h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*throws his jockstrap at Jordan and returns to the dugout and the *

*lobs the Grenade of Nullification at Jordan, utterly destroying his Ring of Supreme Perfection*

Watch for sunburn there, Egon....

Bugger. The jockstrap and Nullification grenade initiated a chain reaction, which not only ruined my Perfect status, but made me forget the result of the chicken-and-egg problem. I'm paralysed with indecision... The chicken... no, the egg... no, it was...

It was the egg! And I'm back in the game!

- Jordan

I'm sorry, your Egon system is not capable of a response at this moment due to rampant rumpy-pumpy witha memeber of the emergency services. Please try again soon.

*ENGAGED TONE*

*rapidly throws Jordan a dozen eggs, one by one, forcing him to juggle them or wear them, then dons a Teflon Cloak and *

*a sound of music comes from the dugouts stereo system*


Juliet, when we made love, you used to cry

[Neatly catches the eggs in the small frying pan which he keeps in his rucksack /just/ /in/ /case/, and commences to cook them on something that looks inexplicably like a small gas hob.]

Want some eggs?

[Considers tossing some eggs at Egon, but realises he has enough of his own...]

- Jordan

There's no crying in Calvinball!

VOLARE!
OH-OH!
VOLARE!
OH_OH!

[Anhaga, still trapped in the bindings of his snowboard is heard to curse] Da@# thong you made me wear! I quit! [and he unsubsribes for the moment with other -- not better -- things to do]

*inserts earplugs to drown out Egon's caterwauling, then does a masterful tumbling run across the playing field.*

Bye, Anhaga. You might try a pry bar on that board!

never mind the board: I need it for the thong!

(I lied about unsubscribing. That's called deaking out the goalie.)

*returns fresh-faced, with a and a hastily re-acquired calvinball uniform.*

Right, Juliet has a 999 call to attend (911 for Americans) so I'm available to sub back in!

*continues her tumbling routine, but runs into the periscope for the sub Egon called up AGAIN*

*shouts down to the nuclear sub*

Good boy.

Picks up the and fires it with a croquet mallet towards the far end of the pitch.

Hey, we use 911, too! First one in Canada was in Edmonton A997833

Fair enoughski, is all I can say.

*pulls out a revolver this time, shoots down the *