h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

* s after the biscuits

*chaos begins to end as brown suited security bloke walks into room and gives a shifty look*

*makes way to back of queue*

*rejoins queue, and watches 'Saturday boy' being randomly beaten by the security guards, before being carted off to who-knows-where
*as he has been in the queue a long while begins feeling hungry, and eats a samosa and a picori from his trolley

*sees 2legs eating and becomes peckish* to fruit n veg section, nicks a grape while avoiding brown suit bloke

*continues eating, the quiche, the cheese, the other cheese, the other cheese, the apples, bannanas, porkpies sausages 'my basket is empty' I wonder how that happened *wonders off round the shop again searching for food

*the Halibut finishes reading the newspaper, throws it in the bin and reenters the store, grabbing a french stick, and begins hitting customers over the head with it

*throws peanuts at the people in the queue

*chases the girl from behind the cheese counter

"excuse me i think i was before you!"

Correct. Especially the bit using the past tense

*continues chasing the girl from teh cheese counter

wanders over to nicely stacked shelfs which have just been faced up and removes 1 item from the front of each display.

Well someones gotta make work for the schoolies

* spots a nicely stacked pyramid of baked beans, and takes the bottom middle can, with the expected results <boing. *returns chasing the cheese counter girl

the one right at the back you say?

I'm calling the fuzz!

wanders off as he really doesn't need to know what it looks like when a Granny gets grabbed by the fuzz

granny wanders off laughing at the motorbike being towed away. 'how could anybody want to ride that hairdryer'