h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Gate starts turning again*

[Walter] Unauthorised gate activation

*Switches on the old and rather rusty SG6 IDC*

*the colonel runs into the gateroom*

What's up Walter?

[Walter] I'm getting a very old SG-6 signal

Have we any long gone members of SG-6 MIA

[Walter] Yes Ma'am, Aries

*A squad of armed soldier take position in front of the gate*

Ok open up

*Walter opens the iris*

*after a suitably long delay walks through the gate*

Erm, OK, not exactly the greeting I was expecting.

*Holds up hands*

Stand down

Aries, where the hell have you been

Living in a cave, surviving, barely

*shows ragged clothes*

Escort him to medical

*walks out with medics*

<>

*follows*

*Walks into the gate room, pulling on a helmet, accompanied by his team, Sergeant McLaughlin, Captain Tummons and Captain Bishop. Walter begins dialling P3X-888 for standard reconnaissance*

[Walter] Good luck Sir

*Wanders into the control room*

Hello Walter. Do you mind if I sit here for a moment?

[Walter] Help yourself Sir