h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It has just come to the attention of The Celery's campaign staff that the h2g2 Police Force, http://www.h2g2.com/U129235 has just confiscated several of Marv the Grate's brownies on suspicion of them containing illicit substances. In a daring raid, Chrome101, Cyberpunk Cop, lured Marv the Grate, Gw7en and Baron "KUMABEAR" Slide outside the Church of the True Brownie, where he ambushed them and confiscated the samples. He is currently taking the samples to Crater Labs, Inc. for chemical analysis and says that charges may be laid, depending on the results. http://www.h2g2.com/F25058?thread=64406 The Celery hopes that the chemical analysis proves the rumours to be false, because The Celery could not bear the thought of such a practice actually happening on h2g2. It shocks him to think of the younger researchers being corrupted without thier knowledge. All we can do now is wait ...

Statement from Peregrin:

I think the recent raid on the Church of the True Brownie is deplorable. Nobody other than The Celery would do such a thing in a place of worship. And the idea of The Celery's supporters setting themselves up as 'the h2g2 police' (I quote) is equally distasteful, especially considering their branch STUMPED, their connection with disorganised crime.

I think that The Celery should personally apologise to Marv the Grate. Anyway, who cares if the brownies contain illicit substances?

P.S. I apologise to The H2G2 Police/Fire(wo)men - I hadn't realised it was a previously set up organisation. However, don't let The Celery order you around!

Don't worry about it Peregrin. I wasn't aware of them either until this came up, but apparently they've been around awhile.

I wonder if maybe they should be involved in the DD poisoning investigation.

It appears that DD has hired his own investigator
http://www.h2g2.com/U145854
and it really seems that someone in a coma should be concentrating on recovering consciousness instead of going out and hiring police.

*The Krylma Leader enters*

I would just wish to point out that STUMPED is not a branch of The Celery's Campaign, Crater Labs, Inc., The H2G2 Police/Firefighters, or any other such buisiness. STUMPED is going to be a neutral force in the election, seeing as supporting any candidate would give the others an unfair advantage.

I also wish to point out that STUMPED won't be listed as part of Afgncaap5's domain for much longer. Once I regain the form that was stolen from me, I will no longer require the use of this body to work my plans.

In any event, please do not list STUMPED as being in support of The Celery or any other candidate yet, lest I decide to become involved in the election in however way I see fit.

*The Krylma Leader exits*

Oh really? Whoops. Easy mistake to make though - the list of STUMPED members and Celery supporters looks suspiciously similar.

Yes, GL and I are listed under the "friends of The Celery" list, and the "members of STUMPED" list. I don't take offense, though. That kind of mistake can happen to anyone.

Hmm... I think that we ought to start considering the possibility that DD either poisoned himself or is faking it. His campaign has doubled in effort since he's been hospitalised - is it just a big publicity stunt?

It's a good point, Peregrin... One very suspicious thing that I noticed.... The DD campaign had already issued a press release stating that he had been rushed to the hospital, BEFORE the ambulance even arrived at the F&F. You'll note my confusion over this point when it happened: http://www.h2g2.com/F24306?thread=65669&post=486278

I suspect "the h2g2-police" poisoned DD. And the investigation of the brownies is falsified.
No policeforce would enter a church, so you know they are fake.
They have to be carefull or I have to order my men to get rid of this so called "police".

It is time to take a stand to this kind of rumours.

If you took the time to read the thread, you will see that the police never entered the Church. The confiscation took place outside.

Pierrot: Aaaaaawwwwk, hit the books

Forgive me for butting in... but surely the church is standing on Holy Consecrated Ground? I would hate to think that all those poor souls buried in the graveyard are not buried according to convention!

Hmmm... just who ARE all those souls buried there btw? Could this be saomething else which needs investigating!

shazzPRME

Anyone buried in the Church graveyard, is there because he or she was a maurder to the cause.

?? Do you mean a Martyr Marv? Is it THAT difficult to be a true supporter then? I really would prefer to stay alive if it's all the same to you!
shazzPRME

I agree, brownies are great, btu to die for it??

I can hardly be accountable for Redbeard not being able to follow where I was osting what at the time of the poisoning, may I point out I *was* in a coma at the time. Also maybe he is just covering his own trackes now by throwing a bit of cionfusion in the works.

After all as a post researcher I have very good contacts in the press and my WAP phone is always on.

Ah that is why you are staying here all day. I wonder if you are going offline to sleep, or do you continue all along DD

Sleep, you tell an insomniac to sleep. If your not killing orphans, now you want insomniacs to sleep. Don my old friend you need to exercise caution with that tongue of yours.

My fault. I must not have seen you activate your WAP phone to call the Post while you were unconscious on the floor clutching your throat, DD.

Who said it was n't on when I came into the F & F