h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*brings some PGGBs poolside*

Hello girls. Thirsty?

:: lazes in the midday sun by the poolside, quietly humming sunny afternoon to himself ::

wha'? how did i end up here last thing i remember is green smoke

oh, well

i say, mr. christopher, can you spare a PGGB?

*Is floating in a haze of green... *

Lavish!

*Runs up and down the corridors knocking on doors as she passes them and giggling... When someone sticks their head out she shoots them in the foot! She runs around the pool area a couple times, and ends up on the Bridge. She spies what looks to her like a throttle and pushes it forward. The ship begins to pick up speed...*

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

*Hears a strange noise, and looks over the side of the ship. Observes Thog hanging on grimly with one hand while trying to rivet a thruster in place with the other hand.*

Isn't the ship going a bit fast for you to try that sort of thing, Thog?

*Makes revving up noises like 'Vrrrrooooom, vrrrrrooooom' as she cranks up the throttle another notch...*

::is fervently hoping that these suction cups are rated to 25 knots... grimly gritting his teeth against the increasing wind, Thog finishes welding the last seam on the Torque Thruster and, slinging his fusion welder around his back, begins *POIK...SPLORP!*ing his way back up to the deck

POIK... SPLORP!
POIK... SPLORP!
POIK... SPLORP!
POIK... SPLORP!
POIK... SPLORP!
POIK... SPLORP!
POIK... SPLORP!
POIK... SCREEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

As he is only a few feet from the top, one of the suction cups gives way and Thog begins sliding toward the rear of the ship, where he can see the quadruple-turbo blades spinning ferociously. In desperation, Thog whips out his fusion welder and, turning it on to maximum blast, heaves it at the mass of spinning props, even as he *SCREEEEEEE!!!*s toward them ever faster...::

FWOOOOOMP!!!

::the rear end of the ship erupts in thick black smoke and greenidh flames, but instantly begins to lose speed, despite the fact that faint sounds of "Vrooom, vrooom!!" can still be heard from the bridge... Thog uses this momentary respite to release his failing suction cups and, as he starts to fall toward the water very far below, he does a midair backward somersault and angles himself toward a nearby porthole, which he slams through with excessive speed, rams up against the solid wall that is unexpectedly just inside, and blacks out::

Bloody hell.

*Mystrunner leaps over the side, and floats down through the porthole.*

Stinking wall.

*Blows the wall into component atoms. Begins to bandage Thog's now bruised scalp.*

*snort*

Uuurghhh Wha??

::sees gold and bright sparkly things through his half - open eyelids... opens them further, sees Mystrunner leaning over him with bandages::

Aaaarrrgh... thanks, Myst... ackpth...

::looks at the wall he slammed into, notes with surprise that it's gone... looks past it...::

::sits bolt upright::

Look at that (he breathes in awe)!!!

::for beyond the now - nonexistent wall, there is a pile of gold bars, jewels, and that's quite a bit taller than he himself is and gleams with a ferocity seemingly unrivalled by even the harshest of Kakafroonian suns... Thog starts to drool copiously::

Well... It seems we've found the legendary Love Boat Stash...

*Mutters happily to himself.*

(Quietly to Thog) Should we tell the others?

*Runs his hand along a pure silver poleax...*

Hmmmm... really we /should/... although it wouldn't be that hard to just reassemble the atoms of this wall and pretend it never happened...

::lovingly wipes a puddle of drool off a set of diamond and platinum plated nailguns::

, though, they ARE our comrades... and there IS plenty to go around... What say we just sorta 'disappear' a few things, THEN tell 'em??

I like that thinking...

*Grabs a ruby hilted dagger, and the katana, then goes rummaging.*

Hey... wait a min- Holy

*Holds up a tube of fabric.*

Fancloth! I didn't think they still made this stuff!

::chucks his old nailguns and replaces them with the ones he's been drooling on... looks at Mystrunner questioningly::

Fancloth?? They must not'a had that where I come from -- what's it do??

::joins in the rummaging... finds a nifty little beer stein made of solid Borite... is surprised to find it full... chugs it down, wipes his mouth in satisfaction, and is about to chuck it back into the pile when he notices it's full again::
A never - emtying stein!!!

I'll show you...

*Lifts the tube up, and lets several yards fall in front of him. It appears to be a nondescript grey and then, its colours blur and blend in with the background, concealing Mystrunner's lower half.*

See? No need for spells. Uses either magic or nanotech, not really sure...

*Rolls it back up, watching the colours swim.*

Wooooo!!!! Niiiiice!!!

::rummages, finds a set of gold-plated six-shooters with pearl and amethyst grips... sticks them in his pocket to give to mari-rae later... finds another eternal stein, so pockets them both, one for himself and one for Kes... also straps on a small roundish chunk of metal that he's not entirely sure what is but it definitley looks cool::

*Heists a Bladed Yo-Yo.*

That's pretty good... I think I'm done here. Howsabout you?

Yeh -- I think I'm good too... I gotta go rig the Thrusters to the ship controls now anyway, otherwise we'll be off my timeline... do we wall this back up or leave it open for the plundering?

Not sure... We could just leave it here. That's fine by me, at least...

Eh, that's cool. I got all I wanted anyway -- maybe we can send mari-rae down here to keep her away from the ing controls while I fiddle with them...


::vanishes with a quiet *FOOP*::


::reappears on the deck... runs down the nearest corridor to the bridge, bursts through the doors, pulls mari from the captain's chair, hands her the six-shooters he found, then propels her out the door.::

Third deck, starboard side, mari!! Tell the others!!

::as she takes of down the corridor to spread the word, Thog rips off the faceplates of several control panels and pulls out his soldering iron. Taking a swig from his neverending , he starts disconnecting and reconnecting wires in a seemingle entirely random manner::

*Quietly follows Thog from a safe distance and sucks absently on an ice lolly as she watches him soldering several control panels*

Hmmm...I wonder if I should let Mari know that we might have a traitor in our midst... After all, it's been a while since she had the opportunity to torture a spy.

::looks up from his soldering::

A traitor?? Where?

::looks about ... doesn't see anyone... returns to soldering::