h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*dumps Anole into the ocean* Have a nice... voyage! See you next... ... that one season with the... leaves dropping off of trees... Winter?

*climbs up the rudder and reboards the ship. Gives EC a menacing glare then thwacks EC with his tail and dumps him 50 feet behind the ship*

im still waiting for peet

Who?</>

I don't even have fifty feet! Where am I going to find that kind of appendage in those numbers!

You are well away from the ship.

Oh foolish foolish sibling/brother/thingamabob! What need for a well do we? We're on the good yellow submarine titanic starship! Or pirate ship! We're surronded by water and thusly do not need a well.

You are over 15 meters from the ship.

Oh Faulkner. He done got REAL specific on me. In that case I'll just have to ignore the laws of physics until he shuts up.

BAH!!
*thwacks EC*

*ahem* *horribly imitates Anole's voice* "You were over fifteen meters away from the ship! Waahhhh! I love logic!"

Hah! Pizownzizzled by your own words! They betray you like so much tissue paper

You are defying logic and physics so technically I can still thwack you.

Technically not. I refuse to be thwack'd so thwack'd I shall unremain. The real question here is: Did I fire five shots or six? D'you feel lucky? Well, do ya? Punk!

Pirate pistols are single shooters

Why in the name of cowboy Jesus and the latter day amoebas would I be using a flintlock pistol? Foolish bird! I am the great Leon! ... *climbs into Arwing* A winner is me! *crashes into the sun*

*Arwing spontaniously explodes*

Exploding due to sun-crashing-into can't really be said to be spontaneous. Yarr.

Don't forget to fall.

I did who to the what now?