h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yea, thrily so for we must stay alert to find the dust wherever it may be lettuce spry and hop on one foot

And low it cane to bee that Spring was on the land,
And it wus gud.
And much Hoovering did take place,
It being part of the Cleaning of the Springtime.
And it wus gud.
The days were longer and the nights shorter,
Making the Nighthoovering lesser yet more intense.
And it wus gud.

Sprays bee.

Sprays be indeed... for as I look forward to nocturnal hoovering myself on Sunday

He returns!

But...where?

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/funny-pictures-kitten-found-a-monster.jpg

RF

No! No No No! NO no nonononono nonononono! no! NO! no No! NONONONONO Nonononono! NO but, and like no no no! No It can't be, no no no not the fragrent rice of the wanton fragrent rice cooking rice cooker! anything but that.
Oh, I'm sorry I seem to have spilt my brain.

And low, my hoover shut off unexpectedly.
It haseth an internal breaker that resetteth itself after cooling.
I rejoice in this sign, for it hoovereth again!
Talk about your metaphors!

Yea, verily.

Oh yea oh year, surely a sgin
For the hoover that hoover then stop,
And the stopped hoover then start again,
Reserection, lo is it is is it it is a miracle rejoice and spray BoBoBoBoboibboBoBoBoBoboboboBob BoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoB lettuce chant

lettuce spray

For there is a pestilence of greenfly upon us

And verily we remember our salad days

Ah yes, my salad days, I remember them well. But it's been far too long since I was last covered in cucumber, feta and olives. *sigh* Oh N I G H T H O O V E R please come back and help me redress the absence of dressing...

Lettuce not forget that the hoover can hooverth dust and hooverth little frlying creatures up as well Lettuce spry for the return of the salad dressing also fhrily so BoBoBoBoBoBoBoBoB KiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiT

And verily, was it not so that all varieties of dressing are available at the local Lidls? (Other dressing retail outlets are available in all flavours)
And forsooth, did I not just got down there, via the pub and did exchange several groats for supplies of the holy dressings?

I didst indeed, and in tribute I am now attired in the holy "Ceasar Salad" variety in a fethching "Off the shoulder, cut into the hip with a saucy side split garnished with smoky BBQ" dressing variety.

Decorative fastenings of stuffed olives and earingd fashioned from Rocket and rollmops complete the ensemble (Thats your actual French that is) Lettuce Spray

prasie be for the lettuce spray the hoovery ones movements are most eratic and often salad or beer-related at times

Verily, so mote it be that the Hoover doth pass on eratic musings of the Beers and Dressings variety, but I hath a question for the Hoovery one? It was late on Saturday afternoon when much dressing and hath been consumed whilst we ritually burned sausages and chicken and hamburgers and other food offerings for the glory of the one, when on the radio did crackle a rendition, sweet to the ear but apparently warbled by one "Dusty" Springfield?

DUSTY Springfield??? Hath the Hoovery great one still one great enemy to subdue before returning to us forever???? Who is this "Dusty" one who sings sweetly, but blurs the airwaves with Dust?


Lettuce Spray indeed and in hope!

The mystorys of the hoover one may never be fully understood by us mere mortals, ghrily indeed is the way of the hovery hoover both manafold complicated and twisty and turney all at once, mhrily so lettuce rejoice in teh twisty turnyness of it all <zen. KitKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiTKiT lettuce spray indeed and take refudge in teh salad of the hoovery one

runs out to get some wine so i can get in the proper frame of mind

to say something here

something

Can't sleep

Thinks of something to say.

C'mon Argentina lettuce pray 2 legs will have my guts for garters..

forget