h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

So you're saying that you contacted the Post to let them know you'd been rushed to the hospital _before_ you were 'poisoned'?

*Chrome101 enters*

OK, OK, everyone. Let me give you the full lowdown on the illicit brownie thing.

The h2g2 police *is* real - just ask the Cheese and KornBall - they created it!
Although I was the only officer leading the raid, I admit that there was a slightly threatening manner in which I performed the raid. This aroused the CoTB members to righteous indignation, whereupon they stomred the CLI complex, where the Brownies where being analysed.
There was a slight altercation between me and a certain member, stopped when I came to my senses and realised that violence isn't the best way to solve everything.

That straighten things out for you?

Testing of brownies complete except for one last brownie. All clear so far.

Just make sure that you have ALL the reports ready for the Post to scrutinise

We can't give you *all* of our reports. Or do you mean the ones relating to the Brownie Testing?

heh heh heh
I Love You, Alice B. Toklas!
*scurries away*

~A Message from an As Yet Unofficial Candidate~

One Candidate actually is for sale! And buying votes no less! I have here
free wine for anyone who wants it, grown illegally on the premisis of the
Aroma Forrest, unbeknownst to it's owner, Irving Washington. Wine for
votes! Remember that campaign promise!

If elected I hereby promise to eliminate all undesireable elements in our
society, and bring peace to the masses under my autocratic rule! I promise
to build the largest military that H2G2 has ever seen. I promise to declare
war on all neighboring websites! All losing candidates will be purged from
our ranks! Wine will flow in the streets, mixing with the blood! The H2G2ian
race will rule the Internet, and I will be its leader!

VOTE MASQUE OF THE RED _______ FOR MILITARY DICTATOR!

Despite the fact that The Masque Of The Red Herring (from this point on known as Red) is running for office, STUMPED will still remain an impartial factor in the election. While the supervillains may choose to act on their own to eliminate or threaten other candidates, STUMPED itself is not going to endorse these activities.

In other words: "Red, good luck! Bring terror and destruction wherever you go! Sorry we won't be backing you officially, but good luck anyway!

The Krylma Leader

Just the ones relating to the brownies of course! We do not wish to uncov... pry into your other affairs!

We're at the last brownie. However, it's a rather complicated one, and the testing will take a great deal of time. I spent half an hour last night mapping the surface of a crumb.

He must be a triple Virgo.

Who, me? No, I'm no virgo.

I wonder what Red will look like in the Rogues Gallery?
He can't possibly be any scarier than Irving's picture in the Book Nook.

We've found a suspicious green fuzzy material on the surface of the brownie. Are investigating.

Er, ditto.

I take that as an insult, and so does Irv!

I understand that STUMPED won't back me, because STUMPED is run by one of the celery's leading supporters. I however, do intend to institute a STUMPED based government upon my inevitable election as dictator . The first thing I need is a running mate. I'm not sure what to call him... "Minister of Propaganda", "Citizen Pane", "Chairman of the Thought Police". Anything sound good? Any volunteers? Chrome, you'd balance the ticket nicely...

/Red

The green fuzzy substance which was previosly mentioned to be growing on the last brownie remaining in CLI, is no doubt due to the improper storage of the brownie. We (the members of the CotTB) know that this brownie has been mishandled. We have been holding vigil outside of CLI for some time now.

Our brownies require refrigeration. They sould not be kept on a table by an open window for days on end.

BBS

Ya wot he said!

Scurries across floor with half-eaten brownie in mouth. Heading back to CotTB.

Sure, it would be nice to be an evil running mate. I personally think "Dr. Chrome, Propaganda Man" sounds alright. (BTW, I'm looking forward to rereading 1984 on my holidays.)



(Of course, that would interfere with my alleigance to the Celery, but this plan of Red's is all academic, isn't it, Red? Isn't it?)