h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What's the point of beards? Especially the peculiar Frank Zappa / George Michael style which involves shaving some areas and leaving others hairy - isn't it more bother than it's worth?

This idea behind those partial beards sported by the likes of George Michael is something similar to the practise some women go in for of shaving their eyebrows and then pencilling them back in again afterwards. I believe they are trying to give a message - "I'm perfectly cabable of growing a full beard, I choose not to." (This is for the men by the way, not the pencilling women.)

Of course, this message can easily be misinterpreted as "Coo, don't I look daft."

This is the umpteenth anti-beard posting I've seen on H2G2. (I don't know how many exactly, I haven't counted.) Some men grow beards because they think they look better that way. The different styles of beards (you wouldn't believe how many there are) arise because different men think that different shaped beards look better on them. Some men grow beards because they're lazy. In my husband's case, it started because he didn't want to shave during a 2 week holiday, and continued when he found that a beard suited him.

Let's look at it another way. Why shave? What does shaving prove? Mother Nature provided men with beards, for reasons best known to herself. What is the point of wasting God knows how much time shaving the darned things off?

What I can't stand is 'designer stubble'. This just looks scruffy, as if the man got up too late (for whatever) to have time to shave before he went out.

As a dedicated 'shaver' - and bear in mind this is only a personal viewpoint - I find having any sort of beard to be irritable. In addition, for some reason, it is harder to keep the complexion clear. Maybe this is just vanity, but then so would 'styling' a beard be classed.

I believe that man has the natural trend to grow a beard to insulate the face in colder weather conditions, so someone living in a desert type environment wouldn't really have the need to grow one.

Again, in my experience, women tend to prefer me without a beard as when kissing it can prove irritable to be wearing a beard. I suppose this also reflects most mens preference for the women to have shaved legs.

Not only this, If I didn't shave, I'd miss the daily ritual of standing in front of a mirror, sucking in my beer gut, and pretending to myself that I actually still look quite muscular, 'a fine catch for any young filly!'

It's not meant to be anti-beard, I'm just curious... I can see the point about growing a beard for warmth, or just to avoid shaving, but that doesn't explain why some men choose to shave certain bits of their face and not other bits!

The disease of the 19-20th centuries - Vanity!

…because some bits of some faces turn bright red and start weeping after shaving. If I have a beard over my chin and upper lip I can get away with only doing my neck with a pair of clippers rather than wet-shaving it. To do this with no permanent beard would, as has been said, look crap.

That depends... Is the guy married or single?

Single men sculpt their beards (or faces) in whatever way they think will most likely keep them from being alone that night.

Married men will sculpt theirs in whatever way will keep them -out- of the company of the family pet for the night.

Oi, Squiggle, write something on your home page, then I can contact you there.

Bloody Gravi Waves people

I don't know. At first my girlfriend liked it but now complains that it goes up her nose. I, however, am now used to it and think my face looks squashed without it. The not-having-to-scrape-my-face thing is the biggest advantage.

Removing the discuss button from untouched pages was a mistake I wouldn't have thought TPTWVH would have made.

Personally I like beards and moustaches, and really don't have a favourite shape any more than I know -why- I like them. Perhaps because it's natural?

(I do tend to (generally) like that which is real over that which is manicured to a human's (or 'society's) taste, which drove my city-bred neighbours crazy. )

I do strange beard things for variety. I got tired of looking at the same face for about twenty years, so I grew a moustache. After a few years of that, I let it become a van-dyke. I have a thick jaw, so if I were to go full-bearded, my head would look like an enormous pear.

I may do something different with my facial hair in a few years; maybe shave off the moustache and just wear a goatee. Dunno yet. Whatever strikes my fancy.

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Having the sort of face that starts around my hairline and tehn continues down past my chin and into the soulder region with no discernable neck (yes, i'm a fat git) I find that my beard at least gives me a 'border' and frames the face part, making it identifiably different from the neck part.

That and the endless fun trimming it into different styles and kidding myself on that it has suddenly made me look stunningly attractive.....

Seriously though, didn't you know that a beard, like glasses, suddenly endows the weared with a 10%+ boost to their IQ? If it's a full blown Karl Marx you can boost that to an extra 50% or more!

I wonder what would happen if women started shaving designs into the hair on their legs rather than waxing?

Well...my esteemed father grew a beard after a traffic accident that left him with a most painful gash down one side of his face (though he did shave it off as soon as he was able). Also, he wore a moustache in his younger days which made him look rather dashing, in contrast to the aging family-man look he now sports.

Heh.. By contrast, my father could never make it through the ticklish, itchy stage of beard-growing. Then, when he was around 40ish, one of the dispatchers at work, in conjunction with the terminal manager (he was a trucker at the time, in case you couldn't guess by the terminology ) started riding him about getting his hair cut (completely illogical -- he wore his hair all of about a half-inch long for pete's sake!) My rebel-at-heart Dad (who had up to that point prided himself on controlling those natural instincts) decided to let his hair grow. We have pictures of a more-salt-than-pepper man with a moustache. (He tried the beard, but still couldn't get past the itch. )

Oh, and with 'long' hair... My gawd it touched his collar in places!

I thought he looked quite dashing, myself!

Personally, I shave to avoid looking like a right tit. Being hormonally challenged (or something) it would take me somewhere around an Eon to grow a sensible looking beard (which I probably could do, if my father is any guide). X number of months of looking like a fourteen year old, trying to look sixteen, would drive me nuts. Also, some of it grows in blonde, while some grows in black, it don't half look weird.

My ex-brother-in-law has dark brown hair and a blond moustache, which looks a bit odd. Apparently, when he grows a beard (which is seldom) the beard is reddish, which looks really weird.