h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You lie!

I'd like to add
Ghostbusters II - not even funny for a 2 year old
Schindler's list - just plain boring
Harry Potter - what can i say, i have a grudge (he steriotypes all that is 'geek')

Can i just add that i feel INCREDIBLY sorry to ANYONE bearing the name H. Potter

Harry Potter is a k***head...if he was real I'd whup him with his own f***ing broomstick, the smarmy little c***!

Well done that man

I'm no hero, I just like smacking kids with broomsticks.

About what do I lie?

Oh, and Orcus, you can't dispense with horror as a genre.
1) You're actually running out of films to watch with all these genres you keep dumping
2) You'd lose all the following-Nosferatu, The Golem, The Vampyre, Dr Mabuse, Dracula, Frankenstein, The Bride of Frankenstein, The Mummy, The Invisible Man, The Creature from The Black Lagoon, The Creature Walks Among Us, the career of William Castle, Vincent Price, Peter Cushing, Christopher Lee, Dracula, Frankenstein, The Mummy (Hammer), Witchfinder General, Night, Dawn and Day of the Dead, Evil Dead 1, 2, 3...
And that's just of the top of my head!

In actual fact, if you must pick another genre, why not pick the one that actually delivers least to fans and general public, that has rarely, if ever produced a major step forward in cinema techniques or styles, and has surely produced more BAD movies per buck than any other. Science Fiction.

Noo noo noo - The Action Movie, or The Event Movie surely vie for the worst genre. How many good action movies are there, i mean REALLY good - Die Hard... and i'm stumped from there!

Depends on how you translate the term Action movie.
Die hard is actually pretty pathetic as far as I'm concerned-but the HK movies of John Woo, Speed, Face/Off, any number of Jackie Chan movies, most of the cinema of HK, Crouching Tiger..., well i could go on, but I have to go out.

I did think about Crouching Tiger, but dismissed it because i felt it's period and martial arts bent precluded it.

John Woo? It's amusing one, but i've never seen any real value in his shoot em ups. HK cinema revolves around Wong Kar Wei for me.

While were in an oriental frame of mind why are you raising the red lantern, and have you seen the film?

Wong Kar Wei is a *fantastic* film maker.
If you can't see any value in HK movies, then why Die Hard, which was merely the frist US movie to import HK film making techniques wholesale?

Le lantern rouge is the name of the back marker in the Tour de France. Nothing to do with the movie which is fine in a dull and worthy sort of way.

Critters IV (I loved the first two, third was OK... HATED the last one.)

Barton Fink (A friend hyped it for two hours before showing it to me. I started snoring half an hour in because I couldn't find a single engaging feature in the whole premise.)

Enemy Mine (Had high expectations; it turned out to be a sci-fi equivalent of an afternoon matinee TV movie, and it was too late to get a different movie out. Tried watching it again after ten years, still hated it.)

Ran (I'm a Kurosawa fan, but I couldn't get into that one at all. All I remember is two grouos of samuri on different mountains filmed in long shot from a third mountain, and an excess of talking. It's a Shakespeare adaptation, and I don't enjoy Shakespeare either...)

Anything filmed entirely from the viewpoint of a toddler ('nuff said...)

The Innocent (Kelsay Grammer co-stars with a blonde, freckly, autistic 5-year-old american kid who's supposed to be the only witness to a murder. Comes across as "Frasier does a cop movie" - the only thing missing to make it complete would be a tagline to the effect of "the harrowing true story of one woman's courage"... )

Any film with a tagline containing the phrases "true story", "one woman's courage" or "life-affirming". (Again, 'nuff said.)

(With the "any film that..." entries, that should cover at least ten turkeys... )

Anyone who doesn't like Barton Fink is a dung-eating ignoramus.
Why don't you go home, stick on "Speed 2" and leave real films alone.

Morning, 1mantw.
bad weekend was it?

My roommate had borrowed Fear And Loathing in Las Vegas. I dozed off a few times during the movie, but I don't think it would have made any more sense if I hadn't. Bad movie.

morning blue dude.
Yes, cack weekend.
And the book of Fear and Loathing is a classic but the film was misjudged...and it could have been so f***ing good.

Gilliam is allowed one clanger in amongst all the gems he regularly produces, surely?

Yeah, I'll let him off...but Fear and Loathing was never something he should have gone near, it relies on reality too much for Gillo's flights of fancy...the whole point of Fear and Loathing is that it is reality is more twisted when sober than when on drugs.
Ah well, better luck next time Tezza! (or not as the case may be, his next project about Don Quixote got shut down three weeks into it, he MUST be the unluckiest film maker going, poor chap!)