h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Arches an eyebrow at Dirk, and rubs his knuckles in silent annoyance.*

D*mned cock-up... ooh, look at me, I'm so studly... never could stand them

Dirk sits at Hati's table. He takes her hand and gently moves it to his lips.

You are so beautiful. My heart races with desire. The old man with the scythe is not for you, my lovely one. Come, dance with me.

He leads her onto the dance floor and clasps her to his chest. Softly he hums the sun will come out tomorrow

Hati smacks him and stomps off!

Don't go, my sweet, he calls after her. My life is empty without you! Come back and dance.

*escapes to her corner and downs another *

I guess I should change my orientation...

...*from the wet, muddy tangeled mess Pan calls out...*
If you spin an orential around do they become DISoriented?! Stop that Spike!GWENNIE!!!!! GET
YOURDANGDOGS OFFME!
...*crawls into the ladies to remove her loverly red gown, opera gloves an' 'specially those dam&ed heels...as she passes Hati's table she gives Gwennie's chair a quick pull as to knock her to the floor...but only manages to wack her head against the chair's leg...*Ohmyhell...*continues to crawl...*Hati, if Creachy returns keep him busy until I can scrub off and change...he's a wonderful dancer!...*glares at Gwennie as the goose egg throbs on her forehead...*Any of you *ahem* Ladies are welcome to pick thru my extensive wardrobe in th loo. Even if ya' ain't a "lady"...*looking at Gwennie...the door to the loo hits her in the a** on her way in...*

*still in the corner downing *

*Runs fingers gently up and down Hypatia's spine to investigate*

I do perceive a slight stiffness in one or two places and just a twinkle of tension in the base of the neck. Perhaps a turn or two on the dancefloor would help?

*Whirls the patient off and around and around in pace with the music, deftly pressing healing fingers into just the right spot to loosen those little stiff muscles near the spine.*

(Thinks: Damn, this outfit's tight! I just hope the zipper holds or my stomach will drop out from where my diaphram usually is and pop out the front! Can't have that now, can we...)

Is that better Hypatia, my dear? I would be very happy to continue, but if you need more it would be best if I got you horizontal on a soft but firm surface - that sofa, perhaps?

Aah, Hello Gwennie! Sorry, I hadn't noticed you come in. Been walking the pooches, I see... Do have a too?

...*the super charged hair dryer Kasia gave Pan can be heard from the ladies...awhile later a barefooted Pan emerges wearing
a long burgundy gown with the right sleave sliced open from shoulder to elbow, then elbo to wrist...the left side is bare, showing Pan's tatoos front and back...her hair has one slim braid on both sides that meet in the back to continue until they meet & become one...the sent of pachulli oild wafts along with the flow of her gown...her fingernails seem an inch longer them they had been...curious...that's the type of thing you see from a woman willing to get into a 'cat fight'...Pandora purrs as she passes Hati's table...smiling at the ladies sipping their drinks...*
Oh Gwennie, heard from Mari or Kes lately? The loo is free you know. I'm sure you all can find something sexy to wear. After all...this is the dance of Love week.
...*goes to the bar for another tumbler of bourbon...*

*Walks in wearing an old red tux.*

Hello Pandora.

Leads WR to the leather sofa, cooing seductively in his ear.

*Tucks WR's behind her ear*

Thanks WR!

What do you mean "find something sexy to wear" Pan? Do I not look ravishing in my current, albeit somewhat grubby attire, complete with my ? Haven't you heard that grunge in?

*Nonchalantly sticks out her muddy wellie and trips the now not so gracefully slipping by Pan up, simultaneously relieving her of her tumbler of bourbon*

Whoops! I've got some excellent stain remover that would get that boot print of your posh frock Pan...and the paw prints!

*Pulls Spike to heel, removes one of Pan's shoes from his mouth and replaces it on Pan's foot*

Spike! Go see Hati, there's a good boy!

*Spike bounds across the pub and curls up at Hati's feet*

*sighs and downs another *

Work doesn't make anybody happier, does it?

*Sticks her fingers in her ears at the sound of the "W" word*

Happy is something I used to be before I had kids!

My kids are sleeping so theoretically I could be happy again.

Mine is starting to spend the night places...I don't know what to do with myself!

I pour into myself.

::appears from a mysterious red-tinged swirl of smoke, dressed in a very nice black loincloth and holding the triple-chromium-plated scythe from his D&D adventuring days... walks over to Hati, makes a courtly bow, narrowly avoiding swiping off a Chippendales' dancer's head, and extends his hand::

Care for a dance, m'lady?? Or, possibly better yet, care for a nice ====~~~ out in the alley??

Oh sure!
Some fresh air does only good.

*Eases Hypatia over the leather couch and in a flash has her gown opened right down the back and off the shoulders. In the absence of his magical aromatic oils, grabs a convenient and drips some over the skin to reduce the friction, downing the rest to quench a thirst. Sets to work on loosening Hypatia up as Chippy Dirk glares on, clenching his muscles*

Fear not Dirk, a good masseur could fix your back too!

*continues on Hypatia to cooing sounds and groans of pleasure*

::escorts Hati gallantly out the door, again narrowly and unfortunately avoiding the timely beheading of a chippendales dancer::

it, I keep missing those guys!

Here, Hati, I rolled an extra special one this time, seein as how I'm gonna be alone on v-day... light it up, but be careful!!! It'll be a bit... ummmm.... ...
::passes the unlit over::

---------------------------------,

---------------------------------'

*lights the *

*inhales carefully as she is going to be alone on Valentine's too (and all the other days, as the matter of the fact)*