Abandon all hope, ye who enter here

Keeper of the ones that got away

"When the revolution comes, it will not come terrible, as an army with banners, but as a corporation dustman, tidying away the rubbish of the age" - Brendan Behan.

NORMAL SERVICE WILL BE RESUMED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

My PC is dogfood so i'm operating out of work, where i don't get no time on the office confuser. Until i'm sorted, transmissions will be limited!

And i don't have the freetime i used to (I used to have freetime?!?) as it's all eaten up by The Moo. Who is quite lovely.

No more the teacher, once again the student. I have left the world of work for the world of... even more work actually. I always used to deride my students telling them they had life easy and they had loads of time to get on with whatever i had to set them. However now the boot is on the other hoof i'm bushed.

I've also got all of Douglas Adams' books read by him on mp3 recently - but when i try to transfer them to .wav files it trims ten seconds or so off the end. Quoi? Any help with this could result in free DA cd's. Anyone with a passion for DNA check out my Douglas Adams-ography below.

Meanwhile back in the World Wide World...

Anyone wishing to catch up with me will be able to find me here:

Half Man Half Buscuit Sheffield Boardwalk May Richard E. Grant Norwich Literary Festival Thursday 6 April Jo Brand Grimsby Auditorium 22nd March Buzzcocks UEA, Norwich Monday 13th March The Shortwave Set Arts Centre, Norwich 10th March Lucy Porter Arts Centre, Norwich 2nd March Jeffrey Lewis Waterfront, Norwich Wednesday 22nd February Money Can't Buy Music Rescue Rooms, Nottingham 15th February Jeffrey LewisArts Centre, Norwich Monday 9th February Half Man Half Buscuit Derby First Floor Club Thursday February 2nd Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds Corn Exchange, Cambridge Tuesday January 31st

So i've had my first exhibition - Within These Walls. Which was on at three venues over three weeks, with all the attendant hassle, pubicity, hard work and surprises that must always go with putting on a show. Suprisingly it went down really well.

So as you can see above the Jazz Cigarettes have been out and about a little over these last few months, and going down really well - there's a selection of tracks available to download on the tasty website above.

Les Overend has finally come back to the Nunny Records stable too. Presenting me with "The Roar of the Greasepaint and the Smell of the Crowd" last week, five years it's been promised, and i'd built it up to immense proportions in my mind, but nothing could prepare me for it. A work of trammeled genius. I hope to realse something by Les and something by his new band WWX (World War 10) as somepoint in the future.

OLD HAT

"I'm in and out of hospital at the moment. Seems i've got to have a kidney removed. Bugger. So i'm not going to be around much for a few weeks, but i can't stand counting the cieling tiles in the ward for too long, and i'll probibly try to break out every now and again."

NEW HAT

It's nine months on and i've near as dammit been given the all clear on the old kidney front. I had my last visit to the consultant last week. Which is a bit odd really. I have an apointment in six months, but if i've had no trouble with it i'm to just ring 'em and tell 'em i'm not coming. Strang to have such a major op and life shift thingy, then for it all to be over within a year.

I had a bit of a funny turn as i sat in the consultants waiting room. The sign on the wall says "If you have been waiting more than twenty minutes please tell a member of the nursing staff" - everyone there had been waiting for two hours before they went in. But as i sat there i thought about my kidney - or lack of it - and while i've often pondered upon the little hollow in my back that forms where the organ used to be when i lay down, and the scar that aches a little sometimes - this time, possibly for the first time i started thinking about the new bits - the bionic bits, the plasic ducting and stuff that replaces my removed kidney. And i had a bit of a funny turn.

Obviously i have thought about it before, i understood the op before i had it, i've explained to others the nature of the pyloplasty dozens of times, but this time, all of a sudden, it just struck me what that meant. I had a thing inside me, where no thing should be, that was now a part of me, forever.

And i've got a new hat too.

Anyone at the Eddie Izzard gig the other night will have seen me in it. Very toasty.

Oh, and hello dorothymorrissey

"Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, were on this earth to fart about" - Kurt Vonnegut

"If i can't dance it's not my revolution." - Emma Goldman.

"And in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love you make." - The Beatles

NORMAL SERVICE WILL BE RESUMED

AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

Is it Giro day Tom?

"Where there is a lower class, i am in it, while there is a criminal element i am of it, While there is a soul in prison, i am not free." - Eugene Victor Debs "War is over - if you want it" - John Ono Lennon In spite of everything, i still believe that people are really good at heart - Anne Frank Disobedience is the origonal virtue - Oscar Wilde Don't Punch the Clock - Punch the Boss "That which you possess, possesses you" -Friedrich Nietzsche "If i can't dance it's not my revolution" - Emma Goldman "There's nothing dirty that two people can do, or three people, or one person; the only dirty thing you can do to a body is hurt it or kill it" - Lenny Bruce "Women don't need the vote - they need arming" - Agatha Christie "Let me say, at the risk of seeming ridiculous, that the true revolutionary is guided by feelings of great feelings of love" - Ernesto Che Guevara Feed the World - Eat the Rich "Circling the Earth in the Orbital Spaceship, i marvelled at the beauty of the planet, 'People of earth let us safeguard and protect this beauty - not destroy it' I said." - Yuri Gagarin: On His First Words From Space

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the autist formerly known as flinch

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