h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

'Dogs have owners; cats have staff'

Anon.

Hit Man (Bruce Willis):
"It does not matter how meny people I have killed,
what matters is how I get along with those who are still alive"


Dancer

"Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee
on
your computer."
--Bruce Graham

"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast."
--Unknown

"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never
forgotten this."
--Anonymous

"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled
through
snow."
--Jeff Valdez

"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats."
--English proverb

"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."
--Ellen Perry Berkeley

"One cat just leads to another."
--Ernest Hemingway

"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you
later."
--Mary Bly

"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many
ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia."
--Joseph Wood Krutch

"People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life."
--Faith Resnick

"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned
by
cats."
--Anonymous

"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is
infinitely superior."
--Hippolyte Taine

"No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome
me."
--Unknown

"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and
cats."
--Albert Schweitzer

"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart."
--Ernest Menaul

"Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God."
--Colette

"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they
have
many other fine qualities as well."
"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange
cats."
--Colonial American proverb

"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for
what you want."
-Joseph Wood Krutch

"I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic." "My husband said it was
him or the cat ...
I miss him sometimes."

"Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit."

I dont like cats...

I do.

Obviously

Here's a classic from Nietzsche (no, that's not the sound of me sneezing):

"He who fights with monsters should be careful lest he thereby become a monster. And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee."

There are so many qotes to choose from its inpossible to say which is my favorite. But Brd Pitt's "And if you screw this up I'll shave, sterilize and destroy you." Is pretty funny.


heart of Darkness

Now what is a favorite quote? Or better phrased how does one establish a favorite quote? What are the guidelines? Does one choose wit, sarcasim, funny, serious, or deep. Or should a person try to find a quote that has a mix of the trates listed above. Or can someone simpy say "Its my favorite I can choose what I want it to be." I find multipul quotes to be good, or interesting, or fuuny, or insightful. But I can't say which one is the best. "Best" can that also be a term to measure quotes. But I find trying to measure quotes goes in dizzying loop. I mean ok, I think quote A is the best. because it is funny, and witty. But didn't we already say the qualities of being funny and witty where already reasons to make favorite quote. See my logic has looped and I'm back where I started. Therefore the easiest way to go is to say its my favorite quote, beause I like it.

heart of Darkness

Just put them all in. I've posted about 50 so far. An entertaining or insightful quote is a joy to behold, so someone had the excellent idea of compiling them all here. Perhaps it really ought to be called 'Every Half-decent Quote You've Ever Heard?' In fact...

"This thing will pass away".

Count in on the fingers of one hand when you're having the worst day EVER. It stops me from punching, crying or messing myself!

I think it goes more like "This too shall pass" - it's a chineese proverb that was featured on this thread twice already.

Actually I just wanted to bookmark, so I had to say something

,

Dancer

Yeah 'this toooooo will pass away', i've been using the quote since I was a teenager and over the years I lost the proper words, thanks for being there for me, to put me back on the straight path...

"Do to others, what you hope they would do to you tooo"

Or in the words of JC: "Love your neighbour as thyself." Note, he doesn't say "as you would thyself" he say "as thyself" ie. we are all one so when you love your neighbour you're loving yourself. This is uncharacteristically sentimental of me, but it's something worth saying.

This is actually from the bible


Dancer

'Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, though it may be necessary, from time to time, to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye' Miss Piggy

What a wise female she is

Kermit: How did you learn to drive?
Fozzie: I took a correspondence course.

What a class movie the Muppet Movie really is !!!

"...Movin' right along in search of good times and good news..."

"...With good friends you cant loose..."

"...This could become a habbit..."

We've got it on video at home. It's got kids' jokes, adults' jokes, everything!

*goes to very begining to see who started thread*
*smiles* Oh yes, of course...

"I seem alive
confronting you
I am afraid
and maybe
I seem to be
sane to you
I am, lying
I'm lying"

-by E*SO

peace.