h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*pops out through cupboard, multi-post existing once again*


FINALLY!! I'm Free!!!! I've been lost in this $@%#$ cupboard for 6 years!


oh... and thanks for getting rid of those Barney's. That's why I hid in there in the first place

*sits back to watch the proceedings*

*Throws a Barney plush toy at SM, it explodes in the air over her head and raigns all those Barney-ish emotions on her.*

*soaks in emotions*

*has sudden, horrible urges to sing happy songs in a group while marching around with a stupid grin on her face*

*gets over it*



*raises her hand, conjuring up more blue sparkly mist, and sends it in a beam at HDS... giving him legs under his kilt as blue as Apollos are golden*

*bites back urge to make refferences to the song the Scottsman*

Omi-gods!

*Points his palms at his black and white Converse All-Stars and shoots white light at them, they glow and his legs are pale again.*

Fah! Dirty pool!

*raises hands and points them at SM's chest. Shimmering prismatic light plays across SM's body and she is covered in foot long hot pink hair.*

*changes the color of the hot pink hair to a less fashionably offencive color, purple and green pokadots, then continues to watch*

Oi!

*points palms at SM again and, after more shimmering prismatic light, the foot long body hair becomes a blinding bright green with hot pink and bright yellow streaks that makes a pattern that is over all, very bad for the eyes to look at*

*SM desolidifies, then returns to her normal state, with a slightly blue tint on her skin*

You don't think a goddess of a colour can't change her appearance easily?

*blue mist spills from her hands and around HDS, and becomes solid enough to bear his weight. And begins to lift him up into the air*

*HDS glows blue and his siloutte streaks infintely forward and back and he dissappears from the mist block. A simmilar streak happens in reverse and HDS appears slightly behind and to the right of SM. HDS wraps one anr around her neck and tugs her towards his side, with his other hand he gives her a noogie and then lets go of her and leaps away.*

Argh! My hair!

*opens cupboard*

*takes out a mirror and comb*

*rectifies hair while scowling and tapping her foot*

Hmm...lessee

*a tendril of mist snakes up to HDS's kilt, and latches onto the bottom*

*and abruptly yanks*

*before SM can see his genitals, HDS dives at the tendril and yanks his kilt back. He turns so that she can only see his bum and swiftly puts it back on.*

Very dirty almost pornographic pool!

*HDS points his hand at her and her shirt suddenly is yanked up over and around her head, bringing her arms with her so that she can barely move them*

*luckily SM, being a gal, has a bra on*

*shrugs, and pulls her shirt the rest of the way off, straightens it out, and pulls it back on unhurriedly*

Dear dear... you shouldn't let your anger get the better of you...

*another tendril grabs his ankle and pulls forwards, while one solidifies behind his knees, knocking him over*

*she wanders up to him and stares down at him*

...or you might get overcome by it

*Smiles up at SM. Snaps his fingers and her vaunted bra suddenly appears twisted around her ankles, trippng her up and dropping her right next to HDS*

*looks down*

Well that taught me, didn't it?

*for want of better inspiration, flicks him painfully on his ear with her finger*

ow!

*licks his pinky and sticks it in her ear, turns it around a bit and then retracts it, wiping it off on her shirt sleeve as he does*

Eew! EeeeeEEEEW!

How can you *stoop* to suck levels?

*opens cupboard*

*finds a rubber fish*

*starts slapping him with it, a-la Monty P sketch*

Because I'm evil!

*Smacks SM with a real chicken that screems loudly whenever it makes contact*

What an unfortunate spelling mistake

*many small, thin tendrils of mist suddenly converge on HDS, tickling furiously*

*SM uses this diversion to get up and sort herself out*

*drops the chicken and starts ing and crying at once.*

Mwa ha ha

*sorts out her hair while she's waiting*