h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Aerol stood back and began to regard the unfolding scene with interest.

BluesSlider...it won't hurt a bit. Just let me find the end of the tape and relax. Really...tickling should be the least of your concerns....

*BS closes his eyes and hopes desperately that this is the 'tape the goose feather on the body' variation on 'pin the tail on the donkey'*

Zmrzlina, could you just snap the tape taut in front of you with a malicious grin before you get to work?
Just for the gesture? It looks real mischievous and all. I think.
But then in another forum I admitted to liking to wear sheep.
As clothing. Not wool. Sheep. Sorry if I just sank in stature.

Blueslider..have a seat over here on the little cafe chair while I prepare.

(that is for Pres. Oh...by the way...when is your birthday? I do a mean Marilyn Monroe impersonation)

One thing though, Blueslider...you aren't afraid of heights are you?

--Zmrzlina

Erm,....this isn't going to be 'tape the goose feather on the body' after all, is it? Something a whole lot more dangerous I suppose?

Heights? I get dizzy standing on a chair.

[male] }WHAT!?{

[female] {Do you HAVE to broadcast your thoughts over the entire forum?}

[male] }I always do. What have I told you about reading peoples' minds without permisssion?{

[female] {Beats me. Weren't you listening either?}

[male] }It isn't ethical with enemies, let alone friends! That includes everyone in between.{

[female] {OkAAAAY!}

[male] }Right.{ [to the rest of the forum] }Is there a game that can be adapted for Mewtwos?{

[female] {Hmm ... you ought to teach me that mind blocking trick sometime. It could come in handy.}

Eh, Ioreth, My birthday isn't up for a long time.
But I'm celebrating my new-shoe day today, since I bought new shoes today, and tomorrow is bad-hair-day so take it away, whichever you want

*Sits back to see if Ioreth (who is being massaged by Prez) or Zmrzlina (who made the birthday offer) responds to the Prez's message*

I don't wish to be pedantic, but getting two females confused can be bad for your health Prez.

And...isn't Ioreth *male*? In which case BluesSlider might well consider picking up the cafe chair he is sitting on and use it to ward off the eggs thrown by the aforementioned member.

--Zmrzlina

"Allow me to point out," said Aerol, "that on Ioreth's page SHE says that SHE is a girl."

Ah yes...got the X/Y chromosome bit all mixed up. Sorry Ioreth.

So confused now...but sex is of little matter after all.

I thought that sex was the subject of this forum ... or is having sex violating the unwritten rule that Forums Can't Stay On Topic?

You know, I once saw a T-shirt that said "Too sexy for this shirt" on the front.

Oh dear...I think this has all gotten just too muddled. The word "sex" in my previous post, my dear YK, etc., refers to male/female and not the act of intercourse. And it's all my fault for calling BluesSlider on a false gender identification which was in fact true and now we are all just too muddled to go on. See...I was right...sex is like this forum. When it goes on too long, it loses its passion.

--Zmrzlina

I'm too sexy for the shirt I'm wearing now, but everyone can tell that already. They don't need a statement.

-Fenchurch M. Mercury
Putting the "lack of" back into "humility"

There was also one that said, "Just do me" with the Nike swish thingy below it.

Hmm ... shirt sex. Interesting...

I don't know who to throw the chair at now. But I am quite definitely female (got a little reminder last night!) I don't sing very well, Pres, so I'll let Zmrzlina do the honors. But the whole duct tape bit sounded interesting...

[C-3PO impersonation] It wasn't my fault, sir -- erm, madam! Please don't deactivate me! I wasn't one of the people who confused your gender!

[not C-3PO impersonation] By the way, I'm reading Lord of the Rings. I haven't gotten to the bit with Ioreth yet.

[Cut to Carol Cleveland in that alluring boudoir, oozing with sex and all that stuff.]

[Carol: (miming to very masculine sounding voice-over) "Good evening. In a moment, Mewtwo will give us a few words on the subject of abstinence. But first a bit of fun."]

[Cut to eight-second striptease. Then cut to the male and female Mewtwos, embracing each other. Superimposed caption: "A FEW WORDS ON ABSTINENCE"]

[male] }Forget it!{ [starts kissing the female]

Fenchurch, humility never got anyone anywhere. No shirt would be sexy enough for you. LOL
Ioreth, most definitely female. I thought we'd established this earlier.
Mew (Two), Carol Cleveland is an excellent choice! Much nodding of heads!