h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Male strippers...............

An' I'd beforced... togougemyown... eyes out... *sigh*

*Myst rolls over, and s*

This dratted footstool won't keep still!

*Shoves Myst's body into a more convenient (to her) position before replacing her feet and reclining on the couch*

Yeah. Male strippers Caerwynn...Do you have any recommendations/preferences?

Perhaps we should advertise for a nice young man to work behind the bar and insist that his job description includes the giving of foot massages...

Some maseurs would be a nice touch, too. Or we could invite some body builders in and watch them oil their pecs.

*Grunts from the kick, and murmurs to himself.*

I heard that!

Now I am starved for pizza after reading the backlog! I like the way you think, Hypatia! Thumb through the yellow pages and see if there are any 25 year old Italian studs available...

*returns from tying the charred and tattered remnants of his loincloth about the more dramatic portions of himself and enters the main room just in time to overhear the male stripper / masseur/ bodybuilders oiling their pecs bit of the conversation.*


I think, my dear ladies, that both myself and yon footstool there would be forced to register very strong protests against any sort of action of said type.

But can you make pizza, Thog?? THAT is the question...

*sneaking peeks around the loincloth tatters, but her trifocals are smeared...*

*considers the merits of a kilt*

Well of /course/ I could make a pizza, m'dear, but it'd be quicker, cheaper, and would involve far less bashing of small furry animals over the head with a stick if we just ordered a pizza from that little place around the corner...

I like mine with Onions and Tomatoes; Big Kosher Pickle and *-fried potatoes....

Oh, wait, that's a cheeseburger.

F'ry 'nimls... hate 'm so...

Snerk? Fwulz?

*Mystrunner jerks upright, connecting sharply with the underside of the bar, and groans, bouncing back.*

Why do my mornings start like this...?

*hands Myst a and a *
Well, the fact that it's ing day should at least answer that question...


*retrieves his MOD-whompin stick from its corner and vanishes, off to another thread to do some serious MOD-whompin*

Male strippers. Hmmm, well it would save me killing time if i had something else to kill.

*Winces, and accepts the drinks.*

Thanks, Thog.

I suppose some slaughter would be entertaining... But I'd need a blindfold. Like I said, the gouging of the eyes, and so on.

Ladies, do I sense some resistance from the ...er...probably male...corner? Relax, chill, and have a ==========~~~~~. The Italian stud will be a mere plaything, a commodity to be used up and then discarded like yesterday's newspaper.

Checks yellow pages. Mares...Quarterhorses...Stallions...Studs! Ok, we're in business. American...Basque....Belgian...Canadian...Dutch....English...French....German....Hatian....Irish...Italian!!!!

Pulls cell phone out of her tapestry bag and starts to dial.

*crosses her fingers*

Make sure he has a fine head of dark hair and green eyes if possible.

*Calls from corner.*

-And see that he's blindly oblivious to danger!

So, you've had couple weeks for finding some sweet and lovely men for me. Any success?

Hypatia's busy working on it Hati. In fact, methinks she's arranged to personally interview several of the applicants. That woman is so selfless...

*Misses Myst's torso and wonders who else would double up as a footstool*

Linus? Are you conscious?

*Peers across the bar and notices Mari peering closely at Thog*

Mari! Your glasses are all steamed over again dearest!

Oh, sounds so great!
I can wait a little, say 8 minutes...