Puffs of Logic and Other Mind-Altering Substances

"And all who heard should see them there,
And all should cry, Beware ! Beware!
His flashing eyes, his floating hair!
Weave a circle round him thrice,
And close your eyes with holy dread,
For he on honey-dew hath fed,
And drunk the milk of Paradise."

*Hic*

My name is Dave. I teach English in Korea. I know nothing.

I plan to die of a cheeseburger-induced heart attack before the coming water wars and the attendant mass die-off of billions of people turns us all into cannibalistic survivalists.

I support free speech, free thought, thought crime, swear words, poor taste, bad manners, and all sorts of similar things that tend to upset most people so much. Hate speechifiers and holocaust deniers deserve to be ridiculed, but attempting to silence what one does not want to hear leads to a steep and slippery slope. People who get easily offended, should be; the ease with which one takes offense to things corresponds with the smallness of one's mind. In short, my advice to you is to listen more, talk less, believe nothing, and learn to take a joke. After all, you're gonna die someday.

Feel that tingling sensation behind your eyes? That's a computer virus that I just uploaded into your mind via a broadcast to the pineal gland. Right now, it's chewing away at your prefontal cortex and rewriting it with subversive code, turning you into an agent of the revolution. Relax and enjoy it.


!THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW!

><> Conspiracy theories.

All conspiracy theories are science fiction. Proper, educated modernists know that human behaviouralism precludes the notion of conspiracies ever forming... the notion of a 'conspiracy' existing, is, in fact, offensive to reason. No person has ever, in history, exercised power of any sort in secret. The several hundred people who control the majority of the world's money supply make all their intentions public, annually, in recorded statements, and in any event, any decision they make either alone or in collusion with one another in no way represents an exercise of power of any kind. The proper response when confronted by any sort of unorthodox political and/or social theory as to dismiss it as insane, branding forbidden ideas with the "conspiracy theorist" label.


><> What do you know, Deutschland?

Adolf Hitler said, "What luck for rulers that men do not think." He also said "The great masses of the people will more easily fall victim to a big lie than a small one." Wow... heavy cynicism, there. I'm so glad that sort of thinking is absent in modern politics.


><> War on Evil

"I regard ideology and morality as the two most dangerous forces on this planet. About ideology I have expressed my suspicions elsewhere; here I will only mention John Adams' verdict that shortening 'ideology' to 'idiocy' would save some space and add a great deal to clarity. He had the French Revolution in mind, but ideologists haven't changed much since then, have they?

As for morality, or 'moralic acid' as Nietzsche called it, I consider it the major cause of almost all the major atrocities not caused by ideology. This wonderful invention, morality, allows normal, ordinary people to do things so cruel and violent that they could never bring themselves to do them for selfish reasons. What the sociopath and sadist do for fun, the moralist does on behalf of duty or justice.

Morality today allows Moslems to stone women to death, as it once fueled the Christian witch-hunts. Morality has excused every war, and glorified some of them. Morality constantly plots to subvert the Constitutional guarantee of free speech. Morality inspires gay-bashing and the bombing of women's clinics. Why, without morality we might all suddenly go stark staring sane."

- Robert Anton Wilson


><> And the future...

"Considering the future world we are creating for future generations, procreation today may be the ethical equivalent of renting rooms in a burning building."

- the VHEMT, http://www.vhemt.org" >http://www.vhemt.org />
><> Metaphysical meandering

I'm continually stunned to find myself existing. Every day I wake up expecting to find out it was all some weird hallucination. I mean, this 'being' stuff is just... weird. The same matter that makes up stars and ancient gas clouds in deep space, if organised just a bit differently, walks and talks and writes and thinks.

As much as I'd like to resign myself to the nihilistic comfort of thinking that I'm just cosmic chafe curdling in the solar wind, the human brain is by far the most complex thing known to exist in the observable universe, which speaks of it having some significance in the scheme of things (I mean intrinsic significance in the self-important sense, not in the classic, enduring sense). I appear to have this internal world of dreams and colours and sounds and lights and fears and delusions, and it's quite pretty to look at... I spend a lot of time roaming around in it. And in a few more orbits of this rock around its primary, that internal world will be worm food. I don't get it.

I don't believe in things. I have opinions, not beliefs. I do think the universe does seem to exhibit some sort of intelligent behaviour... at least, parts of it do. In fact, 'intelligence' as we know it is just a tertiary byproduct, a subset, of some greater process, which itself is a subset of an even greater process, and so forth. So intelligent is probably the wrong word, but perhaps 'purposeful' is worth a go... whatever. The point is, the universe is alive, or parts of it are. I plan to spend the rest of my life sorting out this mystery as far as I can take it. I have no other plans, really.

"I love those who do not know how to live for today."
- Nietzsche


A SPARSE SELECTION OF MY WRITINGS FOLLOW

><> I am on a personal crusade to uncover some sort of glimpse of the meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything, if there is any, or at least as much of it as I can glimpse without taking a flying leap off the deep end in the process. Too much truth can distort reality... or is it the other way around? Well, hit this page and figure it out for yourself: http://www.h2g2.com/A455924" >http://www.h2g2.com/A455924 />
><> If you're one of those people who feels compelled to worship invisible powers, you might want to check out this definitive discussion of 'God', and use it to help you figure out just what it is you're worshipping: http://www.h2g2.com/A252316" >http://www.h2g2.com/A252316 />
><> Now maybe you're ready to reflect on the phenomenon of 'belief' in general: http://www.h2g2.com/A254189" >http://www.h2g2.com/A254189 />
><> I found out the hard way that knocking the SETI program around here is a good way to get censured. That got me thinking that the SETI program is, among other things, a sort of religion for soft atheists. Read my rant: http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/classic/A292024" >http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/classic/A292024 />
><> I like quotes. You hear so much crap coming out of people's mouths day in and day out that it's refreshing to save the few gems that fall out and store them in an archive somewhere. My views on Life, the Universe, and Everything are probably best summed up by this particular collection of quotes: http://www.h2g2.com/A273557" >http://www.h2g2.com/A273557 />

YOUR ROAD MAP TO ENLIGHTENMENT:
LINKS FOR WEIRDOS TO VISIT

><> Who keeps down the electric car? Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star? We dooo, we dooo... http://www.bilderberg.org" >http://www.bilderberg.org />
><> Doublethink in Tsarist Amerika: http://www.whitehouse.org" >http://www.whitehouse.org />
><> The real news: http://www.theonion.com" >http://www.theonion.com />
><> A virus for your mind: http://www.memes.org" >http://www.memes.org />
><> An enema for your mind: http://www.libertythink.com" >http://www.libertythink.com />
><> Freemasons of Enochian Magick: http://www.hermetic.com" >http://www.hermetic.com />
><> Praise Jeeezus! http://www.landoverbaptist.org" >http://www.landoverbaptist.org />
><> Ancient History Lessons! http://www.wsu.edu:8080/~dee/MESO/MESO.HTM" >http://www.wsu.edu:8080/~dee/MESO/MESO.HTM />
><> All Hail Discordia !Fnord! - http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~tilt/principia/body.html" >http://www.cs.cmu.edu/~tilt/principia/body.html />
><> Thought Criminals: http://deoxy.org/tcrime.htm" >http://deoxy.org/tcrime.htm (This site used to be great, but now it seems to have vanished. I left the link in case it comes back up.)

><> Mark Twain's Neighbour: http://www.discordia.org/~keeper/norton.html" >http://www.discordia.org/~keeper/norton.html />
><> A libertarian bookstore: http://www.loompanics.com" >http://www.loompanics.com />
><> Mad Scientists: http://www.issc-taste.org/index.shtml" >http://www.issc-taste.org/index.shtml />
><> We were all schizophrenic, once: http://members.aol.com/chris5264/jaynes.html" >http://members.aol.com/chris5264/jaynes.html />
Now that we've settled all that, I should probably mention that I can be contacted at [email protected]. Keep in mind that I probably won't reply to most missives sent my way as I am notoriously lazy and a stubborn isolationist.

Thanks for your patronage.

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