h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*A typical military mess hall with the kitchen separated by a partition. There is a separate mess for officers and enlisted men.*

*Scandrea walks in, leading Captain HPB, and makes herself a plate.*

*splats food onto plate and grimaces*

Everywhere seems empty despite the.. cosyness.

Eh, you get used to it. I'm a field geologist by training, so I'm eager to get out and do some actual work for a change.

And it's only empty because it's late at night. I'm surprised you stayed this late, Captain. You seem like you would have a family to get back to.

Never had the time.

*sits and pokes food with fork*

I'm planning on asking the Colonel for an apartment offsite. Barracks aren't my style.

Please, 'HPB'. But of course that's your choice, Ma'am.

All right, Haytch! You may call me Scandrea, but that is also your choice.

That nickname's been following me for years!

*Removes a jar of various spices, and adds them to her food. She passes the jar off to HPB*

It makes it much more palatable- clockwise starting from the bright red is chili, oregano, garlic powder, and cinnamon.

*pushes the cinnamon back*

What about you?

*eats a small mouthful*

Family? How long you been here?

I don't have a family of my own yet. My parents are back in Ohio, and my dad's still not thrilled that I joined the services. He threatened to break my legs when I got recruited! My brother is still in college, should be a good journalist someday.

I actually do have an apartment offsite, but it's so late that I think I'm just going to crash out in the barracks. That's one thing- you don't have to drive.

*Eats a few bites.* So tell me about these naquadah ideas you had!

Well if naquadah can be used for healing devices and hand devices, could we not use it with our own.?

The research says it's part of the Goa'uld's genetic make-up thus allowing them to use their weapons.

Can we not do that for SG-1, 4 and 6? Adapt the human genetic make-up respond to naquadah, or preprecisely isolate the Goa'uld gene and apply it to us rather like recent experiments where goats are bred to produce web fluid with spider genes because spiders are too aggressive to be kept together and thus not enough.

You've had some biology training, haven't you?

I think you might want to bring that up to the medical staff. There might have already been some research into that sort of thing that isn't in the physics archives. And you'll have to be careful about ethics. The /last/ thing this place needs is some religious fundamentalist politician accusing us of playing God!

What you might want to look into though, is why naquadah responds to Go'aould genes, and if there's any way to manipulate the crystal structure so it would respond to human ones.

I'm not saying breed people for specific tasks! *laughs*

Apply it like a vaccine possibly.

The last thing I need is to be working hours on nuking the stuff !

*Laughs, and stirs some more chili powder into her taco salad.*

A vaccine we could sell to even the worst politician. Good thinking, but I'd explore the crystal structure angle first. We already know about variants out there, and if we could artificially make one that responds to humans, it would make life a lot easier, no bioengineering involved.

At least look through the biologists archives!

*nods* Similar to the symbiotes.

You might want to put this forth to the Colonel on your own. You know more about it than I do.

I don't advocate going at this problem like you want to, but I respect the fact that I might be wrong about it.

*Major Scandrea stands.*

I'm going to retire to the barracks tonight. Enjoy the rest of the evening, Hayche!

*Cleans up her things and leaves for the barracks.*

*nods*

*finishes food then heads to see Colonel.*

*walks in and considering the options of "vegitable mush" or "unnamed meat mush" opts for the vegitarian option, and is given some sort of pasta coverd in vegitable mush*

*sits down and contemplaits the chances of the meal changing biochemical waste*

< Oops, >

*finishes eating the pasta and mush*

*leaves*

*enters*
You know what I love about Services food? They have...
90p for breakfast
£1.20 for lunch
£1.40 for dinner

per person per day...and they still serve pretty good food...and the very best thing is...on weekends there's all-day breakfast!

*grabs a tray and loads plate with 3 sausages, 4 rashers of bacon, 2 fried eggs, 3 hash browns, 2 grilled tomatoes, a dob of scrambled egg, and a piece of french toast*

Well it did take me 14 hours to get here! I only flew in this morning.

*wanders to leave tray at a table, gets ketchup, cutlery and three cups of squash*