h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Good to see you too, RB! IIEM, I'll have a large espresso, please, thanks.

*toasts RB with raised cup*

Oops. Better get mine. IIEM Redbeard's Brew, please.

*Toasts ox in return with his mug.*

Oops, just realized I have to be elsewhere.
*downs coffee and leaves*

*almost bumps int RB on his way out the door*

Oops! Bye, RB!

Good morning all. Is there a possibility of getting soemthing VERY strong today? I'm absolutely wiped.

*collapses on a nearby sofa*

*Enters cafŽ, exhausted*

Sorry about being gone a whole day! I hate University red tape! One moment, Cheezdanish...

*Pours two shots of espresso into a mug, fills the rest with organic capulin coffee and mixes well*

If this doesn't wake you up, you're either dead, or immune to caffine!

*grabs steaming cup from Irving, bolts it in one gulp*

*suddenly, funny purple steam shoots out of her ears and with a resounding POP, Cheezdanish turns into a meerkat*

*Pours a c)_( for Ox*
There's another Bluebottle on the guide too, Bumblebee, but he hasn't posted anything anywhere yet. I've lost track of the thousands of Zaphods of different spellings...

The Ford Prefects (and other Prefects and Fords) are numerous, as well, but most of them don't post much. There are no other Irving Washingtons (a Catch-22 reference) but Yossarian (from the same book) is VERY popular. Don't feel bad if your name isn't unique, so long as you are...

Should we worry about what just happened to Cheezdanish?

*High squeeky voice*

No no. I'm fine. I just TURNED INTO A MEERKAT!!! Jeez, Irving. What's in that coffee?

Hello, all!

*does a double take at a somewhat familiar looking meerkat*

Ummm Irv, may I have a cup of Kona, black, please?

*squeeky voice*

Hi Witty! Stay away from the organic stuff, that's my advice to you.

BB, another c)_( please...

*Pours cup of Kona for Witty, then goes to check the Capulin coffee*

Hmmm... the coffee seems fine... better check out the espresso machine

*pours a double shot of espresso, notices an uncharacteristic blue tint to the crema.... pours a little into a planter, watches the nearest flower pull itself out of the ground and run away on legs*

I think the IIEM is acting a bit funny this morning... Oh, here's why, it's set to "mutate"!

Cheezdanish, it may take me a while to figure out how to get you back to your "normal" self.

~Irv

*Pours Titania her c)_(*

Thanks, BB!

*sits down on couch, sipping c)_(, watching Irv's efforts to turn IIEM into un-mutate*

*Takes Kona from Irv, hesitates*

Irv, did the IIEM produce this before or after you adjusted it? Or is only the espresso affected?

*waits for a response before sipping*

*squeeky*

Ok. Hey can I ask you something? Aren't meerkats and orangutangs natural enemies...?

*spins around, nose to nose with Ook*

Ook, it's me, Cheezdanish! Don't do anything silly!!

Ook: "Ook!"

Eek!!

*Ook starts chasing CD around the Cafe.*

Irving! HELP!!!!

*managing to grab hold of Ook, using her Elvish powers*

Ook - calm down, that's just Cheez!

Ook: Ook?

Titania: Trust me!

Ook: OK!

*walks in*

*looks around*

Ook, wouldn't you like to play scrabble with me? it'd be much more fun having a.. a stimulating game of scrabble than just wasting your valuable time chasing a meerkat, wouldn't it??

ooh, & can I have some tea please?

*releasing Ook, who seems to have calmed down, and eager for a game of scrabble with Joanna*

Irv, you've got to do something about that meerkat!