h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Tavaron chuckles quietly and turns to Jamie*

He said that on Caph v there are sugar bears which mess with your mind. We were there there for my birthday, you know? Ever heard of sugar bears? I haven't.

*Malaba is surprised at herself for daring to do this, and now glances timidly at Ilya*

You're sure you don't mind?

*Jamie thinks*

I've heard Liam talk about them. I think they are found on several planets that grow sugar cane. They must spread in the cane shipments.

Very dangerous animals, I believe.

*Ilya grins at Malaba, and represses the desire to hug her - which he's afraid she wouldn't like*

Mind? After being driven out of my mind by boredom and Lt von Koestler all day? Smeg, no. Let's go, gorgeous.

*He leads the way into the wendy house, which, of course, opens for both of them*

Last one in is a whatchamacallit.

*He kicks off his shoes, strips out of his jeans and black t-shirt in record time, and dives into the pool without a splash*

*Tavaron is still not sure wether they are making fun of her*

Interesting. Well, we fortunately didn't see any there. Well, and as there don't seem to be people on CaphV there are also no cane shipments, maybe the bears didn't get there yet.

*Malaba was certain she was a watchamacallit before she even had a chance to start taking off her boots*

*She efficiently strips off her jumpsuit, under which she's wearing the plain, blue bathing suit, then walks over to the edge of the water, keeping a careful eye out for bees*

*Watching Ilya's easy grace with some envy, she lowers herself into the pool and tries to remember how to swim properly*

*Jamie looks puzzled*

No people? Where did they all go, then? I remember reading a book about the people there, on a mountain...

It was called 'Grimus', by Salman Rushdie. Of course, there weren't many of them.

*Morgan chuckles softly*

Maybe they moved. Or maybe there are two planets called by that name.

*Jamie nods*

Could be. After all, there are lots of planets, and only so many names...maybe there are duplicates.

*Ilya finishes a round of the pool with a flip, and swims over to Malaba*

What do you like to do? Breaststroke, backstroke? Or just float, like Jamie?

*He grins happily*

*Tavaron looks puzzled, too*

Well, I never saw anyone there. It's all just tropical islands and sea. I don't think that anyone lives there... but I can be wrong of course.

*Malaba splashes farther away from the edge*

I like to not sink. I've not gotten further than that.

*She wears an expression of intense concentration as she works on this*

*Jamie shrugs*

Oh, well. I wouldn't know - I haven't been that many places, yet.

*Rory sticks his head out the kitchen door*

Oh, hi, Tavaron. Where's Ilya, people? Supper's ready.

*Morgan looks around*

He and Malaba are swimming. We'll have to take theirs over.

*Rory rolls his eyes*

Always something. Well, come and eat, people, before it gets cold. You staying, Tavaron? I won't even have to set another place.

*Ilya laughs*

Well, not sinking is easier if you don't work so hard at it.

Tell you what, hold onto that rock at the side of the pool. Then let yourself float back, like this.

*He demonstrates*

Now, kick your legs gently, and just practice. It's relaxing. And don't try so hard.

*He kicks his legs out in a leisurely way while holding onto a small rock ledge at the edge of the pool*

*Tavaron smiles*

Hello, Rory. Oh yes, please, I'd like to stay, if you don't mind.

*she stands up and walks to the kitchen with the others*

So, anything new here?

*Malaba looks slightly doubtful, but then does as Ilya says*

Like so? But it doesn't really count as swimming, now does it?

*Rory rolls his eyes again, and starts packing up supper in a warming box for Ilya and Malaba*

*Donald goes to fetch the others, and soon everybody - minus Ilya and Malaba - is sitting down to cevapcici, saffron rice, tzatziki, and corn on the cob*

*A meal a Romanian would love, probably*

*Jamie shrugs*

Not much. We got the heatwave business fixed. Oh, and we arranged for Daniel Hagman and Malaba to be able to visit the wendy house.

*Jamie looks across the table at Morgan, who suppresses a laugh*

*Liam puts in*

Of course, Rory and I have solved the problem of the coefficient of the axial variables in hyperdrive acceleration, but I don't suppose that counts as news.

*Donald almost chokes on his supper*

Aweel, 'tis nae body that minds what the childer get up tae, is there?

*Ilya laughs as he kicks*

Humans. What's *real*? What *counts*? Look, all I want to do in the water is have *fun*. And you can do that better if you ain't fussed about one, whether you can stay up, and two, whether you're doing it the right way. Who cares?

*He stops kicking, lets go of the side, and treads water*

Can you tread water? If you can, then you know you can never, ever, sink. And if you can float, you can't sink. The water will hold you up.

After that, you just decide what fool thing you want to do, and do it.

*He grins*

*Tavaron smiles*

Ah, good. I hope they'll like it.

*she blinks and looks at Liam*

Sorry, you did what?

*Malaba laughs, too*

*She lets go of the side, sinks, kicks her way back up, spits out a stream of water and laughs again*

Ok. I'll remember that method.

*She grins*

So show me some stuff you could do.

*Liam laughs*

Oh, never mind. It's just work-talk.

*Jamie laughs, too*

No more shop-talk. Just eat.

*And they do, complimenting the chef - Rory - on his excellent meal*

*Tavaron chuckles and also turns her full attention to the food. She also tells Rory that it is indeed very delicious*