h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Surrounded by electrified barbed wire, with zombies and ghosts patroling the grounds, stands the camp. In the exercise yard a BBQ is is progress, with cooking your favorite meal. Trained attack dogs are sitting at her feet, begging. Occasionally she throws them a (the fence is locked, but a certain set of skeleton keys are floating around...)

Throw a on the Barbie for me will you X-R

(MeeOOOWWW. *sizzle*)
The creepy coupe 3 comes screeching into the compound, with passengers. hops out and tends the BBQ, turning Red's meal and the other, less controversial dishes, as well.
a second vehicle appears. hopes they remember to hit the breaks.

*UH leaps from the car, bundles the comatose Arl into a big bunker and takes up position behind a sandbagged machine gun post*

Del Preston: Now these babies tend to heat up, so we'll be firing them in 3 second bursts

[A column of blue light shoots down from the sky, them morphs into a lump of blue light with red flecks, then morphs into a humanoid-shaped bit of blue, red, and peach-colored light, then transforms into YK in a superhero outfit. This is Last Word man, a.k.a. Snowball. His white helmet then materializes.]

[Snowball] Whazzup??

Saturn Girl slips out of the Creepy Coupe III, and ducks behind an abandoned sand back to check her weapon stock. Deciding that she is definately under prepaired for this situation, she slips off to the store rooms to snag some comfortable, and easily blendable clothing, then hunt down the weapons locker.

She finds a worn in pair of combat boots in the right size, as well as a brand new black tank top, and a pair of cargo pants in a green and brown camofage. She quickly changes into these, and grabs some face paint in browns and greens to match her new pants. She quickly covers her face in the greasy stuff, and digs up a olive green helmet which she drops on her head, sliding her favorite dagger into her left boot before she left the room in hunt of the weapons locker.

*sits next to BB in car, still sulking*

It wouldn't be so bad, but I'm still in this darn suit

*flips burgers.* oh,yeah.* clown suit vanishes, hopefully relieving sarge.*
*stops cooking for a moment, rummages around in pocket, finds camoflage designer sheet. dons, puts greasy stuff where her face would have been. slips on gun belt and 2 bandeleros, crossed over chest. puts pearl-handled colt .45 in gun belt. Goes back to cooking.*
Burgers, anyone? I cut back on the hot sauce, really. Honest.

*Red Dog energises electric fences with his all-purpose standard issue ACF remote control and illuminates BBQ area with PoW Camp searchlights*

OK that should create the right lighting and ambiance for the Cat Hunt. I`m going after Saturn Girl .

*Zips up ink black coverall and dons webbing. Checks his Potato Army spud gun - the double barrelled, semi automatic model with a hopper feed. Sets to rapid chipolata mode*

*Radio`s into ACF fighter command and Slips off into the undergrowth *

I'm very glad I'd got a t shirt and shorts on underneath

Even if they are orange.

*notices orange shape near car*

*cocks spud gun, aims and presses trigger*

POK-POK-POK-POK-POK

*watches from some undisclosed and shadowy spot. Starts to think about her plan of attack.*

[Last Word Man raises his F-Buster and holds the firing spud down.]

[SFX: Ratatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatatat etc.]

[The F-Buster strikes the car and fails to make any indentation on it whatsoever.]

[Snowball] Hey ... I can /aim/ this thing! [aims the F-buster at the orange thing, which blows up] Oh, wait ... that was just a pumpkin. D'OH!

*continues to sit in the car handcuffed to BB*

I wish he'd wake up

*Saturn Girl stops watching the main yard, and finds the weapon's locker. She helps herself to a small hand gun, a few extra rounds, and a semi automatic machine gun with extra amo as well as a holster over her back. Grabbing a dozen or so throwing knives, she hides them in various places on her person, and slips out of the weapon's locker to watch from her undisclosed location again, being careful to make sure Red Mutt was in visable sight still.*

*lays down some covering fire from the bushes*

POK-POK-POK-POK-POK-POK

*runs over and joins Uncle in the sandbag machine gun position*

I`m out of spuds for me gun Uncle.

*Radio`s to over at the BBQ*

Kkkkkksschhh ... Dog over. Requesting 5lb of King Edwards please ..... ssshhhhhskweeeeeeeeel ....... ick as you can.

Blast no idea if she got that Unc.

It's no good sir. She woulndt have got the message. I volunteer to break cover to get the supplies sir.

*Busterbone leaps out of car still handcuffed to the Sarge, falls on ground*

I think you'd better get out of that orange gear Sarge. You make us too much of a target.

Here put these jungle greens on. I'll look...um...somewhere else.. while you're....um you know...changing clothes and stuff.

*looks away. Begins to hum nervously*

*peers through Bino`s*

MY EYES MY EYES !!!!

*hands Bino`s to Unc*

*embarrassedly changes, making sure BB isn't peeking*

*looks herself over*

That's better. Feel almost human now

What are we going to do about these handcuffs?