h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Indeed, this sounds like just the case! What say you Royal Melways?

Search high and low I shall for these most sacred of advertisments - the news of the existance of our gloriuos Kindgom should be spread throughout the land.

Now - where did you last see them? Did you actually SEND them? Did you create them? Do they exist, or is it that there is no spoon?

Thruthelthrolth?

Mayhap the hearing aid has ceased to function as it should?

Ahemmm!
Sire?
*grovel,grovel*
May I proffer some unsolicited advice?
*grovel*

I hope the hearing aid hasn't stopped functioning, the elves would be most upset.......unsolicited advice? But if I say yes, you may, am I not then soliciting it? Hmmm....but advise away whilst I ponder....

* chomp, munch* *slurp, gobble* *munch* *wipes cake and pastry crumbs off face*
Hmmfff!

Your Majesty! I have been in deep thought about the question of promotion of this magnificent Kingdom of Balwyniti (hence my present need for sustenance).

In order to attract attention we really need a shield, or badge which newly admitted citizens can affix to their abodes.

Also, in pondering the design of my court robes it also seemed that if each present courtier or retainer was to design suitable regalia they could wear it to an official court function where new citizens could be presented to the court and have their titles oficially bestowed, followed by much feasting and merriment.
*gobble*
Well sire, that's about it, I'm afraid I must toddle off to the icecream stand now as I'm feeling a little faint from lack of food.

I thank you for your semi-solicited advice, and as a matter of fact the flag of the Kingdom of Balwyniti was affixed to the welcome page a day or two ago, and this may be used on member's pages....it will likely be modified slightly to incorporate the name of the Kingdom somewhere, but for the moment it will suffice, simply download it to your server and link to it.....as for the feasting and merriment, such things are on the way, the first likely to be in honour of our glorious Queens birthday on the 9th of January.....

Sire, that's only a month away!

I humbly submit that if her Majesty's natal day is to be celebrated in style, preparations must commence immediately.

Which is why I brought it up....it is important that the entire kingdom be readied for the feast....

*Shuffling noises announce the entrance of the Royal Butler Thruthelthrolth*
Did I hear someone calling my name? I'm sorry Majesties, I've been using this wonderful contraption of the elves to listen to the cricket we spoke about some weeks ago. It seems that there are several games in progress around the world at this moment.

It sounds like you have become very enamoured of this odd game....I must congratulate the elves particularly on this achievement..

Maybe I could find one of these games and bring it into our wonderful kingdom for your majesties' pleasure?

Oh, I would be overjoyed to actually see this game played. It sounds most wondrous.

Sire, I too have heard of this game. It is passing strange.

I believe it invoves bowling a maiden over with a sticky wicket at silly mid on (wherever that is).

Yet I have never yet been accquainted with a maiden who has participated in this sport in such a capacity.

Chomp!Slurp! Also, I believe that chilled oranges are served as a mid-afternoon repast at these games. It's a good thing the worker elves are so conspicuously concientious about tending the Kingdom's Royal Orange Groves.

You say that they serve ? This sounds like the very game for the fine folk of Balwyniti....if our good butlers hearing aid can pick up these broadcasts well enough, we might find therewith enough information to be able to determine under which conditions a maiden may be bowled over, though we can rest assured that we can find somewhere silly enough for it to be done....

Sire, I will find out if the elves are able to make what I believe is called an upgrade, to my hearing aid.
*shuffles off in a cloud of dust and googlies*

Sire, I have found what I believe to be called 'cricket', yet I do not see how this wonderous game is played with such a small creature...

*deposits insect on ground*

Hmmm! Most perplexing! Perhaps the maiden is bowled over with a sticky cricket, rather than a sticky wicket.

However this fine specimen seems to have no stickyness to it.

Perhaps dousing it with some will increase it's stickiness. But not until our liege gives his assent perhaps.

Where is his Royal Highness, not lost in the dungeon labyrinth again I hope!