h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'd call that another attempted assassination Croz: Usurper!!

*chokes on foam and is blinded by sand* Um... thanks...

*wonders if the original sniper is still around... is slightly concerned by the presence of a mercenary sniper*

*stubs toe on step* AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!

*panics*

so the sniper is also a builder!

Murder by stubbed toe... hmmmm... very diabolical - and interesting!

*writhes in agony*

*puts a bandaid on Peregrin's toe*

There! Better?

*looks in confusion at the sand and foam*
OOOOOh foam party!
*kisses his toe better*
All mended!
*runs off in search of the assasin ready to whack him with her fairy wand*

*mutters something about needing a *

<BB<

Come on Bluebottle, you're all stitched up now & not deaded anymore. I'll knit you a fancy bandage if you'd like?

Hmm, the assassin seems to have vanished completely. Unfortunate, as I was counting on him/her to give me a good excuse to end my term of office... I'll probably end up being impeached in shame now.

*is reminded of a certain American president*

I wouldn't Granny [congrats again ], I've heard that the mercenary was paid by.....[points finger accusingly] Bluebottle!

OOooooooooooooooooooooooooohhh.....!!!

all we need is Jerry Springer!

*blushes furiously*

*hides*

why, have you done something you want to hide....like shoot anyone!!

*After a brief visit to A676352, the assassin returns with the goods to finish the job good and proper*

Excuse me Mr. President sir, could you hold this box that says "Danger! atom bomb! for sake leg it!!" while I go over to that nicely placed bunker the other side of that grassy knollish like place and press this button? Thank you kindly.

*Promptly legs it and presses the button*

Hmmm....
Do you think he wanted to plug it in first....? It doesn't seem to have any power...

<BB<

Damn I knew I forgot to do something.

Here, hold this remote detonator while I take the bomb back to the bunker to plug it in and charge it up.

so....bb is helping blow up the president....I feel an opportunity to cause political mayhem coming on
FwT