h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That would be interesting.

Just as long as people are having fun through it I support it.
And I resent allegations of being involved with the CIA. MI5 I can take, but not the CIA. Special Branch even, but not the CIA.

That wouldn't be anti-American sentiment I hear, would it?

Pierrot: Aaaaawwwwk, first DD, now B.

And let's

Keep the
Great in
Britain

while we're at it.

No, not anti-American. I just don't like being accused of being with something many people associate with being nasty *******. Then again, MI5 are nasty ******* too.

I accuse The Celery of being a lazy ******* who'd simply delegate all his authority to cronies. He can't even dig up his own dirt! I'm hands-on, you know. I do everything myself.

The Celery has demonstrated that he is a genius at choosing the right people to help him get things done. We have words for people who run countries all by themselves, Baldrick.

Yes, and those people usually get there via coups. No wonder you like them.

Pierrot: Aaaawwwk, break out the jackboots.

*sigh* I'm not a dictator, I just can't be arsed to get anyone to do anything for me.......besides, I've got a vice, she's just drunk somewhere. As soon as people stop enjoying the coup, I'll stop endorsing this. And you know where you can put your jackboots!
(big fight alert)

Did someone mention a fight?

Oh, I see. Well the Celery would like to say that if elected, he will be ... er ... arsed to invite participation from all nationalities, cultures, and even galaxies and dimensions. He is a strong proponent of Pan-Culturalism and Universality.

Pierrot: Aaaawwwwk, your elitism is showing

Something's showing certainly. Anyone got a towel?

*GL hands a towel to AA*

Pierrot: Aaaaaawwwwk, never leave home without it.

Well I wouldn't want to use MY towel to cover GL's a**e.

Hey, it wasn't mine that was hanging out!

Pierrot: Aaaaaawwwwk, but now you're covering it.

Who'd have thought it, GL revealed for what he really is and The Celery revealed as being virtually non-existent in more ways than one.

GL revealed for what he really is? What - someone who lends his towel in time of need, when AA denies the use of hers? And the Celery being virtually nonexistant? Pretty active for someone who is virtually nonexistant, I'd say.

Pierrot: Aaaawwwwwk, playing with fire now.

I've just realized where the confusion has come from - the Celery chose the word "arsed" in his reply to Baldrick because Baldrick had used the same word and he wanted to make Baldrick feel comfortable. As I'm sure you have noticed in the past, it is not his normal choice of words.

Pierrot: Aaaaaaawk, he's no gutter mouth

Look, I'll explain it again. I am really virtual or virtually real depending on how you look at it. Whereas The Celery is virtually virtual (or virtually non-existent as I prefer to put it).

And I quote from earlier on "he [The Celery] will be ... er ... arsed to invite participation from all nationalities, cultures, and even galaxies and dimensions."

So are you claiming that the arse is virtually non-existent too.

[Hang on, that would make sense ]

Lost for words?

Pah! This means that my wickedly witty comment about GL being revealed and The Celery (an appendage of GL , I believe) being non-existent was wasted.

And the bit that sticks out at the back of me is my ABDOMEN. I am an INSECT. Three sections : head, thorax, abdomen. The abdomen is where the STING is.

Amy - read my two posts above yours. I was certainly not at a loss for words and I cleared up the misunderstanding about "arsed". The Celery was using Baldricks word in his reply to Baldrick. The word "arsed" is not in his normal vocabulary.

And we (the Celery and I) are enjoying your wit!