h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

* knocks and enters with a plate of 's and 's and a pot of *

* finding the place quiet, leaves them on the desk, hoping that 001 and James will return from saving the world in time to enjoy them and that Penny is feeling better today *

*sound of the apples falling on the floor is heard as Hatifnat passes by*

*Roused by the sound of falling apples, 001 pokes his head up from inside a . He looks around for a bit, shakes out his fur, and then spots something in the corner of the cabin. It turns out to be a dimpled cushion, of just the right size and comfort for a guinea pig of his stature*
Squeak!! 8)
*He bounces up and down on the cushion for a while, before dashing out of the cabin to find Caerwynn.*

*Penny Moneypenny returns, dressed like Gina Lolabrigida and feeling somewhat dizzy. She spies the and food and smiles happily. Then she sits in her favourite chair and slumps over he typewriter*

*Pod-JamesPod lands just outside. He unstraps his jet pack, opens the door, and is about to chuck his hat on the hatstand when he notices Moneypenny is asleep, so he doesn't bother. Instead, he kicks off his shoes and flicks on CNN*

*strolls by*

A cushioned guinea pig sty? This is indeed a luxury cruise, isn't it?

ah moneypenny
*sees hard working woman slaving away at her type writer*
i bought these bottles of for james from France, would you mind giving them to him for me?
*thinks moneypenny looks a little depressed and hands her a bottle too*
well if you cant go to the lighthouse the lighthouse will come to you...
oh and please tell james that st. tropez was just unbearable without him...

DM

*moneypenny wakes up suddenly*
Whuuu..
Hooooo...
Haaaa..

*Thinking she's beginning to sound a bit like Al Pachino, she bangs her head off the typewriter*

Oh! My, that nice DM has left me a bottle of wine! How lovely!

*Moneypenny picks up the bottle, bites off the cork, spits it out of the porthole, downs the wine in one go, goes..

Yeeeeebbilsleislllaaaaaiihsss aa a a aaaa Heyyyy!

.. and immediately slumps back asleep over typewriter*

* knocks and enters *

* sees Moneypenny asleep and no sign of the boys *

* puts a large pot of and a plate of 's by Miss Moneypenny *

* picks up the empty bottle and leaves *

Pod?
James Pod?
damn. he's out again.
*leaves note with moneypenny*
James- cabin #84 - minuit - dont bring a friend (unless its the captain)

DM

* knocks and enters *

Hello Penny, how are you?

* with a smile to cover her concern *

Penny, how has James been recently?

*typitty type type*
Oh, Hello Lighthousegirl!
I am fine thank you, how are you?
James has been, well, quite wonderful recently. All he does is come home and fall asleep. Thats just what I like in a man, you know!
He says that London are keeping him too busy right now.
He says he has to try and be sensible or he will never get any work done at all..
Which suits me fine!

Has he ever been like this before? Sensible I mean?

Well, he did try to be a bit sensible in 1987. I remember it well. He suddenly stood up and announced that he was going to mow the lawn, and then try a bit of dusting. I was very surprised, as you can imagine, but I thought well, the lawn does need a bit of a mow, and if James wants to to it, why stop him? Anyway, he forgot that the lawnmower doubled up as a life raft and a flame thrower. He ended up by immolating half the garden and then decided to paddle down to the local for a drink or sixteen.
Have I told you how much I enjoyed your party?

I am glad you had fun! Have you totally recovered now?

If that is what happened last time he tried to be sensible do you think we should be worried?

Is he trying to be sensible again?
Dear oh dear .. foolish man.
Yes thank you, I am back to the typing now.
Is your bar insured?

* looks very concerned *

Penny, what can we do to snap him out of it? He mentioned something about needing a more complicated mission, but you said he was really busy...

He is, it is true. But I think a good mission would help take his mind off things

* thinks out loud *

I wonder where we can get one of those from?

Maybe I should go and talk to the Captain ...

hi moneypenny!
i dont know about you light but i think we need a decent brand of tea on this here ship! all i could find was the herbal stuff that hippies drink i suppose james could be sent on a pg tips expedition?