h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Shade drops in to check on things. Sees all the notes left for him and qucikly rewrites list.*
"Repairman To Do List-
Check pool filters and chlorine
Work on Footbacon's cupboard
Repair ballroom floor
Rewire internet (w/ metal tubing because of rodents) - if footbacon agrees with B.B.'s idea I'll see if my friend can setup the "wireless hotspots"


If you have anything to add just write it on my list - Shade "

*runs back out to truck and drives off*

yep, that'll be grweat, then you'll be able to connect the D.D.U. drive to the portable carboluating fryer, set to gas mark 5 and place the hard drive on the middle tray! Excellent!



Oh yes, I've just installed a new E.S.E.W.N.* mark 2 machine into the corner over there We've installed one in the kitchens for food and the like, but thought this may be handy for you. The makers have upgraded it to specialising in tool distribution, but you may occasionally get the oadd sandwich and coffee (which isn't too bad really)


*E.S.E.W.N. = Endless Supply of Everything We Need machine

*walks in and reads F.B.'s note*
An E.S.E.W.N. machine? Wow, Footbacon must have connections somewhere.
*grabs a new filter and a bottle of chlorine for the pool and sets off*

*3 steps out the door, Shade remembers something and comes back through the door*
*Picks up the the phone and dials "U722281"*

"Ring, ring. Hi is Duck there? ... Hi Duck, this is Shade ... could you install a few wireless hot spots for me at the HHH hotel? ... Thanks, Saturday's ok right? ... See you then, bye."

*leaves again, hoping he hasn't forgotten anything this time* >>>>

Now I'm not sure whether this is for you or the gardener - and as I'm not sure we have one you'll probably have to end up doing it anyway...
Oh yes, the Labyrinth. Hilary, Trin's polar bear pal, has charged straight through several of the fences/hedges which makes the labyrinth less labarynthine. Do you think there's anything you can do?

*Hands Shade a note which has an 'X' slashed in it by a polar bear claw* I think that's a kind of apology for causing trouble

Hello, Shade? I have a job for you, when you are ready. The door on my new office at F1767053?thread=422205 is... well, it isn't there. I have purchased a new door with the company credit card, which I shall leave propped up against the wall of the office ready for you to install when you're ready.

Thanks!

Enters the room followed by Griffin. Pulls a cot out from the pile of furniture in the corner and lays down on the cot, quickly falling asleep.

Enters the room and curls up comfortably on top of the E.S.E.W.N machine. Hopes that Footbacon will give the okay for him to stay in the tool room. Trin has a polar-bear for god's sake, and at least Griffin can be helpful.

New Repairs List:

- Re-wax Ballroom floor
- Find miracle growth agent to use on Labrinth shrubs so they will grow back enough to repair damage



Note: If you happen to know where I can find any miracle growth agent, please let me know.


-

Mentally snickers to self about being helpful/impersonating Shade and goes back to sleep.

*Wanders in having overheard previous post. Checks stains for miracle grow type stuff.*
*scratch/sniff* Agent Orange? No that definitely won't do. *scratch/sniff* Horse manure... a bit closer
*scratch/sniff* Jack and the Beanstalk Miracle Hormone Growth Promoter (TM). That might do.
*Scrapes enough off vest to fill a small 5 gallon drum and leaves it next to the sleeping Shade. With a note of explanation.*
I'm not sure if it isn't a bit too powerful. Ah well, he'll soon let me know if it is.
*wanders out*

*Wakes up and sees the fluid filled drum*
Thanks a lot Vestboy
*Notes how potent the fluid is and scoops out a bucketful, then grabs a teaspoon to measure with. Carefully climbs the stairs to the outside.*

*follows action with hands over eyes (looking through gaps between fingers)*

*Wakes up, jumps down to the floor, and pads off to the bar. *

*Walks over to the ESEWN machine and punches a few buttons while staring at the screen. Looks confused, and then disgruntled, then cancels the process and starts over again. Finally gets it right and after a few seconds a floor polishing machine impossibly pops out of a much smaller hole onto the floor. Shade lugs it off to the elevator*

*Rolls polisher in front of the machine and hits return. The polisher disappears as Shade hopes the HAZAA can figure out how to pay for the rental.*

s in with the dart-board. Measures the dart-board and then grabs some wooden boards from a pile near the door and cuts the door and cuts them to size. Assembles the frame and paints it to match the darts. Affixs the (its a dart-board) (sort of ) to the frame and s back to the bar.

*quietly marvels at the speed and accuracy of the work.*

in to the room and hides under his desk