h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ahem, to paraphrase Will Rogers...

"Queues are silly fun, as long as they're happening to someone else".

SC






*one of those spoil-sports who informs queue-cutters that the end is definitely somewhere behind spoil-sport*

Danger Will Rodgers!

*a group of 'pesky kids' run through the store and move the displays around and put all the decaff coffee on the caffinated coffee shelf If it wern't for you pesky kids!

If it weren't for you pesky kids... I'd be awake?

*joins the end of the queue

*searches for money*



*eats queue*

*runs off out of the queue to attempt to find some organic buffalo mozarella

*gets to the front of the queue and then dahses off having remembered that all the fresh produce in the basket is now a year old and out of date

I pushed to the front of a queue once, the man said far queue too.

*goes wild in the isles and then looks to find a queue to join

*stands in queue*

Is this the queue for floral smocks and chunky knits?

err, naa, I think that is on isle 98716 This is teh queue for 8 items or less with payment in coins only

My favourites queues are one that are so long that you form meaningful relationships with they people in front and behind you.
I also like it when they queue is crammed into a small area (like at a theme park), so you end up stood a velvet rope away from someone 1hr ahead of you in the queue.

*nears the front of the queue

*leaves the queue and re-joins it at the back

*leaves the middle of teh queue and goes to the very* back

this is one of the best queues I've ever been in... feels like I've been in it for years now

'Life of Brian' scene 24:

NISUS WETTUS: Next. Crucifixion?

PRISONER #1: Yes.

NISUS: Good. Out of the door. Line on the left. One cross each. Next. Crucifixion?

PRISONER #2: Yes.

NISUS: Good. Out of the door. Line on the left. One cross each. Next. Crucifixion?

MR. CHEEKY: Ah, no. Freedom.

JAILER: Hmm?

NISUS: What?

MR. CHEEKY: Eh, freedom for me. They said I hadn't done anything, so I could go free and live on an island somewhere.

NISUS: Oh. Oh, well, that's jolly good. Well, off you go, then.

MR. CHEEKY: Naa, I'm only pulling your leg. It's crucifixion, really.

NISUS: Oh, ho ho.

MR. CHEEKY: Heh heh heh hehh.

NISUS: I see. Uh, very good. Very good. Well, out of the door. One--

MR. CHEEKY: Yeah. I know the way. Out of the door.

NISUS: Line on--

MR. CHEEKY: One cross each. Line on the left.

NISUS: Line on the left.

MR. CHEEKY: Heh heh.

NISUS: Yes. Thank you. Crucifixion?

PRISONER #4: Yes.

NISUS: Good.


~~~