h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I just finished reading Dante's Inferno, and I've been struggling to figure out just which circle I would be in...
I guess, technically, most people would fall under usary, but I think it's a little outdated. So H2G2...help me out a bit. Where would you be? maybe it'll give me an idea on where to place myself...

--Apollo

Well it is quite clear to me that Terminal 3 at Heathrow is the 4th pit of hell.

Advise us Apollo - which circle ís which?

agcB

Alrighty then...here we go:

Outside the gates of Hell are the opportunists, loyal only to themselves.
Circle 1 contains the virtuos pagans; good, but born before the coming of Christ.
Circle 2 is home to the Carnal, those that gave in to their passions
Circle 3 contains the gluttons.
Circle 4 is where the Hoarders and the Wasters are kept.
Circle 5 contains the wrathful and the sullen.
Circle 6 is reserved for Heretics.
Circle 7 Round 1--the violent against their neighbors Round 2--the violent against themselves (suicides) Round 3--the violent against God, Nature, and Art (Blasphemers, Sodomites, and Usurers)
Circle 8--
Round 1--Panderers (pimps) and seducers
Round 2--Flatterers
Round 3--Simoniacs (made a mockery of church office)
Round 4--Fortune tellers and Diviners
Round 5--Grafters
Round 6--Hypocrites
Round 7--Thieves
Round 8--Evil Counselors
Round 9--Sowers of Discord
Round 10-Falsifiers (Impersonators, counterfeitors, and false witnesses)
Circle 9 Round 1--Treacherous to Kin Round 2--Treacherous to Country Round 3--Treacherous to hosts and guests Round 4--Treacherous to their masters.

I think that covers it.
--Apollo

Ok

Circle 2 - Carnal Passions - just rediscovering them after a few years spent splitting up from the former Mr Ben

Circle 8 Round 5 - Grafters - I certainly work for my living.

Now... let me look again and see who I would like to keep company with...

a sinner called Ben

And for company:

Circle 7 Round 3--the violent against God, Nature, and Art (Blasphemers, Sodomites, and Usurers)
and
Round 4--Fortune tellers and Diviners

but they are all a pretty sorry lot, really aren't they?

agcB

Here we go:

I reckon I'd feel at right at home in Circles 2, 3, 4 and 6, as well as Circle 7 Round 3. I'm not sure about Ususry, though - isn't that about charging excessive interest? I've not read Dante, though, maybe there's another archaic meaning. I'm not above showing an unhealthy interest, but that would come under Circle 2.

BTW, Ben - I don't see why you should go to Hell for working. I thought it meant graft in the sense of corruption. Mind you, some of the places I've worked I feel like I've already been to Hell!

CK

Of course when I said 'Ususry' I meant Usury. Ususry is much worse and you'd deserve to go to Hell for that!

Well, if having the guided tour first is out of the question I suppose I should be in Circle 6 as an atheist. But Circle 2 also sounds like fun. Maybe also the Church mockering would be the place to put me.

When I die, I want to be buried in an asbesto suit and with a big box of marshmallows.

Psst... Hey, if God comes by here, would you tell him from us, we appreciate the offer and everything, but we've decided we really don't want to inherit the earth.
Thanks.
The Meek.

I'll let him know, jwf. I believe he's coming for dinner this Sunday. Probably bringing his dirty laundry too, if I know my boy.

I guess I'm pretty thoroughly entrenched in circle 1, with occasional delightful jaunts into circle 2. It's gooooooood to be me

When I die, bury me deep,
Bury my History books at my feet.
Tell the teacher I've gone to rest,
And I won't be back for the History test.

38-J

JOTD: OPERATOR! Trace this call and tell me where I am.

Hi folks - I'm on a mischievous "dig-up-old-threads" spree here.

See you all in Circle 2.

I'll go on an extra long vacation to Circle 7 round 2 and to Circle 6!

Thanks TC. Amazingly, one can still be learning stuff even at my age. Yes, it's true.

Since this thread came round first time I have discovered that Dante was much influenced by Sufi mysticism and his ten circle dealio is a direct steal (and a blasphemously defiant inversion) of their idea of the ten circles of 'god' (which is itself a variant of Aristotle's hierarchical description of the cosmos but fundamentalised to the Babylonian origins of the multiple godhead ).

That said, I guess you would find me spinning round on all the outer six levels from 1 thru 6. I'm only human.

But I have to say anyone going in any deeper than No.#6 risks losing my sympathy because up to that point the sins are only against 'self', 'god' and 'religion'. They are all 'forgivable'.

Seven thru 10 (thievery, falsehoods, violence, pimping, etc) are all violations against our fellow human beings and as such they are 'unforgivable', totally repugnant to me, beyond my ken and well beyond my can. I mean I just 'couldn't' and have never understood how anyone else can.

For those who don't know, Dante was a very bitter man at the time he wrote this stuff. Bitter, very, very bitter. He had been exiled from his home town (in absentia) by a conspiracy of his 'friends' and 'family'. He describes them all there in the infernos he imagined for them. Yes, a very bitter man.

peace
jwf

I'd say I spent my first decade in # 1
second decade in # 2
Travelled thru 3-6 and started it all over again, always trying and needing work on #3-#6!

If you need help in picking your circle...

A792326

A modern day version.

Sprout

~Bistro

That changes things
I like the modern version, more clarity

Is that true jwf? I have no idea about Dante really, so I will now find out something on the basis of what you said. We are members of the "Dante Alighieri Society", as my husband has a lot to do with Italy (teaches Italian, spends a lot of time there with school classes) He probably has an edition of the Inferno. And if he doesn't have a biography of Mr D, then I can get him one for Christmas.

Perhaps I shouldn't be in that Society - heaven knows what it's really about! On the face of it it is like the British Institute - just promoting Italian culture. The wine and pasta bit I can cope with, and I'm getting into the Roman ruins, have spent nearly 30 years living with one ... but depressed authors and embittered philosophies does rather make you choke on your spaghetti.




PS correction: my husband is not a Roman ruin - he just keeps dragging me to them.

Sorry about the digression - do carry on choosing your circles, folks.