h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"You weren't here when I took the order" Raymond replied, "I'm not a bloody mindreader you know"

Humphrey exploded,not in a temper tantrum sense,but literally exploded.

"He sobered up" explained Oddy. "A creature like him can only exist in a world with some imagination, but on sobering up I guess reality returned... shame about the pub though."

"Yep" said one of the yokels taking the piece of straw from his mouth, "that pub's gonna need unnercoat, ithercoat n vanish, the wirks if'n ye get ma meanin!"

"Could do with a few more walls as well" commented Janet.

The pub began to cry,sobbing quite heart-rendingly.

"Oh shut up" Janice looked sternly at the Pub, "what are you crying for?"

"I don't like having my walls blown off" it sobbed.

Oddy,who had been keeping a close eye on Gill,started to suspect he was behind this sudden depressing set of events.

Then God turned up.

Gill had a smug look on his face as he walked towards the tattered remains of the bar, that still had hippophant remains dripping form it, when he slipped on the entrails and banged his head on the floor.

"Serves you right" said God.

"Aiya barsteward" said Gill, "Where am I, who am I? And who ordered the disco lights?"

"got ya" said God, "i always love making people see stars, makes em' think."

Janet was looking confused. "Just how many Gods are there?" she asked.

well theres only one true got the rest of us are just called ...

<God damn it, that was meant to say God no got

minor deities. We have to impersonate to get any credit around here.

"All credit to God though,he doesn't seem to mind much,gives him a sense of superiority i guess" he continued

"no that I've seen much of him lately" he added.