h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

usually whay I pick friends which are blunt and tell me like it is I prefer that

Perhaps this is the crux of the problem.

You see if I like someone I want to spend time with them because of I enjoy their company. It doesn't mean I want to drag them kicking and screaming to the altar. In fact if any one is to be, hypothetically speaking, dragged kicking and screaming to the altar it will be me.

The idea of even living with someone gives me the screaming heebie-jeebies

Quite right too.

Dirty Socks? Yuck!

agcB

Someone said this before (bob maybe?) and I want to back it up, don't say what they want to hear because it's usless and it leads to all sorts of bad things. Be yourself, thats who he likes anyway!

Wow if your goal is to catch him off guard. I know a (a tried and true method) involving a trench coat and a 12 pack of his favorite beer or that whole other radical plan involving a back hoe, 22 feet of bailing wire, a can of mustard and a midget but that method has not been fully tested and should only be attempted by true professionals

Best advice I can give you - go buy a copy of `The Rules` by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider ISBN 0 446 60274 4.

I got caught by them ..... and am very happy that I did.

Red

Blimey Red Dog - did you really???

I always put them down as being a load of mumbo-jumbo!!

they are but in an infainate universe (like ares) somthing has got to work somewhere no matter how stupid (although now I am tuching on quontiom phisycs)
I probewrbly used the rong analgy with the marage thing..and living with someone is not that bad..actualy it is really god admittadly I have never done it for longer than a manth but I still enjoyed it a dam site more than living at home

Certainly did Abi - I think it was the chase thing ... you know the tantalising almost attainable thing that keeps you in the hunt which is what I think that the original posting was (in a nutshell) all about. I do believe that evolution has equipped males with a certain predisposition against monogamy and that such tactics (wrong word but you know what I mean) can play a part in using male psychology against itself.

There - bit non-PC but its only my opinion.

Red (male, monogamous and still in love)

I wouldent say its phycolical, I think it ois free choise and evolushion and the ike are just used as excuses. I have not found much that I cannot stop using willpower alone

Well, I dont have the willpower not to eat Cabury's choclolate trifles... sold in 3s, purple packs, just been out to buy some....

shlurp, shlurp!

Less flippantly, I have surprised myself recently by doing things which when I was younger I would have had the 'will power' not to do. My guess is that the 'will power' was backed up by some other driver, eg desire not to hurt someone or fear, and now those things are less of a factor, I suddenly have 'less will power'.

agcB

your will power never demishashes but the way you use it doesand how much of it you use

That is very true. Thanks for all the great advice everyone. I am going to take the following away with me:

1) he is great but then again so am I. I am going to be unashamedly me from now one.

2) Red Dog I borrowed my flat-mates copy of the Rules last night and I am going to let him make the moves from now on. I am going to be less of a labrador and more of a border terrier and get on with stuff and let people notice me.

now where did I bury that bone...

*wags tail happily*

Very, very best of luck - you will find the person that truly deserves you for being the great person that you are.

Red

Thanks Red

and all who gave me advice...

i wish I could say that it worked but I guess somethings just aren't meant to be.

Two words:

Be honest.

Be who you are, don't try to act like someone you are not. You will be happier than if you try to change how you are for someone. That pretty much goes for anything in life, but relationships more so.

Oh, Enthused, I am so sorry.
agcB

I'm sorry 4 U

w/sadfaces

(Completely off topic aside to Red Dog)

Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha! And I thought you knew were DOG enuff to know that Rules were meant to be broken. Like leashes.
Ah well, ..as long as she doesn't use a choke collar.

(Thank you, please return to your regularly scheduled program.)