h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*flips out of bed and scuttles into vent. systems*

*comes in from Bridge*

Whats that smell? Smells like cats. The Cat.

I will rip his suits up if he has left me anything in here.

*has a quick look around but only sees a few of cats hair in the bed*

Just as well i am a cat lover

*s in, goes over to her beloved plant and strokes it's leaves*

I am sorry are you ok?

*The Peace Lily has grown, despite a lack of water but has several leaves chewed. In the middle of the floor is a pile of slimey furr mixed with mushed up leaves and fish.*

That darn Cat has been chewing my plant. I keep telling him it makes him sick, but does he listen?

*waters the plant, writes a note saying 'if a scutter passes this way would they mind cleaning up after the Cat - there is a John Wayne badge in for you' and pins it to the door. Then lays down on the bunk for a snooze*

*A scutter sneaks in and cleans up. It then waits expectantly by the bed. It gets bored and so just nudges Mort in the side.*

*The scutter scans the ventilation system for evidence of the Cat, and throws in a ball of string*

*rolls over, grunts, dribbles a bit and reluctantly opens her eyes as she feels a poke by a big jaggy thing*

What? eh? urgh.

*spots the scutter sitting by her bunk*

Aww, thanks for clearing that vile mess up. You should put it in the Cats bunk - see how he likes it. I will see if I can get them to play Rooster Cogburn for you

*Hands over tatty John Wayne badge and pats the scutter on the head*

I wonder what chaos has ensued since I have been kipping? I suppose I could go find smeghead and find out.

*saunters off in the general direction of the bridge - slowly...*

*Wanders secretly off towards the Cinema...*