h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Walks in. Notices Lil standing under a chandelier that wasn't there the last time. Motions for Lil to move out from under it, the shoots it with the latest lazer designed by Crater Labs. The chandelier robot drops to the floor, and almost pounces on Affy before another successful blast. Affy orders a Usual*

Lil, don't worry if you hear loud screaming, lazers, and the sounds of vaporizing metal. Some of my robots have been acting odd lately.

*Calmly sips Usual*

What just happened?

*doesn't ask, she doesn't want to know*
Any chance of some lemon tea before I go to bed?

Yep here you go c)~(

~Irving

*understands that her life is probably going to be different from now on*
Very good, Aff. I might have noticed that just now, but with this recent back injury I haven't been looking up. Nice to see you, Joanna.

Oh, no, Lil, you're life won't be much odder than usual. In fact, there's been at least one night of extremely deadly battle between me and some new badly planned project ever since you first started moving into Crater Labs. I soundproofed your level from most of what might come through. I'm just remembering to mention it to you now, that's all. You're life won't be any odder than normal. Than my normal.

*Sips his Usual again*

Your normal is where the Usual is usual!

This is why artists go to strange places unless they're already mad. Creative tension. The Atelier is a perfect site. I know there will be days when I won't have to imagine anything, I'll just sketch whatever races by outside my windows. And there are the moebius doughnuts.

Doobie Doobie doo!

* Just when a lull in conversation strikes, from out of the hallway comes a balding, greasy, sweaty, naked man, running like a man possessed. Beside him his little friend ‘Mr.Nelson’ bobbles up and down excitedly. When he gets to the center of the room he turns to you, ‘wibbling’ & ‘wobbling’ about, whilst jiggling up and down, in what you think to be a strangely erotic way. It’s then you notice smeared on his chest red lipstick proclaiming ‘I Love You !!!’, before he finally runs out another door exposing the ‘smiley’ face on his hairy behind... *

Meanwhile back of the Aroma Cafe.

IIEM Morning Caffine regular dosage please?

IIEM, can I have some Lemon tea?

*takes c)~( and sits in a corner, people watching*

Speaking of streaking, I noticed that Teaserman buzzed Mike A a few days. So that crusade continues.

I'll have an A L Special, please.

Hi Lil, how're you doing??

Joanna, good day! I'm well. Life is interesting, yes?

And I'm putting the c/_V on for a cup of tea.

Could you make mine a Majik tea, please.

*Out of the corner of his eye, notices a jukebox move about an inch to the left. Thinks: I don't remember a jukebox here. Suddenly realizes what is going on. Pulls out the Crater Labs Laser that Affy insisted he carry and blasts the jukebox. Several of the largest pieces start moving towards him. Takes careful aim and blasts each piece. Waits a moment to see if any of the pieces move again. Satisfied, puts away gun.*

Well, I'm glad Affy made me take this laser, after all.

Remind me to cancel that order I put in for a jukebox... wouldn't want it blown to smithereens!

*Ook comes in from porch, gets mop and bucket out of broom closet, and cleans up pieces of jukebox*

Well, a normal jukebox would be fine. But a fugitive robot disguised as a juke box is not a good thing to have around - you never know what it might do. I'm not sure how many more of Affy's errant robots are still on the loose.

*looks around suspiciously at all machinery and fixtures.*