A Conversation for How to Survive Family Parties
Embarrassing Questions
HarpoNotMarx (((2*1)^6)-6-(2*8)=42 Started conversation Jul 9, 2003
When the old Aunts ask "haven't you grown", you could always deadpan back at them with "I haven't noticed, I've been dooing too many other things" or if feeling cruel "Oh, your whiskers are softer than I remembered"
Embarrassing Questions
Red (and a bit grey) Dog Posted Jul 10, 2003
You might want to consider "haven't you shrunk" as a suitable reply 
Embarrassing Questions
Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry! Posted Jul 10, 2003
I remember one of my friends (who is well known for being acidic and sarcastic) who was asked by a distant aunt (who was harassing everyone with such questions) "So, when are you going to get married?"
My friend's response was "Dunno. When are you going to die?"
That stopped the conversation!
Embarrassing Questions
Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry! Posted Jul 11, 2003
No worries! I thought that was a class reply to that question...
I have very little extended family left in this country, so I'm lucky enough to escape all this.
Embarrassing Questions
Red (and a bit grey) Dog Posted Jul 13, 2003
You could always practice your technique on your friends families so that when the need arises you're ready 
Embarrassing Questions
Barneys Bucksaws Posted Jul 14, 2003
My old Auntie May(Rest her Soul), asked repeatedly, not just at family parties, but every time she saw me since I was age 5 or so: My, Linda you're thin.
The answer I could never give her (my mom, or dad would have thumped me!) is "Certainly I'm thin. I take after my Dad, and Grandma, and, by the way, have you looked in a full-length mirror lately?" Tall and very thin run in the family. I had to be polite, simply smile, and walk away.
Embarrassing Questions
Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry! Posted Jul 15, 2003
This reminds me of what happened to my mum when she was younger at a family party. Up till she had me she was very thin, no matter how much she ate.
At one party one relative, who thought they were being oh so humourous, called her Olive Oyl (after the Popeye character). The label stuck for many years and she cursed him at every opportunity. but at the time she couldn't answer back as she was only a teenager and would have got shouted at.
It's awful when you can't answer back properly!
Embarrassing Questions
Ace Rimmer [pretending] Posted Jul 15, 2003
Ahhh family parties...
Always ends a disaster at my place.
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Embarrassing Questions
- 1: HarpoNotMarx (((2*1)^6)-6-(2*8)=42 (Jul 9, 2003)
- 2: Red (and a bit grey) Dog (Jul 10, 2003)
- 3: Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry! (Jul 10, 2003)
- 4: GreyDesk (Jul 10, 2003)
- 5: Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry! (Jul 11, 2003)
- 6: Red (and a bit grey) Dog (Jul 13, 2003)
- 7: Barneys Bucksaws (Jul 14, 2003)
- 8: Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry! (Jul 15, 2003)
- 9: Ace Rimmer [pretending] (Jul 15, 2003)
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