h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

though it might wash a way a good chunk of your bulk, and lighten your color a lot. You're not naturally mud-brown, I assume?

accually...
cheers
soon to be dead ford

well, wont that be a releif.




(assuming you *are* naturally mud brown,(is anybody?) I bet your natural skin doesn't flake off in cakes that smell remarkably like Nevadan dirt. At any rate, I cant guage your skin color under all that crumbly stuff.)

uh, im reaaaallllyyyy tan, and my skin IS flaking off... funny you should mention it!
cheers
soon to be dead ford

right. I knew that. you're persian.
Its flaking off because you got under running water for the first time in about 3 years. Just keep under there until it all comes off.

ya, but, im flaking cuz sunburns! ow ow ow... oh well, i came out better than some!
cheers
hates my stupid computer! ford

Of course, for Ford, heavy exercise is lifting a television remote. I've never seen anybody break out in a hog-sweat before... But Ford has the funk goin' on.

Leo, if you stay under the shower head too long, you may lose a couple of body parts. How long have you had leprosy, anyway? Last time you gave somebody the finger, you really did give them a finger.

And here is Lentilla. Cant tell a hog from a horse. Explains some of that bad breakfast bacon.
Hogs dont sweat.

yup! a 400 lb remote can make you sweat!
and if leo has leaprasy, then im mary queen of scotts!
and you have to come off your fear of the shower... its only water! itll help with the smell!
cheers
ford

how can you be so sure...?

42 (ignore me im on an oxygen high right now*

forget it! One thing at at time! First teach her to read so she can read labels and recipes. OH, and the difference between a horse an a hog.

cuz i have taken a shower dum dum!... dude, please close your door! or put deoderent on!
cheers
deis... FORD

hold on... can you define the differences between a shower and mud bath?

acually i can! its suprizing you guys can tell the diff between your faces and the toilett!
cheers
ford

The mud is what you bathe in, and the shower is the occasioanl thing you get when you step outside when there's water coming down from the sky...

NURR!
cheers
ford

toilet face yourself, Ford.
Hey tiger, you're supposed to insult *other* people, not make a target out of yourself.

Oh, that was your face someone just...er...SAT on?


never would have guessed...

How do you do too....

YOU sat on it! I wont discuss the trauma of the experience, but... I've been sat on by better creatures.