h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Welcome to the Atelier. This place is a locus for varied and interesting conversation -- how wide-ranging becomes clear when you look at the reprise of our previous discussions below. If you haven't been here before, please have a look at A304354. That's the forum home page for the atelier; there you'll find out who and what we are, how we work, where we virtually are, and what the ground rules of netiquette are.

All thanks to the scribes who volunteered to help me out in this most recent thread: Wandering Albatross, Ben and David B. For them we have tee shirts, a bottle of their favorite wine, a small round of Leicestershire's finest cheddar and, of course, the traditional quill pen. *Chloe steps up with gift baskets for each of the scribes* Once more the scribes have generated such literate and literary notes that no work was needed to include them in our introduction.

Special Award for best link goes to Santragenius for letting us know about the Extreme Sheepherding video at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2FX9rviEhw . *Chloe hands Santra a small box containing a pair of gold cuff links*

And then we have this never-before awarded prize for Creative Theft, for David B., who recently stole The Pirates of Penzance.
http://www.thisiskent.co.uk/canterb.../article-780588-detail/article.html
*Chloe presents David with a second tee shirt, horizontal black and white stripes, flat cap and black mask* Congratulations on a top-notch performance!

The winner of the fuzzy blue mohair pants for this conversation goes to Jau'emne, who contrived to appear long after the thread should have been completed, at post 2865. An extraordinary feat of last-ness!


And now we begin the Official Recollection of Conversation 97X.

1st LED Roll of Honour

Teuchter (FTTF)
Santra
Kelli
Wandering Albatross
Titania
Marv
Thinker
Phil
Irv
Ben
FG
Bald Bloke
Witty Moniker
David B

~~~~~

Hypatia
GDZ
Todaymueller
Br. Magwitch
Amy Paper Lady
minichessemouse
Gw7en
Irv
egon (42)
MR
Bookmouse
Mol
Mr. Dreadful
Mysterious Stranger (or perhaps not)
Z
Solnushka
Beatrice
d'Elaphant
ltp
Runescribe
Rosemary

Ottox
sea
Agapanthus
lostmonalisa
Happy Nerd
Bagpuss

(after this your hostess did not keep such close track, except to watch for potential blue panthood)



Lil launched the good news of the conversation by getting her wonky legs at least temporarily de-gumby-fied by a doctor.
We continued to discuss different flavors for crisps.
ltp tartly reminded the hostess that he had appeared in the last thread at post 2108, but left Bald Bloke to wear the furry mohair trews anyway. That's all right, ltp. We'll catch you later.
Gw7en got a tattoo.

=========500-1000 - David B ========

The weather, as ever, was a topic of discussion, with snowfall reported in various Salonista locations across the globe, and speculation about the possibility of performing a snow dance for those feeling left out. The advantages and disadvantages of ABS in cars with regards to inclement weather were also pondered..

On the food front, various celebrity chefs were discussed, and Salonistas shared methods of poaching eggs with or without useful implements, paper towels or Hail Marys. Protestant and secular equivalents for the Hail Mary as a timing device were discussed. We discovered that eggs are good for your health. Then they were bad for us. Then good again. We lost track eventually...

Valentine's Day came and went with varying degrees of success and celebrated (or not) in many different ways. It was generally agreed that birthdays and anniversaries are more important, but an extra excuse for spending time with one's beloved is a Good Thing. The Salonistas attempted to talk like gangsters in honour of the St. Valentine's Day massacre.

The word 'lief' was used in an Ellis Peters book which Titania was reading, prompting various definitions of it and a musing on the value of archaic words. The meaning of 'catholic' with a small c also came up later.

Z was presented with a cake. This was, in context, a bad thing, which is unusual where cake is concerned. Conversation drifted from cake to quesadillas and other Mexican food.

Irv slept on the sofa for a Very Long Time.

Zagreb and lanzababy passed through the Salon.

Hyp was flooded twice in one day, one of those times being caused by the plumber who came to fix the first flood.

Salonistas offered condolences to GDZ, as his grandmother passed away.

Other topics of conversation included the physical and mental health of the Salonistas and our loved ones (not particularly good in most cases), ritual and religious observance, red tape (the NHS appears to have been taking lessons from Kafka), Pastafarianism, sleeplessness, Google streetview, the Nicene creed and Hyp's impending trip to the UK.

========= 1000-1500 - Ben ==========

This section of posts began and ended with funerals. At the start of the section, GDZ was preparing to go to his grandmother's funeral, which Marv later wrote about very movingly, describing a solitary white bird flying about in the sunshine. At the end of the section Marv then had to go to California, where his mother's sister had died. However, in the midst of death we welcomed new life, as Kenna Grace, aka Notepad, Amy's new baby arrived and was baby-showered with atelierish gifts.

*falls into step beside David so that we can transfer the baton without fumbling*

Towards the end of the previous section we were discussing the street view in google maps, (something that does not seem yet to have arrived in the UK), and pleasure was being taken in the earlier mornings and the later nights. It's good to be on a planet that tilts.

*holds on to baton firmly as her hand is brushed by feathers as the Owl gently lets go and flies away*

Job interviews featured quietly but insistently throughout the conversation, first Rosemary, then Z and the Thinker. Health too has been a drum-beat: Lil's legs continued to be unreliable and SpaceCadette's biopsy results were pending. Minicheesemouse has to monitor herself for a month to make sure that what she has really is asthma, bookmouse is likely to have a pacemaker in the near future, and Runescribe has agreed with the university authorities that it is best if she spends the rest of the year getting better.

By far the bulk of the conversation was about food. Titania, or at least the hotel chain she works for, is getting in to bed with the nekkid chef, and this took us in the direction of cookery books. (My cook-books are kookier than your cook-books). It seems most of us go to the internet to check recipes despite the risk (as lanzababy put it) of getting wine in the keyboard. These days our cookery books seem to be more for reading than cooking. Lil has a book by "Fanny Farmer". (Sounds a funny job. Pimp yo Food!) But Runescribe trumped us with her father's recipe for stock which begins "Take bones etc. of victim..." (I worry about "etc"). And several hundred posts later, Lentilla trumped even that with a recipe for cooking possum which involves feeding the beast on milk and cereals for 10 days before dispatching it. Besides such eclecticism our discussion of salt (too much? too little? not enough?) seems rather mundane.
From essential books it was but a preview and a post to Essential Ingredients. It seems that we have online friends for a reason: in cyberspace no-one can smell our onion-breath! Oh, and we all use so much garlic that the Atelier is entirely secure from vampires. The food conversation then strayed though sustainable stock-rearing, halal and kosher butchery, and growing one's own veg.
Our conversation about Gumbo and the pros and cons of Okra interwove with policemen, pigs and Lentilla's animal masks, and segued into sustainable leather and sustainable farming, and thence to ethical eating in general, and the pros and cons of Nestle in particular, and thus to breast-feeding both in the third world and the west, and thence to the dilemmas involved in feeding children, and indeed in having them. From nekkid chefs to rug-rats in 500 easy posts.

We did manage to touch on other topics besides food, but not in such detail. Magwich gave us a spider to play with:
http://www.onemotion.com/flash/spider/
We had an insight into LARPery, because Runescribe's character died, and she prepared and began to play a new one. Meanwhile, Marv participated in a paint-ball recreation of Iwo Jima but still finds the 600 bowling score eludes him and FG went winter camping. We considered the pros and cons of circumscision and we discussed fertility and whether there's an optimal age to have children, concluding that there probably isn't.

We finished the section discussing sexual apartheid and the challenges (and costs) of being single in social situations and when travelling, and the last few posts were about bossiness within the family and how our relationships with our siblings change - and don't change - as we grow up.

*Runs the last few pages good and steady, and feels WA's wing tips brush by she passes over the baton again*

========== 1500-2000 WA ============

Swooping down from a great height the Albatross picks up the quill tossed in the air by Ben.

Marv is in Las Vegas heading for Santa Monica and a rendezvous with Sea while Lanzababy reminisced on odd names and The Thinker on Atlantas.

Hyp, Witty, lostmonalisa and Ben mussed on being single, the benefits or not of visiting galleries and museums. Eating alone and pubs was definitely a no go but Hyp liked the freedom to spend, especially to travel and visit the UK corner of her empire.

Teuchter, IR and FG turned us towards families, including looking forward to J returning from China, complete with snore. FG stopped us in our tracks by being an only child and the youngest of seven and the oldest of three. For her next trick…

Minicheesemouse managed to hand a report in on time while Santra and Lentilla took different views on eating and drinking alone. Meanwhile Sol was the last to be picked for the yummy mummy nappy team.

Teuchter, Z and Ben took Runscribe under their collective wing as she struggled with life and uni while Lil won a gold at shoe putting on and resisting internet diagnoses supported by FG and Irv.

Todaymueller went jamming while the rest of us started googlenosing various complaints including Irv’s painful private. Lml advised Anoldgrey to change his diet to green veggies and away from white food to prevent his arteries clogging up and Taff weighed in with grilled bacon and olive oil before adding a splash of blood from his broadsword. Phil reassured us about his cholesterol level.

Ben started bobbing and weaving and Kelli thought a touch of purple would set off the black and white. On his birthday Santra announced he was attending the Nodnol meet.

Lanza turned the colour knob to pink but didn’t see that everybody’s face would be turning deep pink when Ag titillated us with tales from the Kama Crampra and her comings and goings. Ben hung a prurient label on us all while Lil recommended doing it on horseback. Hyp said she was getting excited, about the meet, yeah we believed her.

Highways and byways gripped us all: Hyp loosed her screws before turning into a country lane, Lost became a lost back road, FG a tree lined boulevard, Ben a canal towpath and Teuchter a wooden, whoops, un-metalled country lane. Tod chillied his nose before choosing an overgrown path, Lanza BOATed and Sol took herself off to a Lake District footpath. Witty went around the bend with an interesting lazy river and Santra morphed into a forest path but Lil trumped us all with Nogal Pass. Space was a posh canal path in Venice. Titania wanted the peace and quiet of a traffic free street while Rosemary slinked around the back streets of Venice, but BB went nowhere.

Thoughts turned to lunch, Hyp had pork, Tod beef and Yorkshire, Lil pizza and GDZ had the pastor. Meanwhile Bea and Anold went on diets to attack the avoir dupois. David B donned his pirate costume and stretched his range over three octaves and Runscribe hit the top notes in Japanese.

Jobs and the lack of them hit the Salonistas with MR, Rosemary’ Gwen and Thinker searching, Ag and Hyp meanwhile clasped their jobs to their bosoms.

Lil finally began to get a handle on her mobility problem with a suspected herniated disk which was a lot less scary than some options but Mags got a nasty rash and Zagreb developed a mystery bruise. Kelli went for a scan.

We all celebrated Santras and FG’s birthdays and sniggered at Ben’s interesting prezzie with slot in attachment provided by Kelli, fortunately Sol’s oil eased the path. Bea yearned for black lace stockings but got a 25 Edited Entry badge.

Pets, their ailments and the costs kept us busy before Spring began to sprung all over the place; daffs, crocuses and green grass poking through, globe cypresses greening, cherries blossoming and snowdrops and erantis blooming.

Santra was entertained by singing waiters and Ben had her blog bigged by a bigger blogger and GDZ wopped Marv.

To round off Ag had a rant about the NHS but calmed down with communal cocoa and rum that soothed us all, GDZ defied the dentist by doing it in the chair and Hyp went hyper as FedEx furiously frustrating failure induced the dreaded librarian’s pout.


============2000-2860+ Lil ==========

After your hostess had called in the scribes in anticipation of a new conversation, some new and eminently discussable topics were introduced. Following a question about King John from Sol and a typically erudite answer from MR, MR wondered which historical figure salonistas would most like to go to the pub with. Answers were all over the historical timeline.

A fire broke out and ravaged several hundred acres of pasture and riverside land uncomfortably close to Lil, but was brought under control the same day. She later posted a link to pictures of the fire fighting as taken by a neighbor.

As gardening broke out among the salonistas, Hypatia got her veggies planted and launched yet another new exhibit at her library, albeit minus several display panels.

Various salonistas not in their teens discovered that they can no longer perform acrobatic movements.

As the systole-diastole of job-hunting continued, Kelli asked the world why were sponge cakes kept turning out dry. All sorts of tips (from the Americans not necessarily related to sponge cakes) poured in. Cake-making thoughts led to what to have for breakfast -- cake? pancakes? pie?

GDZ sat for engagement photos and bought the prezzies for best men -- so many rituals even for modern weddings! lostmonalisa reminded us all that it would have been Douglas Adams' 57th birthday, and the salon enjoyed (in somewhat muted fashion) a cake in his honor.

Marv announced his intention to visit a niece in Hong Kong, his first trip to Asia, while egon returned from a holiday in North Carolina. Magwitch got a new pc and met Vista. Kelli got deeply involved in children's party logistics.

Night skies were compared; comparatively few of us get to look at the Milky Way at night. Lil's landlady's heart and its travails led to discussion of stents and surgery, with learned contributions from Z. Facebook members learned about a creative group, Random Album Covers, from Ben -- http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=52483098321

Gw7en went dancing and her troupe did a presentation; we await the Youtube version.

And then somehow we got to talking about ironing, and, unbelievable, on of Santra's comments on the matter of his daughter doing the ironing was moderated. Permanently. The upside of this is that salonistas now have a new euphemism for... well, underage ironing. We still don't understand how that remark was disappeared when Ben's much franker reminiscence of lodgers and ironing was left to stand.

We also talked about worms.

Hypatia was companionably re-united with Syn.

And here is the usual list of stray topics that also committed drive-by discussion:

favorite Pratchett novels
sound systems and headphones
The Prince Albert piercing
carrier bags of recycled materials
St. Patricks Day comestibles
favorite mystery light reading
Red Nose Day
language learning



And now here we are watching for Vikings; a party of sarong-clad salonistas plus Irv in his Serbian hat have gone down to the beach to intercept an invasion. The rest of us are watching nervously.

The samovar is freshened, the IIEM polished and fresh cinnamon buns are available at the butler's hatch. Please make yourselves at home!

Wow, already?

Few made it

Hi all!!

oooh, oooh, did I make the first page!

Off to read the scribing now...

Am slow today...

*lands with a bump*

WHEEEEEEEEE!



::bumps into a potted plant in the corner::

*careers in, carefully placing cleaning cloth beside the sofa.

*slides into the first LED and crashes into a serverbot*

*Crashes into Hyp.*

*Matina brings Titania an Irish coffee in a FTTF mug*

Spray paint would probably suit me better...

Okay, now that I've properly read the summary of the last conversation, all around, scribes!

[p]

Excellent scribing, one and all. *Joins in the *

[Stretches into the new thread]

*puts toe in new thread, then goes back to read the scribing*

*flies in, enjoys the scribing and admires his new T-shirts*

*wonders whether he needs to hide again, but feels quite brave*

[mr]