h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Something I'd love to do at the moment when a group of students refuses to be shushed. Think Basil Fawlty...

*point to books* - - - - - - - - - This library.

*point to clearly worded sign* - - This silent study area.

*the next step is obvious* - - - - This smack on head.

*run away feeling much better*

David

A strange choice, but if I could draw well I would like to do a modern version of the Bayeux Tapestry in the style of the original but based on modern event such as the Falklands War or 9/11.

Going back to the whole dealing with people who litter theme, I once really did do what I always wanted to do. The chap opposite me on the tube dropped his chocolate wrapper and drink carton on the floor. Mine was the next stop, so as I got up to get off, i picked up his rubbish, put them on his lap, and said sweetly 'Don't forget your litter!' before, frankly, legging it (so I have no idea how he reacted).

I wish I was brave enough to do it all the time.

Spinks, the Bayeux tapestry idea is very cool indeed. Can I help? I'm quite good with a needle.

I spent several minutes in the pouring rain tonight picking up chip papers and alcopop bottles from opposite my shop.They had been dropped by kids that quite frankly I think should have been in bed at that time of night not roaming the streets. So I would like to go and see the parents of these little darlings and tell them what their kids have been doing and then give them a hefty fine for not giving a damn about what their kids get up to, a fine that will double if their kids do it again. Iknow it wouldn't make a jots worth of difference but it would make me feel beter

Agapants, I think it's one of those things I'll never get round to.

Also, if I was very very good at painting I would like to do famous paintings in the style of other artists. Maybe the Haywain in the style of Van Gogh, or Sunflowers in Constable style. I think they'd have good novelty value.

I would like to develop a form of MRSA superbug that would only kill Charvés and Estate agents!!!

I actually did something that ought to go in this thread...

Was queueing to get into a concert (Franz Ferdinand at London Astoria ), and there were loads of random people walking up and down and giving people in the queue leaflets. I got fed up with this and when one of them turned after giving me some I slipped all the leaflets I'd been given into his pocket and he didn't notice .

I like to stuff unsolicited mail {with my name & address removed of course} into envelopes provided by other unsolicited mailers, and post it to them.



Things I won't do:
See current journal.
I would love to tell the vaccine-manufacturers' Solicitors to stuff their offer of "closure" where the sun don't shine, but I won't. That little word "costs" frightens me to death

Before I die I would like to sleep with a woman, or a couple, or a couple of men, but I won't.

en

I *have* challenged owners who have left a steaming packet on the pavement at the front of my home.
But it's almost always given me the about-to-have-a-heart-attack feeling, collecting litter is preferable than having to clean up poo!

I would like to go blonde...just to see what I look like...but I won't. My hair is too dark and I'd have roots showing tomorrow!!!!

Fill a bucket with Marks and Spencer's cheesecake and see if I really *could* scoff the lot as I always so I could.

Pass my driving test!!!

I could say but this is a family show

Say 'oh really' to anyone who speaks to me.

I love for there to be a cockney day, where everyone had to speak cockney for a day, so I can refer to my boses as 'slags'!!!

Gor blimey Mary Poppins!

Oi, leave it auut, I dun' no whaauut your onna abaaat!!!!

Dress up in a badger costume and wear a badger hat and badger shoes and badger pants for the London Summer meet.... I probably won't be able to find such things, or afford them if I could, and I'm not good at making costumes I might have to settle for a daft linen suit instead

2legs if you turned up in a badger suit, then we would have to find someone to dress up as a mushroom and someone to dress up as snake. Or is the Badger suit to be used for the Badger Parade.

Badger parade? Actually, another* excuess I'd use even if* I got a costume, would be 'oh, its summer, I'll be far too hot... what a lot of hastle...'

How can you not know the badger parade? Freak!

aww, how disapointing , that would of made the summer meet so much more eventful.