h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What's wrong witH Australians?:

Too darn good at cricket.

Why doesn't that matter:

because the nation gave us XXXX, Fosters, VB, Australia Day and the Hollioake brothers.

oh, and Rolf Harris is, indeed,

(said as gently as possible)

I don't want to sound anal or anything....but could we please refrain from using the word "Abo"....it kind of gets my back up...

I've spent some time in Australia, and found them to be very direct, forthright, open, and friendly people.

And at the expense of offending some... Aussies seemed like Americans at their best. Maybe that's why we get along so well.

I do have to strongly disagree with the statement that they aren't generally racist. I was treated to some lengthy discourses concerning the large scale immigration of Southeast Asian peoples. To repeat any of it would probably get me banned from this site.

Australians have an irritatingly easy to pick up accent. Perfectly normal sounding english people go there for a year or so and come back with their sentances ending an octave higher than they started.

sometimes you can end up with the inflections after a night in "walkabout"

I once heard an Irish girl in the toilets of my local saying "y'right?" over and over again....trying to perfect the accent....I must admit by the end she was rather good at it!

Whats wrong with Australians? Well its like this, they are such a kind of people, you want them to live the other side of the world. LOL

I really dislike Australian Rising Inflection when used by people who aren't Australian. I blame Neighbours and Home and Away, and I'm not grateful for either of those. But Skippy makes up for them!

And Australians are irritatingly good at cricket.

didn't Stephen Fry put that Australian inflection thingy into room 101?

He did, and quite right too in my view!

although i think he called it AQI (Australian Question Intonation)

The Australian accent is quite lyrical and hypnotic in its beauty, especially when spoken by one of the native beauties of the feminine persuasion... until they attempt to say my name.

"Mike," I say.

"MOIke?", they say.

"You mean 'Mick'?", they say.

"Yeah, fine, sure, whatever... just don't do that again. Jeeze, what did I ever do to you?", I say.

btw, did anybody see KC in the last few days?

ok...here we go :

What is the difference between a buffalo and a bison ??



















...you can't wash yer hands in a buffalo.








alec. demanding that all strines show us the shackle marks.


...convict pommie royal subjects.

....Well, with a father who is of (mostly ) Irish descent, and a mother who is Aboriginal (with Scottish somewhere up the line?), I must confess I have no shackle marks....

Ah, ya all come to Canada and work at the ski resorts! I haven't been to a mountain in years that didn't have a majority of Ozzies.

....most of us don't have snow here....(I myself have never seen snow in real life!)....and couting the house with flour and putting the fan on isn't the same...not to mention the terrible mess, the sneezing and coming out of it looking like a ghost!

Excuse me, but you must have been at our last reunion! Loads of fun for the whole family.

It is true though, every single lift operator and waiter and driver seems to be from the land of OZ. Not that that is a bad thing, but do you have a load of young Canucks down there?