h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Here. let me give you a hand. i'll hold this and you can grab the wriggler..

ohhhh


sorry honey

Bloody chain mail gets everywhere, ooo that doesn't feel like a Nibbler.

Look if you aven't done this before just grab it behind the head and pull hard, go on then it wont bite.

99.9% of things described as "not going to bite", actually do.

*sneaks back out quietly*

Gently woman, gently you're strangling it, look it's gone a funny colour, quick give it mouth to err.

::wurra wurra wurra::

Some fellow named Moe Zart was born on this date.

*Faints*

Useless Fact:

The famous wrestler, Andre the Giant, died on January 27th. His cremated remains were scattered on a horse ranch in NC

I miss Andre... He was such a nice fellow.

Who doesn't like Fezzik?

23.6% of statistics are made up on the stop

or on the spot, whatever

I said this here before but it was a long time ago:

5 out of 3 people do not understand fractions.

Here's some random facts for y'all:


In the 1400's a law was set forth that a man was not allowed to beat
his wife with a stick any thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the
rule of thumb".

Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled
"Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered
into the English language.

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were
Fred and Wilma Flintstone

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

Coca-Cola was originally green.

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour is 61,000

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

The first novel ever written on a typewriter was Tom Sawyer.

Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar

111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in
the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in
the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If
the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural
causes.

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go
until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand

Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and
laser printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.

Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed
firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase: "Goodnight, sleep tight."

It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a
month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his
son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and
because their calendar was
lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know
today as the honeymoon.

In English pubs, ale was traditionally ordered by pints and quarts. So
in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at
them "Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down." It's where we get
the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into
the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill,
they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the
phrase inspired by this practice.

~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.

<>

Actually there are people who can.

<>

Actually it's a honey wine.

I hate to burst your bubble Taz but a fair bit of the stuff you've put there is apocryphal (or at least wildly inaccurate).

Not quite so useless fact:
On this day in 1945 the Red Army liberated Auschwitz.

I'm going down the list one at a time.... BRB

You got this in an E-mail I'm sure... so... here we go:




>>In the 1400's a law was set forth that a man was not allowed to beat
his wife with a stick any thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the
rule of thumb".<<

The "rule of thumb" is concerned with measurement, not law. http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-rul1.htm

>>Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled
"Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered
into the English language.<<

Thats just not true at all. The word "golf" comes from words that meant "club"
http://golf.about.com/cs/historyofgolf/a/hist_golfword.htm

"The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were
Fred and Wilma Flintstone<<

Wrong: That honor goes to a TV sitcom called "Mary Kay and Johnny"
http://www.snopes.com/radiotv/tv/marykay.htm


>>Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.<<
Possibly true.

>>Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.<<
No proof.

>>Coca-Cola was originally green.<<
False. http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/green.asp

>>It is impossible to lick your elbow.<<
Some people can. http://www.guinnessworldrecords.com/content_pages/record.asp?recordid=48925

>>The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour is 61,000<<
Widely quoted, no actual statistics cited.

>>Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.<<
Doubtful: Zinc inhibits copper absorbtion.

>>The first novel ever written on a typewriter was Tom Sawyer. <<
Either that or "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn". Even Mark Twain wasn't sure which one was first.


>>Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar<<
French cards represent specific courts... English/American cards never did. http://www.cs.man.ac.uk/playing-cards/tmfaq/tmfaq.html

>>111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321 << True

>>If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in
the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in
the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If
the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural
causes.<<
Only coincidentally when true. http://www.cs.man.ac.uk/playing-cards/tmfaq/tmfaq.html

>>Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go
until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand <<
True... try it.

>>Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and
laser printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.<<
True: As were life rafts, rotary engines and elevated railways. http://www.factmonster.com/ipka/A0906931.html

>>Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey<<
Honey doesn't spoil but it's not the only food that doesn't. Granulated sugar doesn't spoil either. There are probably others.

>>In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed
firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase: "Goodnight, sleep tight."<<
Pretty unlikely - it probably referred to tucking in the blankets to avoid nocturnal draughts.

>>It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a
month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his
son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and
because their calendar was
lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know
today as the honeymoon.<<
False: The word 'honeymoon first appeared in the 16th century and had nothing to do with alcohol. http://www.word-detective.com/041798.html

>>In English pubs, ale was traditionally ordered by pints and quarts. So
in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at
them "Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down." It's where we get
the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"<<
Possibly: one of several theories.

>>Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into
the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill,
they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the
phrase inspired by this practice.<<
False: Just try and whistle at your bartender and see if how fast you get your beer. http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-wet1.htm

~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~

>>At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.<<
Come on. You already knew better.

ooooeeeerrrrrr sorry bout that mistur d.. u know i'm still only learning bout ferrets an the like...

i didn't hurt ya did i?

I just licked my elbow.

...anyone know a good surgeon?

RF

... trying to imagine RF all contorted ... or is that contortionate? hey! I just made up a word! to the other thread