h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

::Saturn stands in a a part of the universe called dead space looking around, waiting to see if any of the others will come to her favored battle zone and chanllenge her::

*Wanders in and sits down on an astroid to make sure she has a prime seats for when the battle begins. Is nursing her poor kitty which Apollo so rudely burned by tossing it into a pot that was trying to cook red fish*

*Caper Plip appears opposite SaturnsDaughter in a puff of chalk, fresh from her post-battle break. She eyes up her new opponent and grins.*

Okay, I challenge you!

::looks at the new person and calks her head to the side:: Do i know you? ::shrugs:: oh well ok

So it begins... Saturnsdaughter vs. Caper Plip
*sits down next to SaturnGirl..."accidentally" sits on kitty*

*Caper Plip acknowledges the growing crowd and turns back to her opponent.*

I don't know you either, but does your total indifference to the battle mean that you concede already?

*shoves Apollo off her lap, where the kitten is still sitting. After another strong shove to knock him off her astroid, she raises a fuss over the poor little abused kitten.*

::laughter shows in her eyes:: Well, anyway ::looks a little imbarressed:: I'm not quite sure how we fight..... see ::twirls her glaive:: I'm used to sparing fighting, not quite sure what i should do here, oh and if that was suppose to be some sort of insult it didn't come across as one :: with out warning her eyes turn a harsh purple, and she sighs shakes her head:: those with simple minds. ::flicks some black fire at paper clip:: ever been to Hades?

Here's a link to it http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/F72943?thread=129876

Hades is quite nice this time of year... My mother has a place all reserved for her, since she works in a car dealership... I may just have to drop in and visit her from time to time when she finally gets down there to move in.

Been to Hades, had ice cream in Hades (courtesy of MoG), played tennis in Hades... according to that thread I came to Hades on the first page and I haven't left yet

*Caper Plip laughs at her inexperienced opponent, knowing that her opponent should think before she acts. Caper Plip easily catches the fleck of black fire between her forefinger and thumb, and extinguishes the fire like an oxymoron of the old British Gas adverts.*

*She grabs a nearby asteroid and holds it up. Her arm draws back and she bowls the asteroid at SaturnsDaughter with divine force.*

*The bowling asteroid strikes SaturnsDaughter full and slams her to the ground violently. She is now sporting an unsightly rip on her purple dress and also two black eyes, which replace the previously purple glowing ones. Due to his large mass, the asteroid catches on to the strong gravitational field of the Sun God and begins to orbit him, with no chance of being moved away.*

Woohoo! Strike!

::stands laughter in her eyes, she heals:: oh my dear did I forget to mention something, rebirth, it's a niffty little gift I have, ::with out thinking twice she twirls her glaive and slams it right into paper clip's chest:: oh and by the way u moded back there you must wait for your apponents move, before you can claim anything ::she flips away:: oh and I may be new to this god fighting, but I'm in no way new to rp fighting ,

(Okay may i suggest we clear the rules here, the way u spar and the way i spar are completely different, need to know the rules before i start fighting, have to make sure I'm not braking any.)

The basic rules can be found on the main page of the Battle of the Gods... as far as continuity, try to generally stick to it. It can be flexible, i.e. saying that one of your moves had a certain effect on your opponent. But you cannot assume that your opponent will react a certain way. (Saying Caper Plip was thrown across the Galaxy and smashed into a black hole is alright, but then saying that she tried to fly out and was hit by an asteroid is pushing it). However, the BoG is very flexible.. so you two can decide most of the rules for yourselves

Excuse me CP.... I'm being ORBITED?!?!

The Battle of the Gods rules are here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A598638

Regards to moding - I'm following how others have battled in threads previous to this one... and it appears to be totally within the rules.

Hmmmmm, why don't you laugh out loud? I mean, it's great to see your eyes laughing but it clashes terribly with your dreary mouth expression. Healing? Rebirth? Really, that's old stuff now! I mean, they went out with pleated skirts!

*Caper Plip sees the glaive hit her chest. She snatches the weapon out of SaturnsDaughter's hand and snaps it in two with a quick movement of her fingers. Grabbing a portable crusher, Caper Plip places the two halves under it and amuses herself by watching the glaive crunch and crumble under the intense pressure, leaving nothing but microscopic pieces. This she sends off to the local astronomy unit for routine analysis and then eventually to be displayed in a respectable planetarium as fragments from another world...*

*Seeing that SaturnsDaughter's dress still has that large rip in it, Caper Plip takes the initiative to purposely stand on the hem of that dress. She draws her foot back, and the entire back of the dress tears off with the force.*

*SaturnsDaughter's bare shoulders and the rest of the back of her body are now overtly visible to all.*

Ah, Apollo, blame physics for that asteroid orbiting you. It's not my fault if you happen to have a large mass.

[In response to the "large mass" comment, Apollo has moderated himself before the official moderators could get to him. There may be children reading this!]

*shakes head*

It's not that big! Your loin cloth doesn't hide much... and it certainly wouldn't hide it if it was that big!

Maybe when you are around...
CP seems to have a different opinion

::she laughs:: Interesting the way you fight Paper clip ::twirls and she is in battle attire:: ahhh much better ::she now stands there in a purple tanktop and black cargo's with steel toed boots an evil girn shows on her face, she snaps her fingers and a new glaive appears in her hand:: hmm... ::her eyes shut and she mutters a few things without much notice paper clip starts rising she gets twisted into all manner of things, from ballon animals to a pretzel:: Oh this is fun ::she finally stops and sets fire to paper clip along with shaving her head bald:: oh that is so you dear

Paper Clip? Who's Paper Clip? Anyone see a Paper Clip?

*A small and incredibly little paper clip is seen in SaturnsDaughter's hands, ablaze and being shaved bald and twisted into various shapes.*

Paper Clip?

*Caper Plip pulls out her magic tennis racquet and creates a temporal space-time warp. This she disappears through, and she does not return.*

*The temporal space-time warp re-opens, and a figure leaps out, wearing a black hat, black scarf, black cloak... well, wearing black. This figure doesn't appear to be Caper Plip...*

*In both hands, the figure clutches a cream custard flan. Suddenly, someone shouts:*

Gods and goddesses, it's the Phantom Flan Flinger!

*The Phantom Flan Flinger runs up to SaturnsDaughter and throws both cream custard flans at her. One hits her plumb in her face, the other over the top of the head. The cream and custard drips over her neck and her hair is drenched with the stuff. SaturnsDaughter looks a total mess, with purple tanktop soaked in cream. A stench of sour milk now wafts from the direction of SaturnsDaughter.*

*The Phantom Flan Flinger then leaps back into the temporal space-time warp, and doesn't come back. Instead, Caper Plip comes out. She closes the temporal space-time warp behind her, and replaces her magic tennis racquet. She is not wearing her normal white Wimbledon tennis kit, but is now dressed in a black kit, with a black shirt and shorts, and on her head is perched a backwards-facing baseball cap - similarly black and not the usual white one.*

Yeah Apollo, you great beer-bellied, fat-arsed, looks-like-a-great-big-pile-of... -whale-blubber tub of lard!

You should be honoured... not very many people get space debris orbiting them!

*giggles to herself* And those of us who do have space trash in orbit around us usually do it with some class... My rings are coming back nicely after MoG took them to make a new tiara after declairing the battle between Raven and I moot. Obitting space debris does not suit you... And as I said, you most certainly are not that large down there... and Caper Plip doesn't think so either... you might wanna try to work out a little more. She seems to think you're fat. It's hard to get girlfriends to keep up the supply of exes if you're fat