be boring but I still don't know what a flabber is and how it gets gasted.Anyone one got any ideas?

The flabber is another name, of course, for your gorm. The plural of Gorm, is, oddly, gormen. They too get ghasted. (Has he peaked, or what!)

GROAN!

In response to that would the anglasised version be " curses to murgatroid " ??
For the uninitiated get some tapes ( audio ) of the goon show
For those extremely difficult swearing situations you could always do as my mother was wont to do and try a foriegn language ( she could speak 'bout 10 different ones !!)
Although this did lead to me unfortunatley (at the age of about 3 )
swearing in fluent greek at my half greek cypriot aunt who predictably hit the roof
It also had the knock on effect of mum learning a language that no-one in the family spoke!!!

Alright I know that was miles off the track but I haven't got the hang of this yet
( yes I know I'm whining but you've got to keep to the traditions of these great cultural stereotypes!! )

Btw scarymuppet
no and yes unfortunatley
I find sticking a leg out at knee hieght really helps!!

I usually use "Doggammit" and "For Bob's sake"

3

JOTD: Feel disillusioned? I've got some great new illusions, right here!

Back home if we don't like something, we say it sucks.

Brits always seem very uncomfortable with this expression!

Yes - well its difficult to suck with a stiff upper lip .