h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*A few lazer beams strike the Whirling Dervish of Cresh, and it now recognizes interspark's mecha as something that must be dealt with. It stomps in that direction, leans down, and slices at it*

*Inside the opened cement truck, the Krylma Leader is standing waist deep in dried cement, glaring up*

KL-Get someone from the science wing with the tantalus solvent! ...and do I still hear the sounds of combat out there? Good grief, why haven't the competitors run through The Gauntlet yet? Their initiation time has certainly expired by now!

Science wing, tantalus solvent, right. *looks concerned* Have a free hot dog. Do you take mustard?

*Sol has struggled her way through the window and is now standing on the top of the mecha, surveying the devastation of the stadium with a frown, clearly wondering how she will get down.

Luckily, she kicked a lever on her way out. A large flying pestle and mortar appear beside her. She seems somewhat surprised, but climbs in anyway.

Sol seems to be having trouble with her morphic field. It keeps flickering. As the morter takes off towards the stands, she can be heard exclaiming...*

...IRON TEETH?

[Ray manages to get unsteadily to his feet.]

[Ray] [blearily] Gauntlet? Nobody told *me* about any *gauntlet.* Ow.

[He considers this, and then strolls towards the Science Wing, obviously not in any kind of hurry.]

*notices the incoming attack*

RIGHT! we must initiate the defence immediately, downloading turtley defence software.... NOW!

*a loading bar appears on the screen, which begins moving along at a painfully slow rate, the dervish's slash severly dents inter's mecha's hull and sends it sliding backwards, the words "Download Complete" appear on inter's screen*

well there's some irony for ya!

*slowly gets back up and heads for the nearest exit*

Relish? Chopped onion?

*The Krylma Leade rpoints at Lil*

KL-Having considered it, I will accept your hot dog offer! Ketchup, mustard, chopped onion, maybe a pickle...but NO relish, or I'll have your head!

*He stretches up as much as he can and peers out at Ray*

KL-Yes! The Gauntlet! Over there!

*He points across the field to a big tunnel in the center of a bull's eye that descends into darkness*

KL-STUMPED ID cards will be down there for anyone who lasted the three days...if they can make it to the tunnel's end!

[Ray] Hmm ... Okay. I'm-a go to the science wing first, I need a quick break.

[He heads off to the science wing.]

Hold the relish, right you are, your Krylmaness.

*the vendor assembles the order, places it in a paper holder with a napkin and passes it across to the KL's outstretched hand*

I believe that young gentleman has gone off to the science wing to fetch back the tantalus you asked for. May I ask why all these people have been fighting each other? I understand about contests -- stadiums is my livelihood, you might say -- but usually one side or another is declared the winner.

If you don't mind my saying, this seemed more like aimless destruction that ran itself down like a clockwork toy, sort of like.

*The Krylma Leader takes the hotdog*

KL-The point is survival. Those who die or give up may not join the ranks of STUMPED.

A conversation over 6 years long... only on H2G2!

In the mean time, I have entered Law School in the US and have taken the first steps to becoming a true, real life super villain! Bwa hahahahaha!


Redfox, re-reporting for duty, and ceasing any previous activities (for the sake of the backlog), on hand with a briefcase full of law books. I will inundate our opposition with time consuming but not quite frivolous law suits to such a point as that they can no longer function!

OOC
Er, um, the first two sentences in the last post are out of continuity.
/OOC

New H2G2 strips out fake-HTML tags. They're still visible in Classic, though. (This is why I'm sticking with Classic 'til it dies.)


[Ray returns a bit later with a group of nervous-looking techs.]

[Ray] Hmm ... so ...

[He walks to the edge of the arena, peering at the Whirling Dervish of Cresh, trying to psychically detect if there's anything he can break remotely with just telekinesis from here.]

[Ray] Oh, right. Is the Gauntlet something that requires the use of these mechas? Mine, y'know, broke.

I say there, did you bring back the tantalus what his Leaderhood here requires?

[to redfox] Have you got the briefs of Tantalus? *sniggers*

[Tech] [who has a silly voice] Yeah, he did!!!

[The techs approach KL apprehensively.]

*The Krylma Leader grabs the tantalus solvent and begins applying it to the hardened cement, turning it into a more viscuous substance that will flow away from the contact of biological creatures*

KL-No, Ray, your Mech is not required, and it would not fit.

*The Whirling Dervish of Cresh has found the "giant chessboard" section of the arena and is slicing and dicing the checkered squares*

[Ray considers a moment, and nods.] Gotcha! Let's go, then.

[He confidently strides into the Gauntlet.]

[Tech #2] He threatened us because he we weren't going to bring it out at first, since he didn't have a STUMPED ID. Um, just saying that for the record.

Are all the customers going down that tunnel, then? *peers apprehensively into the dimness*

*restive clicking and buzzing comes from within the box* I have to exercise the locusts regularly, especially since they've been busy bringing the swarm back up to strength. Please don't worry, I have them under control.

*the vendor opens the porthole, and out come the locusts. A few hundred descend upon the Krylma leader and consume the remains of the netting in his horns and the paper napkin in his fist then join the rest of the horde, which settles on the stadium lawn to finish off whatever hasn't been blackened by combat*

Horns? The Krylma Leader had horns?


*When Ray enters the tunnel he sees, well, a long tunnel carved out of rock and decorated with pleasant, though simple, tiles on the walls, ceiling and floor. Far at the other end of the tunnel is a larger room with a pedestal, upon which sits his ID card*