h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

::looks up and sighs:: such silly stunts ::spins and is clean and smells Lemony fresh:: well aren't you the clever one, ::her eyes laugh:: you're just full of intresting suprises aren't you..... tell me what are wearing? Is that suppose to do something? ::shrugs:: tell me Apollo, who is this person anyway..... ::as she is saying this she flicks her hand and the girl who is wearing the black outfit switches places with Apollo letting him come back:: hmmm.... ::sighs, flicks her wirst again and the girl in black comes back:: you're very amusing.... tell me to do you sit there all day thinking this stuff? ::with out thinking much she snaps and five cream pies come flying out of no where and hit the girl in black, shrugs bored::

I'm not real sure what just happened to me, but I don't think I like it

to all of you!

women...

Even your loin cloth won't save you now

No, actually, it's something called spontaneity, and it's related to something else called wit. You may have heard of it... or not.

*Caper Plip pulls out her towel from Wimbledon and cleans herself up super-quick. She pulls out a gigantic magnet and aims it at SaturnsDaughter. Her steel-capped boots are immediately attracted to it, and she is rammed feet-first against the magnet.*

*Caper Plip then hangs the magnet high up from a circling comet (this also happens to be caught in Apollo's gravitational field) and throws various iron pointy objects at her which hit her on various parts of her body, and stay wedged there. Caper Plip disappears in a puff of chalk then returns dressed as a doctor. She analyses SaturnsDaughter's injuries and records on a clipboard a shattered pelvis and collar bone/clavicle, crushed fib, tib and femur, fractured humerus, radius and ulna, twelve broken ribs, internal haemorraging, an unsightly dent on the forehead where an iron is imbedded and a broken fingernail.*

The consultant thinks that you shouldn't play such violent sports. My suggestion is rest, if only for the fingernail. Maybe if you tone down your sport to something like bowls, or even better: taking permanent leave from the sport altogether. I mean, you body just isn't made for that purpose. I've seen many deities come and go here, but none of their injuries were as terrible as yours. For a start, their fingernails were strong and didn't even get scratched!

*Caper Plip disappears in a puff of chalk and reappears in her black tennis kit, carrying a bunch of seedless white grapes from the mortal world for the hospitalised SaturnsDaughter, who is now orbiting the Sun God.*

At least I'm pulling goddesses into my "gravitational field"...
I've been accused of that before

*Awaiting SaturnDaughter's post... CP might be the first to challenge agcB!!

Well, in accordance with the BoG rules, as it has been five days since my last post and SaturnsDaughter has not posted within that time, I have now officially won this battle.

So it would seem

I hate wins by technicalities, but rules are rules... Caper Plip is now the first to win 3 battles!!!!


Allow me some time to set up the arena.... and if you wish, you can challenge the Champion!

*Appears silently, chuckles a bit, and sits on an asteroid to think for a while.*

And to think they consider themselves powerful.

*accidently bumps asteroid, not noticing the little mortal, send Art floating off through space*

Arten, at this time, if you please. Arty is not present

*contents himself with drifting for a while, and begins deep meditation. Arten then, using the deepest form of the Ari, alters reality so as to drift directly back toward reality, applying no force to anything, nor altering space-time.*

If I were mortal I'd be dead. You being a godess, you don't notice the absence of air here. I'm forced to notice these things and correct for them, being a lowly Gadian.

I'm drifting back towards the asteroid, not reality. See? everybody makes mistakes, omnipotence or no

You didn't say that you didn't have a space suit on.... so I assumed you did

ah. dratted logic

heh, logic always seems to come up when least expected, huh? 'Tis annoying stuff unless it's in your favor, huh?

Well, it wasn't quite not in my favor. rather, it was to my advantage for you misconcieved me as mortal. When I'm seen as a mortal, my power is easier to use because I don't need to slow time. That's why I usually leave the doing of things up to Arty. He's so clumsy and, frankly, stupid that no one would suspect anything of him. Indeed, I probably would never have spoken, had I not been tempted to come deflate the oversized egos of greek gods. you have no idea how minimal your power is. Even a novice Gadian can take gods. I'm sorry, I must vanish.

*Arten disappears, leaving etched into the minds of those present that he most certainly is not absent, just unable to speak for a few millenia- or moments. whichever decides to come up*

::sighs:: I'm sorry i haven't been on in like 2 weeks and I know that means I forfited to paper clip oh well.....

What happened? It sucks that you had to forfit...

(Lots and lots of homework....... ewwww..... stupid stuff can reck anybodies day even a goddess's)
::sighs:: so how did she take it....... no doubt very proud of herself.... but it was no true win and if I'm not mistaken you Bombshell goddess are the champ.... so if you don't mind give her a few for me...... I hope you win...... oh and if you want you can do battle here in my dead space..... nice and quite not to many here to bother you or anything.....

Actually, a Goddess called Ben is the champ... the major match has been post poned due to her need to be out of access of a computer for a little while... Caper Plip of course was proud of herself *shrugs* Apollo wasn't all that happy, but a win is a win, technicallity or not....

I'd give her a few for ya, but I will avoid battling her if I can. She doesn't quite play by what I call the rules... even though she technically follows the battle of the gods offical rules. *shrugs* I donno... I'm mostly around to pick on Apollo, and watch everyone else make fools of themself... I wouldn't battle agcB (who I'm sure will kick Caper Plip's goddess butt ) so I wouldn't want the three wins making it so we'd have to battle.

You should drop by the mud pits... lots of crazy stuff happening there.... I don't know if it offically can be called a real battle anymore.. but it's fun none the less.... wrestling in the mud with everyone's favorite golden thighed egotistical sun god 'tis always fun